Discouraging family member......

[Scarolann 2]

I apologize right now for my vent......

Today my Aunt called me & she is fervently trying to talk me out of my sleeve!!!!! She is trying to talk me into the lap band OR just "dieting"! After 35 minutes of going round & round I was so discouraged:( She just keeps telling me Im changing my lifestyle...ummmmm yeah, I am!! I told her that this has been over a year long that I have been going thru the process etc.

My husband & daughters are supportive along with a few select friends so I know I need to just let it go but I was so upset today & now I keep thinking what if I don't get approved for some reason??

On the flip side, my eating (or lack of) was awesome! I got all my liquids in & all my Protein in:) Im kinda doing a "pre" pre-op because Friday is when I prayerfully start my 10 liquid pre-op.

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

Jeez!

There's this thing about some relatives ... they think, despite their utter ignorance about WLS, that they have the right to make their relatives' decisions.

And they are shocked, even pissed off, when you don't hand over to them the reins to your life.

Ignore her ass.

[labradormom21 13]

Do what's best for you! They have absolutely no right to your life at all. They aren't being supportive and that really really sucks, I'm so sorry you have to deal with this but just keep your head up! My BEST friend told me my stomach would explode and I'd die instantly the first time I over ate. Yeah.... Not true obviously, but you can't let stuff like that phase you (I know, easier said than done). But everything will be fine. Just do what you know is right. I just was sleeved on the 9th of March, and I haven't regretted it one bit. You will do amazingly, and you've been in the program a year already right? You've shown yourself (which is most important) how dedicated you are to going through this process. Just think about what is best for YOU and keep your head up. Stay strong girl, you're almost there!

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

[Inner Surfer Girl 12,015]

Congratulations on getting on your Protein and fluids.

As for your Aunt, try just saying "Thank you for your concern. I appreciate your feedback but I have already made my decision with the help of my doctor." Or, something similar.

She sounds well-meaning but uninformed (especially if she thinks the lapband is somehow acceptable but the sleeve isn't).

We definitely get the opportunity to practice setting boundaries and being assertive during this process.

[Valentina 2,642]

Choose you battles, my friend.

Back in the day---when your aunt probably remembers WLS, people who had it had AWFUL side effects--like craving rusty nails and dirt to eat. Many of the WLS patients died. This may be the reason for your aunt's concern. It's not that she doesn't love or care about you--she's just frightened for you.

Time to show some respect to your elders without caving. You've made up your mind. She's not going to change it, but you do NOT need to be hostile or to alienate her.

Maybe a sit down over a cup of tea--just the two of you. Try to ease HER concerns, in hopes that later down the path, she will be able to ease yours.

The best way to prove your point is to have a happy and healthy WLS journey.

[Barry W 336]

Well, I imagine she is concerned and this is after all a serious thing - so I don't think her motives are bad, but.... Still, once she has given her opinion, she should let it go. I suggest just trying to politely but firmly tell her that you have done a lot of research and made up your mind, and you would appreciate it if she would either be supportive of your decision or find another subject to talk about.