When will I stop regretting this surgery?

[adashnau 22]

I had my surgery on Wednesday and got to come home today, I am having regret too but my regret is directly related to the pain. I feel like the 40+ people at the support group meetings I've been going to since January didn't tell the truth about the pain. I was not expecting the pain, it is the worst I've ever had and I've had two children naturally and walked around with a heel fracture for more than a year before taking the time to get it taken care of.

[Alphabetize 57]

It's so helpful to hear people who have had RNY or the sleeve assure us that it does get better. I had RNY on Monday and came home with a huge case of buyer's remorse. I had no idea what y'all meant by "head hunger" but I sure do now. My coping mechanism is gone. I feel scared and what used to comfort me was a full belly, not a tiny pouch that feels like it's bursting at the seams every time I drink 2oz of Protein each hour. I just keep thinking of my kids... the years of extra life and health I probably just earned... the confidence I'll feel and relationships I'll make as a result... The good stuff. Trying to drown out the fear, frustration, pain and food-as-a-crutch with the good stuff.

[Valentina 2,642]

Okay I'm due to get my sleeve in June and everyone is kind of freaking me out. I hope everyone gets to enjoying and loving their sleeve like I imagine myself doing so....

Not everyone does get over the regret. That's why everyone thinking about WLS needs to read about the rough times and the those who never get over their regret. Does it happen a lot? No.

But it does happen.

You have to be prepared to face "the stormy" days or risk being swept away by the tsunami that follow. I believe you need to be strong and determined enough in your decision to have WLS to do it ALONE. Only then will you truly be doing it for yourself, by yourself--love yourself.

If you were expecting your journey to one of going down, "The Yellow Brick Road", sorry. It's just not--unfortunately.

Research, and read and read and read, and talk to as many WLSers as possible--both positive and the regretters. The latter is where you will receive that most thought worthy information.

Best wishes on your upcoming journey. It most certainly can be the most exciting and rewarding path you will ever follow.

Prayers going up for you.

[liannatx 897]

​The regret should pass as you heal and are able to get more fluids and foods down. I hope this happens soon for you.

Like most of us (once fully healed) I only regret not doing it sooner!

[ld33 94]

Okay I'm due to get my sleeve in June and everyone is kind of freaking me out. I hope everyone gets to enjoying and loving their sleeve like I imagine myself doing so....

It's good to be well informed of all aspects. As you can see from reading these boards everyone's experience is different and some things you just don't know until you go through it. Some days have been better than others and that's a fact. My biggest issues are the acid reflux and lower back pain. I'm taking Hydrocod/ Acetaminophen around the clock to manage it. In the past, I was able to drink a cold ginger ale or take a couple of Tums and it's over. That is not the case now. Also, I used to love a big cold glass of Water, and I can't do that anymore. Even though I don't weigh myself daily I can visibly see the weight melting off. My BMI was I think 39 going into surgery, I weighed 240, I'm 5'6. Just be well informed and ask your surgeon what you can do now, if anything, to have the best outcome. Best wishes to you.

[ld33 94]

I regret the whole surgey. I'm extremely dehydrated and absolutely miserable. I see no light at the end of the tunnel.

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I pray that things start going in a better direction. That's all I can do at this point is pray my way through.

You guys realize what you're going through is all temporary, right? That what you're going through now will be different in a week, a month, a year? It will get better, I promise. Just hang in there.

I pray so!!

[Bea41 6]

I had regrets too. I experience terrible Constipation and the stress of the whole am I eating too much or not enough. Am I drinking enough? Being tired and just not feeling good was way more stressful than I thought. But it will get better. I no longer need insulin or blood pressure meds...that's my silver lining. If you need to vent I will be happy to listen

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[Inner Surfer Girl 12,015]

I had my surgery on Wednesday and got to come home today, I am having regret too but my regret is directly related to the pain. I feel like the 40+ people at the support group meetings I've been going to since January didn't tell the truth about the pain. I was not expecting the pain, it is the worst I've ever had and I've had two children naturally and walked around with a heel fracture for more than a year before taking the time to get it taken care of.

Please call your surgeon. That doesn't sound right. Were you prescribed pain meds for home?

[Kindle 8,667]

Imagine someone who has had open heart surgery, or a hip replacement, or an ACL repair. Do you think the way they feel the first month or two postop bares any resemblance whatsoever to how the will feel at six months or a year or 5 years? Absolutely not. WLS is no different. You just had 85% of a major organ removed. Of course it's gonna suck for awhile. Not sure why you thought it wouldn't.

It Took 4 months before I felt "normal".....suffered through diarrhea, then Constipation, struggled to eat cause I was always "full", needed IV fluids 3 times for dehydration.....but I still never regretted surgery for a second. I knew these were all just part of the process.

[sharonintx 1,275]

The initial post op phase of this thing sure does suck doesn't it? You want food, you don't fully get the implications of the emotional aspect, it's hard to adjust, and to top it all off, how will you ever find any comfort being as you cannot have much to eat. I know those feelings well. All of us do.

To be quite honest, sometimes it still sucks now. When I'm at a restaurant, when it's a holiday gathering, when I cook all day for the family and can only eat 5 bites, when nothing would make me happier than a huge cheeseburger - but wait - why am I going to waste money on a huge cheeseburger I can only eat a few bites of?

Having to work through the emotional part of this journey sucks too.

Let me tell you what I've gained by having to learn to live the sleeve life. I'm healthy, I'm not ever the fattest one in the room, I never count calories, I eat how ever much I can of whatever I want, and when I see my reflection in the store window I giggle because I cannot believe that's me.

Oh yeah - and I gained peace, confidence, and emotional maturity. I got these things by having to fight my way through the regret, the wild hormonal changes, the frustration of being denied my favorite method of comfort ( food), and the realization that I had quite a few issues to deal with.

There is no price you can put on that last part. It is priceless and it has given me a new found calm and rationale that I never new existed. They call this a journey. Everywhere you look someone is speaking of their "journey". And it's all true. If you want the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow you have to go the the rough part of the journey. It's a worthy journey. You can do it.

[Dr-Patient 830]

@@oceangirlpc I LOVE my VSG! Best thing I ever did for myself! I am soooooo happy, sexy, confident, etc. I now own me. Wonderful thing!

[LipstickLady 25,682]

I personally think everyone goes through a period of buyers remorse at the beginning but it does pass .

Not everyone. I didn't. Not even for a minute.

Not taking away from the OP's experience, but you can't lump everyone into the "regret" category.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

To those who are regretting it.

You can't change it and these feelings WILL go away if you consider what may happen if you work your WLS. I have a stricture, I was nauseated for the first few weeks. I was dehydrated for a long time. I was stuck on purees for 6 weeks and couldn't eat "real food" until my 3.5 month mark. I slimed and foamed for my first year and I still vomit at almost three years out if I eat rice, potatoes or Pasta, or one bite too many. Feeling full is miserable and my meals are teeny.

I LOVE IT.

I am thin, I am healthy, I can do whatever the fluck I want to do physically. I can fit into any outfit that fits my fancy and look good. I can put ice cream in my cart (can't eat it, I dump) and no one looks at me with judgement. I am no longer the fat mom. I no longer have ouchy feet or knees. My sugar is no longer pre-diabetic. My heart is no longer in distress because of my obesity.

I rock. I am finally who I am supposed to be on the outside. I was always who I am on the inside and now the rest of me matches.

It's fabulous.

[Cari Dickenson 148]

Okay I'm due to get my sleeve in June and everyone is kind of freaking me out. I hope everyone gets to enjoying and loving their sleeve like I imagine myself doing so....

I love it! Best gift I have ever given myself. Yeah I burp a lil more... But I am not having issues with food or being sick... You really have to measure your food for awhile to make sure you dont go over or you will be miserable.... Its beautiful amazing and its work.... But its worth every pound I have lost.... was it easy at first not at all.... but I wanted to be healthy I had the determination and guts to get through the hard parts... and am at the good parts now... I had my surgery nov 30 2015 and have lost a lot of weight and I feel lots better follow the diet you wont regret it...

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

Fortunately, I also didn't struggle much emotionally after WLS. Yes, the reality of having 85% of my stomach removed was considerably different than the theory. But I understood pre-op what to expect and adapted post-op to the actuality of my new situation.

Now, over 20 months later, I've lost 100 pounds and am maintaining at 135 pounds. I have also lost my arthritis, my agoraphobia, my lower back pain, my stress incontinence. I have gained a waistline, a jawline, a social life, and a closet full of clothes sized 2 to 8. My jeans are size 4s.

If you're dehydrated, you will definitely feel depressed. If you are not moving or walking more each day, you will feel depressed. If you are depressed and have not consulted with your doctor(s) to find out how they can help you in this area, you will probably become more depressed than you are now.

So hydrate, stand up and move and keep moving, and call your doctor.

All this crap will pass. Very best wishes to you!