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I was chatting with an old time friend and he asked how much weight I've lost. I went from 298 surgery day to 195 at the moment. He complimented me and at the same time says "I'm a little jealous but I want to do it the hard way by going to the gym"

Really?

I replied this wasn't easy! Many people think it is but that's their own ignorance speaking. Surgery is a tool, if you don't use it correctly it won't work.

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I totally agree!!! Surgery is not the easy way out!!!! First you go through the pain then you go through the mental part. It's so hard not getting to eat what you want anymore. Dealing with your family eating what is considered good food when your eating healthy and a very tiny amount. Yes in the long run it is worth it, but it is far from easy!!!

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

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This is the reason I've been very selective regarding who I tell about me having this surgery! So many people think it's the easy way out and on the contrary I have never done anything so hard in my life! I really wanted to launch my blog and than I put a halt on it because I really don't want or need the negativity (none of us do). Continue to be great and do great and like someone said tell them "good luck". If this was easy everyone would be doing it!

"In the end we only regret the chances that we didn't take."

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Or turn the tables on him and be super "helpful". Offer to give him a copy of the strict diet plan you've had to follow all the way from preop to now. Let him in on the "secret" of measuring and tracking every bite that goes in your mouth. If you use an app like MFP, invite him to join so you can share daily menus. Let him know how important Water and Protein goals are and how staying away from carbs is vital for him to successfully lose weight. Once he sees for himself just how much effort you actually put into your weight loss, he may change his tune.

I had a few people smart ass, jealous girls make somewhat similar comments and as soon as I even started talking about what and how little I eat they shut the fuck up and just said "I'd rather be chubby".

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So his comment sort of made me laugh, because I feel like it is something I would say to someone if I was super SUPER jealous and I either couldn't afford the surgery or my insurance wouldn't cover it. Throwing in a rude little qualifying comment like that had nothing to do with you and everything to do with him and I would be willing to bet if he had the option to have surgery instead of going to the gym he would have taken it in a second. He said that to make himself feel better, not to intentionally make you feel badly, although likely there was just a bit of a desire to knock you down a little bit on the process.

People have their own agenda- enjoy your loss and ignore him. :)

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Thank you everyone for your comments and support. I happen to be an honest person and don't like to hide things especially from friends. But it's weird that I get praised from friends I've acquired over the last 10 years and a person I know for over 25 yrs and I'm the godfather to his daughter would make a comment like that. But I agree, his comment had nothing to do with me and was more to make himself feel better. Unfortunately a person can live in the gym but if you don't eat right you'll play the up and down weight game for the rest of your life.

Much love. :)

Edited by Nycatt

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There has to come a time when we stop beating people up or dismissing obesity as lazy. anyone who has ever known me knows my parents worked the lazy out of me when I was a small child. Lazy is simply NOT allowed for me or anyone in my family. You still have to do the real work if you want this surgery to take the weight off and keep it off.

I know that surgery is not the "easy way out" but it is a whole lot easier than beating my head against the wall before surgery trying to loose weight. For those of us who are open with others about the surgery it is important to say that we are loosing weight by eating right (and if you are doing so, working out) just like anyone else. the surgery helps to control the portions and keep carbs from knocking me down.

it is interesting to me that I have several acquaintances who had surgery, lost a little and stopped. and when mutual friends found out I was having surgery said - you will have more success than (that person) because you have always been *trying* to live a healthy life and eat good foods. in other words, I was already primed to make the lifestyle changes and simply needed a hand up to get there. I pray for the acquaintances who are still dealing with food addiction issues. food does not fight fair.

Furthermore, as far as wanting to do it the "hard way" Obesity causes health problems that shorten our lives and rob us of life in the meantime. if it is easier, if there is an easy way to beat it, I am going to take it. I want to be around to enjoy grandchildren.

this post seems rather disjointed to me, and I apologize. there are just so many different thoughts on this subject all clamoring to be expressed.

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I was chatting with an old time friend and he asked how much weight I've lost. I went from 298 surgery day to 195 at the moment. He complimented me and at the same time says "I'm a little jealous but I want to do it the hard way by going to the gym"

Really?

I replied this wasn't easy! Many people think it is but that's their own ignorance speaking. Surgery is a tool, if you don't use it correctly it won't work.

Thank him for his compliment and move along.

He's "not ready".

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