Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Unsupportive family?



Recommended Posts

I'm really not sure how I should feel about this, first week of my liquid diet my husband was amazing! Didn't flaunt or eat certain things in front of me as a form of support. Well, this week blows! He went grocery shopping and got tons of bags of candy, tummies, chocolate, and chips! Tons! Like 6 bags and even a bag of Pork rinds. He said the boys and him are kinda like bachelors while I'm getting sleeved. tonight they are cooking tater tots and crispy fried chicken. I decided to stay in the other room until they are done so I don't drool! I haven't cheated at all, but if I see another boring shake or can of freakin cream Soup I'm going to scream!

Anyone else share my pain?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That's just rude! They can jolly well go out for their foodyoucan'teat. Grr!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I mentioned it to him, as I am struggling to avoid these foods (they are all my favs!) and I told him it's just hard, I'm a few days from surgery, tired, scared, worried, etc.

His answer:"just think about the good stuff like shopping for new undies at Victoria's Secret"

Made the fact that I'm worried and nervous seem like it's not important because after the surgery I'll be able to wear pretty undies.

Screw undies! I'm hungry and as much as I'm trying not to be a whiner, it's not fair!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Just grit your teeth. In the big scheme of things, this phase doesn't last long.

There are more phases to come. ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm really not sure how I should feel about this, first week of my liquid diet my husband was amazing! Didn't flaunt or eat certain things in front of me as a form of support. Well, this week blows! He went grocery shopping and got tons of bags of candy, tummies, chocolate, and chips! Tons! Like 6 bags and even a bag of Pork rinds. He said the boys and him are kinda like bachelors while I'm getting sleeved. tonight they are cooking tater tots and crispy fried chicken. I decided to stay in the other room until they are done so I don't drool! I haven't cheated at all, but if I see another boring shake or can of freakin cream Soup I'm going to scream!

Anyone else share my pain?

I finally had to wrap my head around this: WLS is a gift I ​give TO ME---FROM ME--LOVE ME!

I had to love myself enough to make this journey alone if the need be. I put the proverbial "stick up my butt", grit my teeth, gathered my stubbornness and determination and move forward--always forward.

Enjoy your family, smile at their "antics! --always keep in mind your journey and the wonderful life you will have when you will be able to interact with your children better, and even that "sometimes thoughtless" husband of yours.

"nothing tastes as good as thin feels"

Keep in touch

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This would drive me crazy! I'm so sorry you have to deal with that. If you are able to leave the house while they are living it up, I would. Perhaps you can go for a walk, go shopping, or go do something fun just for you. It's not cool of your husband not to be supportive during what is arguably one of the most difficult parts of the process. (It's one thing when you've got the surgery, but it's SO hard to resist temptation when you are hungry as hell and still battling major cravings before the surgery.)

Sending you positive vibes!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It's gut-check time.

You are just getting your dose early on.

You will forever be surrounded by temptation and various paths to failure. You are just getting a plethora of them brought to the forefront right now.

Too bad he has to be your s.o. for doing so. Doom on him. Remind him of it next time he wants to get busy. Hit 'em where it hurts. :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It's gut-check time.

You are just getting your dose early on.

You will forever be surrounded by temptation and various paths to failure. You are just getting a plethora of them brought to the forefront right now.

Too bad he has to be your s.o. for doing so. Doom on him. Remind him of it next time he wants to get busy. Hit 'em where it hurts. :D

Thanks Dub! You gave me a giggle this morning. I waited until the kids were sleeping and talked to him about it. I told him right now I'm like a crack head trying to kick it, and he filled the house with crack. He feels like scum for it now, and sadly he kinda should. It's like he's drinking a huge beer in front of an alcoholic when he cooks and eats what he does.

I know it's going to always be around, food in huge quantities is kinda like the American way. I'm hoping it will be a little easier when I'm A off the liquid diet and B sleeved.

My surgery is on Tuesday. Feb 2nd his nookie days are numbered! Ha ha ha ha

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Props to your husband for listening and understanding where you're coming from!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

hanks, he is a really great support to me, which I think is why this hurt so much. he feels really bad today. I don't think he realized that I have a food addiction I'm working on.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Most of us can't force our families to follow our new diet pre-op or post-op. All my former favorites are just a walk to my kitchen. snack cakes, Cookies, candy, you name it. It is not realistic to ask that of them and our being morbidly obese is not their fault. I have two small kids and a husband that doesn't cook much. Every day both pre op and post op was temptation. I am talking pizza, hamburgers, spaghetti, hotdogs and take out from my favorite restaurants. I was sleeved before Christmas. I baked cookies with my kids i couldn't touch. Made Christmas dinner, I do mean delicious favorites that I couldn't touch. Don't expect people to conform to you. You have to adapt physically and mentally. I will say dealing with temptation is so much easier after surgery. I bought a pizza for my family last night that I didn't eat. I am free to eat or try anything as of yesterday but that pizza no longer appeals to me. This surgery is hard work regardless of some saying it is an easy way out. But it is so worth it!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm really not sure how I should feel about this, first week of my liquid diet my husband was amazing! Didn't flaunt or eat certain things in front of me as a form of support. Well, this week blows! He went grocery shopping and got tons of bags of candy, tummies, chocolate, and chips! Tons! Like 6 bags and even a bag of Pork rinds. He said the boys and him are kinda like bachelors while I'm getting sleeved. tonight they are cooking tater tots and crispy fried chicken. I decided to stay in the other room until they are done so I don't drool! I haven't cheated at all, but if I see another boring shake or can of freakin cream Soup I'm going to scream!

Anyone else share my pain?

After surgery, it will be easier for you to resist. Just try to hang on for a little longer.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Between home and work my 2 week pre-op diet was hellish.

At work when my coworkers would be bringing in food to eat for lunch, I went out and took a walk and got outside. At home when my wife was making dinner I also went out for a walk. It really helped me to just get out and do something active so I didn't make myself crazy.

I know its winter but hopefully its nice enough to get outside and do something else. It really helps with the energy and head hunger too!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know exactly what you mean. I have had my whole support system doing everything but supporting this life changing decision of mine. My surgery date is set for February 8th, and I feel like I just want to go to the hospital by myself to do this. I have been in this process since July. In that time I have not once felt like my family understands or even sympathizes. Perhaps I am just taking it all to heart, and maybe they are all more nervous and worried for me than I know, but it really hurts to feel like you are facing this all alone.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • rinabobina

      I would like to know what questions you wish you had asked prior to your duodenal switch surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×