choicemun 111 Posted April 3, 2016 So am 5 days out and I feel great thank god. But I am so pissed off at my husband I think I may just kill him jk. Since my surgery all he has done is eat burgers and anything fast food he can find that is junk food and not only does he do that but he does it right in front of me. In a away it seems as though he is rubbing it in my face, and is funny because he normally doesn't eat fast food 5days in a row but now is like all gates open. I know I made the decision to have the sleeve for myself and no one else and is not that I want to eat the burgers but is my head is telling me "damn if I can only have that right now". And I thought since I asked him before the surgery to not eat things in front of me for a while that he understood what I was asking of him. Am just angry at a man who clams he is being supportive and is doing this. I just need some advice or anyone who went through this and how they dealt with the temptation to eat when seeing someone eat in front of you. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Inner Surfer Girl 12,015 Posted April 3, 2016 I can't answer your question about why men are so clueless. Fortunately, since I am single I didn't have to deal with this during my recovery. Other than politely asking him not to eat junk in front of you again, I would suggest that you control what you can (yourself) and just leave the room until he has finished eating. If he wants your company during meals he MIGHT get a clue. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
67GTONUT 28 Posted April 3, 2016 Well.... this is coming from a guy.... Tell him to either be support or get the fuck away from you..... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VSGAnn2014 12,992 Posted April 3, 2016 I can't say why your husband is acting like an a**. Mine didn't act like that. Sorry. But don't just sit there and sulk. Communicate. Clearly. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
silverthreads 183 Posted April 3, 2016 We guys can be slow on the uptake. Remind him that it's very difficult for you to see and smell that food--and if he has to eat it then do it outside the house. Hopefully he'll see the light! Sent from my iPad using the BariatricPal App Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cassie1996 12 Posted April 3, 2016 Men can be very selfish and self-absorbed! My husband was a great support system while i was going through the process, however now he has gained at least 25 lbs, if not more; his eating is out of control. I asked him if he would be willing to do the surgery and he said no. Maybe our mates are having self esteem issues, i don't know. Just keep your eye on the prize and focus on getting healthy and losing weight! Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
choicemun 111 Posted April 3, 2016 Thank you all for the replies I appreciated . I didn't think I had to have that conversation again but I guess I do. I am just the type of person who if I tell you something once there is no need for me to repeat myself. getting up and walking away I can do the main problem is when we are out doing things and in the car. I don't think he really sees how what he is doing is getting to me, I'll have another talk. Ps sorry that I said Men I know you are all not the same my bad that was out of anger lol. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
choicemun 111 Posted April 3, 2016 Men can be very selfish and self-absorbed! My husband was a great support system while i was going through the process, however now he has gained at least 25 lbs, if not more; his eating is out of control. I asked him if he would be willing to do the surgery and he said no. Maybe our mates are having self esteem issues, i don't know. Just keep your eye on the prize and focus on getting healthy and losing weight! Maybe they are I don't know either. Mine says he wants the sleeve in a year maybe he is just eating like that because he knows in a year he won't, I don't know. But like you said am just going to focus on me thank you. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
4MRB4PHOTO 3,900 Posted April 3, 2016 (edited) Did you speak to him and explain that his eating these foods in front of you, just 5 days post surgery, is difficult for you. Also, is it possible he is eating fast food 5 days in a row because he doesn't want to cook just for himself and it more convenient and easier, not because he is trying to "rub it in your face"? Your first assessment could be right, but determine that after you talk to him. Edited April 3, 2016 by 4MRB4PHOTO Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kaciii 38 Posted April 3, 2016 Sometimes men don't think about things like that ... So communicate . Make him understand . Also I don't mean to overstep my bounds but it was just a thought ... You're not eating right now ... So maybe that's why he's eating fast food so much ? Because there's no cooking going on? Just a thought . I'm 4 days post op and my husband has been eating fast food/ microwave food. And he does eat in front of me until I look at him and then he leaves . Maybe it's a death glare lol I don't know . But good luck . Just try to communicate how you're feeling and work together so he's not eating in front of you Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RILEYSMOM22 344 Posted April 3, 2016 Its the Y chromosome..... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Miss Mac 6,262 Posted April 3, 2016 I agree that you should have a repeat conversation about how you do not need the temptation right now. Rather than attacking him with accusations, try the "around the barn and back" approach by letting him see that this is about you and that eventually you will be more adept at making good choices, but right now he could earn brownie points by offering a little consideration to your predicament. I love men, but they are so hard to train. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WLSResources/ClothingExch 3,444 Posted April 3, 2016 ... I asked him before the surgery to not eat things in front of me for a while that he understood what I was asking of him. You want him eating nothing, right? Not only fast food? Then tell him again. It's gone on for a few days, so the ball is back in your court. You can be more emphatic this time. ... I am just the type of person who if I tell you something once there is no need for me to repeat myself. getting up and walking away I can do the main problem is when we are out doing things and in the car. There it is -- not everyone is going to see the first part as you do. As for the rest, do the driving and leave him by the side of the road. Maybe they are I don't know either. Mine says he wants the sleeve in a year maybe he is just eating like that because he knows in a year he won't, If he doesn't comply now, you'll have your opportunity for revenge in a year. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
4MRB4PHOTO 3,900 Posted April 3, 2016 Its the Y chromosome..... It carries some gentic defects. That is why the gender of the human species with two x chromosomes don't light farts on fire and laugh. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
4MRB4PHOTO 3,900 Posted April 3, 2016 Its the Y chromosome..... It carries some gentic defects. That is why the gender of the human species with two x chromosomes don't light farts on fire and laugh. Also spelling errors too, such as dropping the second e in genetic. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites