You CAN lose too much

[NewSetOfCurves 1,553]

You have to remember that many of us bariatric weight loss patients lose our weight rapidly. Due to the high speed of our weight loss, our skin begins to sag and our faces look fallen. Now, everyone is different. There are so many factors that come into play with ones outcome (starting BMI, age, genetics, etc.), but you need to give your skin's elasticity time to catch up. My family would criticize me and mention that my face looked fallen. And, even now, when I look back at pictures of myself within the time frame of that first year post op--even past that first year--I can see what they are talking about. My face and neck looked sickly and tired. My turkey neck hung. I am now over 2 1/2 years out and I can honestly say that your skin will retract. It just takes time. So, even though your family's comments are hurtful--despite that they are coming from a good place--remember, they are seeing the after effects of rapid weight loss. Once you stabilize and your body begins to stabilize, you will start to look healthy again. I will say that I also began practicing facial expressions that a lady advised me on. There are a series of facial exercises that one can do to help "tone up" your face. Here is a website that has a few of them, but a quick search will reveal many more:

http://fitness.mercola.com/sites/fitness/archive/2010/05/18/the-best-exercises-for-your-facial-muscles-to-stay-looking-young.aspx

It is a long journey. As cliche as that word is, it is true. This is a process. A time consuming one at that. However, it is one that hopefully leads us to a better and longer lived quality of life.

[Mrs.Grace 9]

Can you see my profile picture? I ask because it's definitely not skin that is the issue. There's no turkey neck or hanging skin. It's bones. They are jarring to look at. Thankfully, my skin has been rather resilient.

[JamieLogical 8,697]

Yeah, when I saw @@NewSetOfCurves response, I felt like she clearly wasn't grasping the point of this thread. The OP didn't say a single word about loose skin. She talked about being at an underweight BMI and later posted that even eating high fat, high calorie foods like nuts wasn't showing on the scale. No idea where this skin subject came in.

[NewSetOfCurves 1,553]

@@Mrs.Grace, my apologies if I offended you. When you said...

It's just frustrating because I know I look bad, but the comments from family and friends are hurtful even though they mean well and are simply worried.

I related to the statement. Some family members and friends said that I looked sickly. When I look back at pics, my face does look fallen...again, due to the rapid weight loss. That was my experience and the experience of many others that I have known personally or met through here. I am sorry that I made the assumption that it was yours.

So, I guess you are right @@JamieLogical, I did not grasp the point. Instead I read too much into it.

[JamieLogical 8,697]

So, I guess you are right @@JamieLogical, I did not grasp the point. Instead I read too much into it.

No worries, I was just confused. There are a LOT of posts on this site about loose skin or about family/friends telling us we are "wasting away" or getting "too thin". This post is rare in that the sleever in question really is now at an underweight BMI and struggling to stop losing. So it's a pretty unique problem and I hope she can find a solution. It sounds likes she's not really getting much help from her doctor and surgeon!

[Mrs.Grace 9]

Sweet Jesus, I stepped on the scale this morning, and damned near fainted when it said 101.4. Weighed three times to make sure it was accurate and had my daughter check hers as well to make even more sure. I can't for the life of me figure out what the hell is going on. I'm eating!

Yesterday: Monster Musscle energy Protein shake for Breakfast, whopper Jr (the whole thing) for lunch, 2 1/2 Arby's cheesesticks for snack, Hershey's chocolate pie for snack, Checker's checker burger with cheese (minus the bun) and small fries for dinner. Plus I drank some Coke throughout the day, and I hate soda. I only drank it for the extra calories.

That's a whole lot of high fat, high calorie food. I don't exercise. I don't leave my bed! How is this possible?! It can't be a stricture or anything like that since I'm eating and keeping it down. This is just crazy.

[JamieLogical 8,697]

@@Mrs.Grace I really hope you can get your doctors to take you seriously and figure out what is going on. It's sad that you've had to resort to eating so horribly and still can't manage to put on any weight.

[Clementine Sky 708]

Have you had any blood work to check your thyroid levels? Since your surgeon isn't being as proactive perhaps seeing a reputable endocrinologist would be beneficial. It's possible that your weight loss could have thrown your system off balance, and you might have developed some endocrine issues that could be treated.

[Mrs.Grace 9]

I had tons of blood work run in October. CT scans of my abdomen and chest were done as well. I've been tested for leukemia, lymphoma, AIDS, etc. They couldn't find anything wrong.

The only thing I can figure is that I have been grieving intensly since August. My grandson was born at 22 weeks gestation. We spent 4 weeks living at the Ronald McDonald house so we could be with him at the NICU all the time. He survived 4 weeks. After we lost him, his mommy, our Brooke, went into a downward spiral. We ultimately lost her on Christmas night when her heart could no longer handle the pain. Since August, my weight loss has ramped up again. My hair also started falling out again in early December. The only thing I can figure is that the grief and all the hysterical crying has sent my metabolism into overdrive.

[KristenVSG2014 1,872]

Extreme stress and grieving can most definitely cause what you have. First, I am so sorry for the losses you've experienced. No parent should ever lose a child and you've lost a child and a grandchild in only a few months. Second, the only advice I have is to see a therapist and try to eat as much as physically possible until your weight climbs back into the healthy range. Try to pack as much healthy fat in as you can (think spoonfuls of Peanut Butter, handfuls of nuts, avocados, cheese, etc.)

Edited January 22, 2016 by KristenVSG2014

[JamieLogical 8,697]

@@Mrs.Grace I am so so sorry. I can't even fathom what you are going through. Now doubt it has been a shock to your system.

[Clementine Sky 708]

I am incredibly sorry for your devastating losses. Grief can have a profound impact on your body, and can definitely contribute to weight loss. In the grief support group I attended at my church there was a woman who lost a significant amount of weight without wanting to following the loss of her sons. She was also making an effort to eat, but despite that it was a struggle for her to not lose weight.

This is a brief article that gives an explanation of what can happen during bereavement or stress, and why it can cause weight loss:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/Dr.-Wendie-Trubow/grieving-and-health_b_3177737.html

[bellabloom 2,467]

Miss grace-

I'm only now seeing your posts and we are both struggling with losing too much weight. A couple things come to mind.

You are grieving and yes, that is definitely going to effect things. Stress will increase your metabolism and you may not be getting as many calories as you think. I'm so sorry for what you are going through. Just so sorry.

Are you tracking your calories with an app? I track mine daily and it's shocking how much I feel like I eat and how little I actually get. I can eat all day and still end up at 1000 calories. It's so different when our stomachs are this tiny. A little feels like a lot. Track your calories if you aren't.

Also, there is a thing called hyper metabolism. It's what can happen after a period of extreme dieting such as a weight loss phase post sleeve. When you do start eating again, your body can go into a rate of extremely high metabolism in order to rebuild lost muscle, hair and tissue from weight loss. Signs of this are excessive sweating and weight loss even with increased calories. If you do have this going on you'll need a dietitians help to manage it.

I suggest to see a dietician outside of your bariatric surgeon. Those ones are too used to teaching people how to loose weight.

Your weight is pretty low. We have the same BMI. And I know what it feels like and what the bones are like. I'm in California and trust me, people are almost never as thin as me on this coast!

I hope you can figure this out and I'll be following your posts. Hang in there.

[animallover1247 249]

After being overweight for all of my almost 33 years, my brain can't even process the concept of loosing too much weight

• @Sophie74656
• I feel the same way as you. When I see these posts of those who have lost too much weight, I have to chuckle because I've NEVER had that problem and I am 100% sure I likely never will. This is a concept that is completely foreign to me.

[bellabloom 2,467]

After being overweight for all of my almost 33 years, my brain can't even process the concept of loosing too much weight

• @Sophie74656
• I feel the same way as you. When I see these posts of those who have lost too much weight, I have to chuckle because I've NEVER had that problem and I am 100% sure I likely never will. This is a concept that is completely foreign to me.

Don't be so sure. I didn't think it would happen to me either.