Having second thoughts....

[L.o.v.e 36]

Well I've been doing tons of reading of success stories, horror stories, good advice bad advice the whole nine. I am stuck in a fork in the road I am really really starting to think I should not do this. Yes I love food I was a chef in training for crying out loud (years ago many many many years ago). Food isn't the reason I've put on weight however food is a comforter for me when I am stressed. I'm hate vomiting and I have other issues that's require me to eat like low blood sugar. How am I suppose to go through with this without tons of regrets? Oh geesh I was so sure until now....I need a good mentor or something somebody help!!

[FrankyG 1,450]

I was very ambivalent right up to the day of my surgery. I had tried all sorts of diets and pills and doctor-supervised programs over the years and nothing was helping long term. I had a horrible relationship with food and it was just getting worse and I was the highest weight I'd ever been by the time I went in for my first sleeve consult. I was experiencing weird issues with my feet and hands (tingling and numbness) and felt awful and gigantic and stopped being able to do things I'd loved because I was too tired or too fat to do them any more. I really didn't want to do the surgery.

But the fact was, I knew if I didn't do something - really make a drastic change - I would die early and the rest of my shortened life would be spent feeling tired, sad, full of self-loathing and getting progressively worse health-wise.

I didn't want that life. I wanted to get out and enjoy myself, be happy and go places and do things and be healthy. And I knew I could not do this without help. Permanent help I couldn't get around, or quit or ignore.

So I had the surgery.

And I do not regret it at all. I am getting my life back. I am getting me back. I like myself again and I can't even describe how wonderful that feels.

Only you can answer whether this is a good idea for your situation. No one can make this decision for you.

But you need to think about what you are saying to yourself too... don't fool yourself; your relationship with food IS the reason you're considering this surgery. You eat to avoid dealing with your feelings. Food has become more than just fuel for your body; it controls you, and masks pain/shame/anger/sadness - until you remove food as a comfort, you can't dig down and deal with those feelings and the reasons you feel them - you can't heal yourself.

You may need counseling throughout this process to help you process those feelings and help you to figure out what is causing them and deal with the situations that got you there, but the sleeve is a very effective tool for giving you back control over your eating and relationship with food.

If you have difficulties controlling the amount of food you eat (binging/portion control) and feelings of ravenous hunger, then the sleeve will help with this. It will give you at least a year or control on both portions and types of food and the hunger/cravings should lessen or even go away completely for quite some time. This allows you the breathing room to start relearning how to eat again - healthy, protein-dense meals that will be small portion sizes.

You will be able to eat anything eventually. But you may not want to eat things you loved after having relearned how to eat healthy foods/portion sizing. And you will be okay with this! It won't feel like a sad thing - you'll be happy you no longer are attracted to crummy foods or giant portions.

It may still be possible to eat crap foods and eventually regain, but the main "magic" about having this surgery is that you get the control back and can think and plan and make real progress towards a normal, active lifestyle that does not revolve around food. That can be very helpful for those of us that do use food for a reward/comfort (I am in that camp as well). It is extremely disorientating at first to not be able to go buy a cupcake or stop off at a restaurant to pick up something special when I'm super happy or super sad. But I have adjusted, and breaking that habit is very freeing.

I still love food, but I don't feel the need to smother myself with it any more. I don't eat my feelings; I enjoy food for what it is, and there is still room for occasional indulgences... just a whole lot less room overall and it is a pretty rare thing these days.

Another component is that you should feel like being more active as well as the weight drops away. Getting some exercise/activities that you enjoy and will do often is one of the other key components of being successful on this journey. So you also need to be aware that it will take effort in this area too - unless you already have hobbies that include sports or activities, you'll need to work hard here as well (I now love walking, biking, yoga and swimming - I had never really liked walking and never tried yoga, but I kept at it, and now I can't imagine my life without them).

It will take hard work mentally tho, so go into this knowing that you'll be working HARD at the brain reset at the same time as you are dropping the pounds.

But if you think you can do this, then it could change your life. And you will be so happy, and so proud and feel sooooo much better.

[L.o.v.e 36]

Thank you so much for responding. Your description is very similar to mine as far the health issues the only difference is I eat well most of the time when I eat bad there is no over indulge due to the fear of vomit because of the GERD I suffer from. I am an emotional eater more on the compulsive relieve side. When I can't figure something out I tend to eat sweets to calm my nerves. I have calmed down on that as well. The issue is even now I tend to forget to eat especially when under stressed. I also get super bored and tired of repetitive foods quickly so I am afraid I won't eat because I can't force myself to eat what I don't want. That could change. I think my biggest fear is failing...especially at something that's too hard yet too easy to mess up if that makes sense. I am scared of the what ifs which i believe is normal. I also think I'm in this position because I'm alone in this journey I don't really have anybody I can talk to on the regular. The one person that I do she's turning everything into a fear situation for me.

[joannct1 59]

My best advice to you hon ignore tbe negativity. Alot of it, is because , they did not do what tbey were suppossed to do, i am age 57 lost 105 pounds maybe 30 or so to go i was 258. i do low carb . But everyones journey is different, best thing i ever done!!! I am off Insulin. Blood Pressure med. And Cholesterol med, i am 5"2. I also Take Armour Thyroid 60 mgs Daily .i. am Hypothyroid. I have sleep apnea which i hope soon to. Get rid of the cpap for sleep apnea, i never Regret my surgery, i will never ruin it. Its a new mind set and a whole new life style. We are worth it!!!! I am on Facebook you ever want to know more Jo Ann Cooper Troupe. God Bless You!!!

[joannct1 59]

I had my own doubts look up Dr Duc vuong hes a sleeve surgeon in Texas and Dr Guillermo Alveraz in New mexico. Do a lot of the positive you tube videos skip the negative ones!!!! i am 7 months sleeve. No complications. No regrets!!!! yes i nearly cancelled my surgery too, glad i did not!!!!! i have a life and health, i am now 153 size 16 i was a 3x i was diabetic. I used a cain sometimes a walker!!! no way to live!!! lifes to short to remain obese. But you got to get in a positive mind set. Ignore negative jealous people!!!! i still have struggles sweets. Which i use sugar free and low carb. This girls committed!!! you. Can do it too !!!! its so very worth it. I prayed a lot about it, i prayed before my surgery, i have a deep faith in God!!! good Luck!

[joannct1 59]

You will u til later out have good and rough days. Find a good support group like here, i am in several on fbook. Also look up Cindy virdin on you tube ,shes awesome!!!!

[joannct1 59]

I might have her name wrong virden and also cindy Lopez. Shes got a daughter Felicia whos in a lots of her you tube videos..

I have been blessed with tons of support family and online.

[hellos 19]

I too had second thoughts about my sleeve. The more I read the more I was confused and unsure about making the right decision. I just keep coming back to feeling like if I didn't do this then what. I knew I would keep gaining weight and feeling like I should have taken the chance to be thin and happy.

I had my surgery on December 14th and so far I have felt everything from happiness to sadness . I have read that it is normal to have these feelings at first. I will feel better about my decision once I can really eat normal food.< /p>

But! There is nothing better than seeing the weight come off and your body looking good!! Take a chance on yourself, I don't think u will regret it.

[L.o.v.e 36]

Thank you all for so much love and positivity I definitely feel a lot better after reading you'lls comments! It's a journey just like everything else. I appreciate each and every one of you! ❤️❤️❤️ I'm surviving PCOS, motherhood and Detroit I'm sure I can survive this!

[joannct1 59]

The sleeve is so worth it!!!! the Emotions are up and down., i am glad you had your surgery. I eat low carb, we are not supposed to eat the old ways. But our journeys are all different. God bless in your Journey!! Happy New Year!!

[joannct1 59]

And positive is the only people to be around, i am on Facebook, Jo Ann Cooper Troupe, i am 7 months post op 105 pounds off hopefully 30 pounds to lose..

I am happy for you xxxxxxx

[L.o.v.e 36]

I haven't had it yet love but my last appointment is the 6th then they will submit my info to the insurance company. I'm guess Feb or March I will have it. Right now my biggest task is getting my deductible spent so I don't have to pay full price for the surgery. Everything I have passed and got the okay on.

[joannct1 59]

Keep me posted you can do it!!!!! its so worth it!!!!

[L.o.v.e 36]

The sleeve is so worth it!!!! the Emotions are up and down., i am glad you had your surgery. I eat low carb, we are not supposed to eat the old ways. But our journeys are all different. God bless in your Journey!! Happy New Year!!

Thanks doll and same to you

I will how are you?

[joannct1 59]

I am doing well . Hope you are as well i am down to 147 . From 258. Almost 8 months post op!!! sleeve.