Inner Surfer Girl 12,015 Posted February 16, 2016 The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie is a book I recommend often. Today's entry on Detachment seems like it might be helpful to some folks on BariatricPal who struggle with letting go. I know I need the reminder. The Language of Letting Go February 16th, 2016 Detachment The concept of letting go can be confusing to many of us. When are we doing too much or trying too hard to control people and outcomes? When are we doing too little? When is what we're doing an appropriate part of taking care of ourselves? What is our responsibility, and what isn't? These issues can challenge us whether we've been in recovery ten days or ten years. Sometimes, we may let go so much that we neglect responsibility to others or ourselves. Other times, we may cross the line from taking care of ourselves to controlling others and outcomes. There is no rulebook. But we don't have to make ourselves crazy; we don't have to be so afraid. We don't have to do recovery perfectly. If it feels like we need to do a particular action, we can do it. If no action feels timely or inspired, don't act on it. Having and setting healthy limits - healthy boundaries - isn't a tidy process. We can give ourselves permission to experiment, to make mistakes, to learn, to grow. We can talk to people, ask questions, and question ourselves. If there's something we need to do or learn, it will become apparent. Lessons don't go away. If we're not taking care of ourselves enough, we'll see that. If we are being too controlling, we'll grow to understand that too. Things will work out. The way will become clear. Today, I will take actions that appear appropriate. I will let go of the rest. I will strive for the balance between self-responsibility, responsibility to others, and letting go. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ProudGrammy 8,322 Posted February 17, 2016 helpful to some folks on BariatricPal who struggle with letting go @@Inner Surfer Girl i keep trying to remember to buy this book Do or Do Not - There is NO Try - Yoda this weekend for sure (i think) - or shoot me thanx for the reminder kathy Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
butterfly23 423 Posted February 17, 2016 @@Inner Surfer Girl thank you for posting this! Just what I needed to read today, letting go is central to my WLS process. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites