KristenVSG2014 1,872 Posted January 27, 2016 I run on the treadmill at the gym and I usually wear very loose clothes so no one pays attention to me (that freaks me out if I think people are watching me while I'm working out). However, I have a new problem at work. Backstory: I've always been overweight and was never once offered sex, drugs or rock n' roll in high school OR college. I was the fat, witty, sarcastic girl you wanted on your team project (because I'll do all the work) but don't want to date. Fast forward over ten years and now I'm a loan officer. When I was still overweight as a loan officer I struggled with sexism. Men would tell me to my face they would prefer to see the male loan officer (who would then lie and say I was the "specialist" and give them back to me). Now I'm dealing with these customers talking only to my chest or hitting on me. I had one guy have a 30 minute conversation about buying a home while staring at my boobs the entire time. I'm a modest woman. I never show cleavage at work and usually have a sweater on to tone them down a bit. It doesn't seem to matter. I've had multiple men flirting with me and I want SO badly to respond, "Would you speak to my male coworker that way?" but I don't want to lose any business just because I'm sensitive. (If it were assault I'd tear them a new one.) Hell, I've been considering dressing super cute every day and drumming up some business around the community. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em, right? Ugh. I can't. It goes against everything I believe in. I shouldn't have to flirt with someone to get their business. They should want me to help them because of my reputation. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
4MRB4PHOTO 3,900 Posted January 27, 2016 I run on the treadmill at the gym and I usually wear very loose clothes so no one pays attention to me (that freaks me out if I think people are watching me while I'm working out). However, I have a new problem at work. Backstory: I've always been overweight and was never once offered sex, drugs or rock n' roll in high school OR college. I was the fat, witty, sarcastic girl you wanted on your team project (because I'll do all the work) but don't want to date. Fast forward over ten years and now I'm a loan officer. When I was still overweight as a loan officer I struggled with sexism. Men would tell me to my face they would prefer to see the male loan officer (who would then lie and say I was the "specialist" and give them back to me). Now I'm dealing with these customers talking only to my chest or hitting on me. I had one guy have a 30 minute conversation about buying a home while staring at my boobs the entire time. I'm a modest woman. I never show cleavage at work and usually have a sweater on to tone them down a bit. It doesn't seem to matter. I've had multiple men flirting with me and I want SO badly to respond, "Would you speak to my male coworker that way?" but I don't want to lose any business just because I'm sensitive. (If it were assault I'd tear them a new one.) Hell, I've been considering dressing super cute every day and drumming up some business around the community. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em, right? Ugh. I can't. It goes against everything I believe in. I shouldn't have to flirt with someone to get their business. They should want me to help them because of my reputation. I'm sorry, what were you saying? I was distracted by your great pair of..........eyes. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KristenVSG2014 1,872 Posted January 27, 2016 I run on the treadmill at the gym and I usually wear very loose clothes so no one pays attention to me (that freaks me out if I think people are watching me while I'm working out). However, I have a new problem at work. Backstory: I've always been overweight and was never once offered sex, drugs or rock n' roll in high school OR college. I was the fat, witty, sarcastic girl you wanted on your team project (because I'll do all the work) but don't want to date. Fast forward over ten years and now I'm a loan officer. When I was still overweight as a loan officer I struggled with sexism. Men would tell me to my face they would prefer to see the male loan officer (who would then lie and say I was the "specialist" and give them back to me). Now I'm dealing with these customers talking only to my chest or hitting on me. I had one guy have a 30 minute conversation about buying a home while staring at my boobs the entire time. I'm a modest woman. I never show cleavage at work and usually have a sweater on to tone them down a bit. It doesn't seem to matter. I've had multiple men flirting with me and I want SO badly to respond, "Would you speak to my male coworker that way?" but I don't want to lose any business just because I'm sensitive. (If it were assault I'd tear them a new one.) Hell, I've been considering dressing super cute every day and drumming up some business around the community. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em, right? Ugh. I can't. It goes against everything I believe in. I shouldn't have to flirt with someone to get their business. They should want me to help them because of my reputation. I'm sorry, what were you saying? I was distracted by your great pair of..........eyes. I saw this shirt once that had two teddy bears where the boobs are and it says, "Stop looking at my teddies!" I should have gotten it, dang it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jane13 2,256 Posted January 27, 2016 @@mngreeneyes - Thank God nothing happened that night. Always carry your cell phone and have it on and ready to punch send when a situation like that is coming (Ex: walking through a parking lot and seeing some people you feel iffy about). Mace and Pepper spray are also another option - Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chrystee 838 Posted January 27, 2016 I run with headphones, so I wouldn't know.. I also run with a 90 pound American Bulldog.. I have also thought about getting a small can of mace I can clip to his leash just in case.. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dub 9,922 Posted January 27, 2016 Any dude who slows down his truck....rolls down his window......and yells out at you is an imbecile and possesses no game whatsoever. You saw him at his finest moment right there @@stacyrg1 Now.....if a guy is running along with you and compliments your effort without hounding you.....then you may have encountered a higher life form than the dipshyt in the truck. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lauraellen80 855 Posted January 27, 2016 It has been very weird getting used to being catcalled again after so many years of being an invisible fat girl. Most of the time it's just gross (yelling at me out of a moving garbage truck?), but I did have one really nice experience recently. I was waiting for a coworker to pick me up outside of a Wawa (local convenience store chain). I wasn't dressed up or anything, in fact I had on a rather baggy jacket. But a guy pulling out of the parking lot paused and called out his window to me, "I hope the rest of your day is as beautiful as you are!" before going on his way. That's the way to do it, guys! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AvaFern 3,516 Posted January 29, 2016 Ugh, I hate this. Years ago when I was at a fat point someone yelled out their car window "Run, fatty, run!". While I then threw my metal Water bottle at their car and dinged it, which made me feel moderately better, it is something I have always remembered. I hate when people yell things at you, especially guys because it makes me feel unsafe to a certain extent. There have been women who have yelled out their car window "you go girl!" or something else supportive, and that doesn't bother me- I just smile, wave, and keep going. I try to keep in mind that now that I am a normal size most people are being complimentary and not intentionally making me feel frazzled, but like someone else said, I really don't think any woman enjoys being catcalled. If it is obnoxious, I ignore it, which then makes them mad and say rude things, which then makes me mad, and they better hope they are in a car and not on the street or I will spin around, jog on back, and give them a piece of my mind. So yes, agreed, yelling out your car window or any form of catcall is not only embarrassing, but it makes me feel unsafe, which is not always a logical feeling, but it's how I feel. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kindle 8,667 Posted January 30, 2016 @@stacyrg1 Pepper spray with dye..Not only does it burn, the dye will stay on the perpetrator for identification...Love it! http://www.amazon.com/SABRE-Red-Pepper-Spray-Strength/dp/B003BORC8A ] Forget pepper spray. Get bear spray. You will not need the dye for identification as they will be the blind ones being taken to the ER. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
toler48 120 Posted January 30, 2016 I put men that catcall into the same group as men that drive those huge jacked up trucks, and, I really feel sorry they have such itty-bitty penis's. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
4MRB4PHOTO 3,900 Posted January 30, 2016 (edited) ...Safety: Pepper spray with dye..Not only does it burn, the dye will stay on the perpetrator for identification...Love it! http://www.amazon.com/SABRE-Red-Pepper-Spray-Strength/dp/B003BORC8A ... It works. I saw a photo of the 3 most wanted men on the FBI's most wanted list: Edited January 30, 2016 by 4MRB4PHOTO Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OKCPirate 5,323 Posted February 2, 2016 I put men that catcall into the same group as men that drive those huge jacked up trucks, and, I really feel sorry they have such itty-bitty penis's. Ahh yes, the COMPENSATION factor. The more jacked up the truck, the more expensive the sports car, the smaller the dick. That's how they roll. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KristenVSG2014 1,872 Posted February 3, 2016 I put men that catcall into the same group as men that drive those huge jacked up trucks, and, I really feel sorry they have such itty-bitty penis's.Ahh yes, the COMPENSATION factor. The more jacked up the truck, the more expensive the sports car, the smaller the d**k. That's how they roll. Have you seen the episode of Impractical Jokers where Sal is trying to sell a new fragrance called Eau Ver Compensate? ???? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chrystee 838 Posted February 3, 2016 I don't get tired of men telling me I'm pretty tho.. that is nice! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites