So sad

[2016NewMe 61]

When your 25 days away from surgery and the husband keeps going on and on about I can todo it the hard way and if it's really necessary ????

[anewme4076 2]

Let him know that this is a tool for weight loss much like going to the gym and weight watchers. There is no easy way about it. And when your body normalizes to where you can workout then he can watch you do it the hard way then.

[2goldengirl 2,076]

Have you told him how his comments make you feel? If you haven't, you should.

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

How has "the hard way" worked so far? I assume you have made many efforts to lose and maintain over the years.

It actually annoys me alot for anyone to call this the easy way out, after a lifetime of trying everything, it turned out that WLS was not easy, but was in fact the "only" way out of a lifetime of morbid obesity for me.

I have maintained a 150# loss for a few years now post sleeve and am a normal size.

[2016NewMe 61]

I did he and he says to understand but he makes it seem like oh I am just asking if you really have to go through all this for weight loss

[2016NewMe 61]

Which I tell him like he has seen mi food addiction for 4 years I've done everything and I always go back to my bad habits I need help and I am not ashamed to admit I feel like this tool will save my life ????

[2016NewMe 61]

How has "the hard way" worked so far? I assume you have made many efforts to lose and maintain over the years.

It actually annoys me alot for anyone to call this the easy way out, after a lifetime of trying everything, it turned out that WLS was not easy, but was in fact the "only" way out of a lifetime of morbid obesity for me.

I have maintained a 150# loss for a few years now post sleeve and am a normal size.

Amazing progress! Congrats! And yes I feel the same way I know he is so wrong in calling it a easy way it's not I feel like it's my only choice but it breaks my heart because makes me feel stupid and miserable for going this way for savior you know

[2goldengirl 2,076]

I did he and he says to understand but he makes it seem like oh I am just asking if you really have to go through all this for weight loss

Tell him yes, yes you DO. Everyone is different. This is your body, and your journey. Tell him you need his respect. Is he overweight? If he isn't, he has absolutely no idea the struggle that being overweight is on a daily basis. It's HARD. And if that isn't his reality, he can't understand it in the same way he can't understand what it feels like to be female.

Tell him you need him to respect that this is your body, and your decision, and that you have made this decision as investment in your health, and your future together. I hope he comes around.

[Amayor85 19]

How about you...... I guess I would not guess I would def be telling him to F off and tell him how good am going to feel and how much confidence am going to have with this tool . And how excited I am to feel good when I look at my self in the mirror !!!

girl !!! Don't let this weigh you down you have worked hard for this surgery don't allow him to do that to you !

pS - my F offs are really loud so that people get the point so you are more than welcome to use it

[prettyCali916 299]

I swear people act like we get wheeled into recovery 100lbs lighter after these surgeries! Sheesh! Tell him it's hard and you'd like his support not stress.

[Shiloh2004 20]

My husband did the same thing at first. I just told him to look at me and remember the number of diets I had tried and failed at in the past. I just came out and told him that this was my body and the decision to have surgery was mine alone. I told him I needed his total suport to be successful. He is now on board and very encouraging. I have so many comorbidities that I believe this is by far my best alternative. He is going to go see the doctor with me on the 5th for my pre op checkup. I am glad he has agreed to do that. He will then be able to ask the questions he wants answered. Stand firm. This is your decision. Good luck!

[2016NewMe 61]

So after leaving to work and both in that tense moment because of the argument he text me as soon as he gets at work and says, " I'm sorry I couldn't say it to your face but truth is I am really scared of this surgery I don't want to even think something can go wrong I need you in my life and for the first time in my life I am scared me and the kids need you" God I felt so bad I was judging him so quickly I think he is scared and was trying to talk me out of it ... Well I told him I totally understand and that it's a safe procedure and not to worry I am in good hands and thanks for him opening to me.

[2goldengirl 2,076]

He totally gets props for admitting he's scared. Just remind him that you're doing this so you WILL be around for him and for the kids, for a long time to come.

[Tssiemer1 549]

I mean I get that from my husband too.

"*IF* you get the surgery this and *IF* you get the surgery that."

It's gonna happen. I may be delayed a bit due to health problems... but it's happening!

I think that's how he copes with it.

[cheerios45 19]

I am sad with you... Just remember it will be so worth it. Hopefully he'll feel the same way. Keep your chin up!