Science Fiction

[jesshold 1]

I'm new to the site and new to the idea/plan of doing weight loss surgery.

I'm almost 35 and recently had a partial meniscus removal following an exercise incident involving a C25K and a treadmill. Following the surgery my surgeon informed me that I had severe arthritis, but do not qualify for further surgery due to my high BMI (~54). In my post surgical haze (read high on pain pills and anesthesia) I started researching bariatric surgery and within hours I was tearfully starting the process of starting to speak with my friends and family about the possibility of getting this surgery.

My question is, does anyone else feel like this is a science fiction trip? The idea of losing 200 pounds in a short period of time completely bizarre (I was assured that is likely lose 145 in the first year)? I am both excited and overwhelmed with the idea of weighing under 200 lbs. I have no idea how I will look and it is hard to imagine weighing less.

Right now I'm in the early stages of this process. I'm starting my 3 month medically supervised weight loss next week, I had my psych assessment earlier this week, and had my first appointment 8 days after my surgery.

Could anyone talk about how it feels to watch your body change so quickly and any emotional prep I could start doing on this front? Is there anything that people have done to make this process feel less like science fiction?

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

[jhbeck 29]

I can tell you this. I was denied, around age 30, for the cartilage repair my knees needed. Over the years the knee issues (3 surgeries on my left knee, I refuse to even let them X-ray my right knee. I know what they will find.) my knee issues have been better and worse.

I am 42. Had sleeve surgery 6 weeks ago. Am down 37 pounds total. Bmi from around 46 to 40. So far. And my knees are SOOOOO happy. It was less instant than I wanted. A few weeks ago I was still thinking of synvisc shots. But now I can do so much more.

This postpones the knee replacement by years. And increases the chances of success. I will still need double knee replacement. But maybe at 65. I was on track for 50.

[Cervidae 2,389]

I have two meniscus tears and a completely destroyed ACL, and I'm sooo close to finally having a low enough bmi for the surgery to fix it. Hopefully this summer!

As for the rest of it... I can only tell you what I've been experiencing. I reached 7 months post-op RNY yesterday, and I'm down 126 since surgery. This time two years ago, I weighed around 440 pounds, so by now I've lost around 180 from my highest.

I knew this whole process would be... difficult. Or baffling, at the very least. It's also been revealing of my friends, of my family, and of the self I buried under almost 300 extra pounds of weight. It's been a wild roller coaster of hormones and an indescribable sense of relief that I now have a chance to live past 30. Looking in the mirror is a confusing experience. I barely recognize myself, I don't feel at all like myself, and at the same time I somehow feel bigger and more obviously overweight than I did when I was over 400 pounds (super weird, right?). I now obsess over what I should wear, and change out of multiple outfits, and end up leaving the house still feeling very visible, like a giant sore thumb. Sex is a very different and, in some ways, more enjoyable experience than it used to be, and yet I feel more self-conscious now than I ever did. I think all of these new insecurities aren't popping into existence because of how heavy I actually still am - that's still a confusing thing for me visually. I know what I am on the scale, I know I probably have 30-40 pounds of excess skin at this point, and still, I feel this anxiety and insecurity about my looks. I think this is all centered around my very rapidly shifting sense of identity.

I'm so, so different on the outside. How could I not be? I'm approaching 200 pounds lost. But the outside changes don't even hold a candle to how strange and incredible it feels inside. 7 months and I'm still trying to process all of this. At this point, I'm just going to Celebrate my progress and health and hang on for the ride.

I would do all of this over again a thousand times if I needed to, and with a huge smile on my face and a song in my heart.

[jesshold 1]

Thank you Cervidae! That is exactly what I'm afraid of and excited about. I've spent many years building my self esteem and being "happy" with how I look. I've even gotten some acclaim by being a local belly dancer. im worried this change will happen so quickly that I'll be behind the curve in body acceptance. My boyfriend is excited (partially as it will force him to eat more healthily as well). I'm both excited and concerned about our sex life.