Newbie and Scared

[cbrown1 11]

Hello everyone I'm starting my journey to weight-loss on Feb 22. I have read a lot of testimonials and I'm so thankful to each and everyone of you. My question is actually regarding if anyone is doing this because they don't have a choice. What I mean by that is I have major health issues. Stroke at 30, renal disease , one kidney, and high blood pressure. Every woman in my family this includes my great gradma, grandma, mom, and aunt all had heartattacks. Me and my mom are the only two left and I have 2 daughter. One of which is obese and following my footsteps. I have been overweight for 25 years and I'm 37. I fear my life is in danger and I'm next for a heartattack if nothing is done now. I have struggled for so long everyone because obesity is normal in my family. food is a reward and comfort. Weight-loss is so difficult and as soon as I get started a week later I quit. I did loose 90 lbs but ended up putting that back on plus more. That came on the heels of my divorce so I know that was stress related not intentional. I guess I'm just looking for some encouragement because I feel so ashamed I can't loose the weight and keep it off on my own. I see so many who are happy about their surgery in here but I feel like I failed myself. Any advice on how I can change my thinking moving forward in this process? Thank you in advance for your support.

Edited February 10, 2016 by cbrown1

[DaisyAmy 561]

Hello and welcome!! I definitely did this for health reasons first and foremost. I was always ok (but not really) with being the chubby one until my health started to take a dive (diabetes, fatty liver, endometrial cancer). Now, I am 8 weeks out, off all prescriptions and loving the changes I'm seeing.

I did 6 (actually 11 months due to the cancer) months of pre surgery weight loss visits. It was nice to start committing to the program, seeing some changes, and having the support I needed to get headed in the right direction.

Nothing tastes as good as being healthy for your kids. Best of luck to you on this exciting journey. We are here for you!!!

Edited February 10, 2016 by DaisyAmy

[DaisyAmy 561]

Oh, and I know it's hard, but let the shame go!!! You are so brave to make this commitment to your health and to admit that you need help in this journey!!! No more shame, my dear!!!

Edited bc I was telling you to let Shane go. ????

Edited February 10, 2016 by DaisyAmy

[cbrown1 11]

Thanks Daisy I appreciate that.

[sbg224 318]

I used to feel the same way, what's wrong with me that I just cannot lose the weight like other people. When I went to weight watchers and all those people lost it and kept it off, why could I not do it. I could lose it, but never kept it off. Then one day, after thinking and researching the surgery for about 3 years, I realized I needed help, and the sleeve was just the thing I needed. I needed hunger control, and there it was right in front of me all this time. All of a sudden I just thought of it like having to have my gallbladder out, it just had to be done, and sure I was scared, but it was like a calm came over me and I told myself I had no choice, 6 months now, 78lbs and I am so grateful. Good luck.

[Bufflehead 6,358]

I think you are doing a great thing. You have a medical problem and are taking the most effective known medical steps to fight back. In my mind, thinking you should be able to put obesity into remission "on your own" is comparable to saying someone with cancer shouldn't need to have chemotherapy and surgery, they should be able to heal themselves by eating organic food and praying a lot.

There are a lot of people who are too scared, too proud, or too ignorant to have surgery for obesity even though they desperately need it. You are not one of those people. You are brave, educated, smart, and not too proud to make excellent choices with your health. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise -- including yourself!

[Valentina 2,642]

Welcome!

I believe a great number of folks here have had WLS because they felt "they had no choice".

It's an "if not now, then when" moment--at least it was for me.

We are here for you--to support you on your chosen path . Whether it's to tell you of our own journey, or to answer any non-medical question--if we can. It's more than likely that you will be able to share an idea, recipe, a found Protein treasure, an experience or just chat with fellow WLS'.

We welcome you and look forward to sharing the WLS world with you.

[betterlife7 16]

I understand where you're coming from! I am getting the sleeve on February 23rd and I'm very excited! But I also feel shame or a little disappointment in myself for having to go this route! But, I've seen it work for others! So I'm taking that leap of faith so that I will be healthier! Im praying that all goes well and that i can finally feel confident about myself and my body and not be so ashamed to wear certain clothes!!!

[darnelladwashington 11]

Please don't be ashamed of yourself. Hold your head up high. I believe most of us didn't come to this decision on our own. All of us has or had health issues related to our weight. Having any type of weight loss surgery takes courage and conviction. No one decided to have the surgery then had it performed the next day. We all had/have to follow whatever doctor's orders we were given to finally get to the surgery. So stand tall and be proud because you came a long way baby. Best of luck

[jubug 9]

Be proud of you. We may all have slightly different reasons for doing what we are doing, but in the long run, we all have the same goals! To be healthy, to feel better and to be able to live up to our fullest potential!

[cbrown1 11]

Thanks everyone you have really helped me feel better. I think my focus may need to shift from self pity to being proud of myself for a new healthy lifestyle.

[Shiloh2004 20]

I am so proud of you. I am going through a similar situation and it is difficult. I, too, have many health issues which include the morbid obesity, hypertension, Migraines, lipidemia, depression, anxiety, GERD, lower back issues, hiatal hernia, etc. My Mom had to have a triple bypass. She was one of 10 kids and 5 died from heart attacks. Cancer got my Mom. My Dad died of cancer, but 2 of his 3 brothers died of massive heart attacks. I already have high cholesterol and high tryglicerides. I got to the point where I became scared. I want to stay around for a long time and be able to truly live life. I have naysayers in my life, too, telling me I can do this on my own. I know I can't. I have tried over and over. I have my surgery on Monday, the 15th. Only 6 days to go. This pre op diet is not easy by any means, but if all this will lead to weight loss and a healthier life, the naysayers can either be supportive or unfriend me. I am excited and scared at the same time.

I wish you all the very best as you get ready for this life-changing event. We are all going to do great!

[cbrown1 11]

Wow Shiloh I'm happy for you. I haven't even gotten to the point of telling others. I know with what I'm going through now if one person says you can do it on your own I'm back in my dissappointment mode. I have only told my husband and he is very supportive he wants me healthy and happy so he is on board no matter my decision. I haven't even shared this with my kids yet. I will wait until I start the process and educate myself more before I decide to share. But thank you for letting me know I'm not the only one our here feeling the way that I do.

[hoot temple 25]

6 foot 2 314 and this stuff scares me about like reelecting Obama. had bladder cancer s. but didn't bother me like this. march 21st date. passed last year at this time , help

[Valentina 2,642]

I would suggest that you read some of the "My Story's", "Testimonials", as well as many other threads that you can. One can never have too much information.

Then ask yourself the hard questions:

1. Am I healthy now?

2. Is my weight causing my major health problems?

3. Do I want to live the rest of my days in the state of health that I'm in today?

4. Am I a good candidate for WLS?

5. Have I consulted with my God, clergy, as well as my doctor?

6. If I decide to have WLS, how will I pay for it and where will I go to have it done.(sad to have to include this question, but it is what it is)

7. Do I have family/friend support?

a. If not, am I strong enough of conviction to walk this path alone?

8. Am I ready for the life changes that WLS will dictate?

If and when you are comfortable with the answers to those questions----GO FOR IT!!!

We on this site are here to give you all the support we can muster--and we can muster with the best of them!!

Keep us posted as to your decision/concerns/fears/anticipations/expectations-----often.