Husband or significant other help

[dmulkey 0]

My wife is going to have the LB surgery in 2 weeks. Are there ANY mates or significant other posts about what to expect as an LB care provider? This is going to change BOTH of our lives. How can I prepare to make her more comfortable?

We're both a little (very) nervous.

ANy help would be obliged.

[Jachut 487]

All I've required is the support I'd want in any other venture of my life.

It wasnt a very big op to get over, in fact my DH went fishing for 9 days about a week after I'd had my op, lol. I was fine on my own with 3 kids.

And our family lifestyle hasnt changed a lot - nor has our diet, it was always good. I dont avoid foods, I dont "diet" so we eat what we've always eaten only I eat less of it. I really had a problem with Portion Control but I guess we do eat less takeaway and stodgy Pasta dinners than we used to, but still normal family fare.

If anything, I guess its my passion for running that's affected my DH, he's now exercising quite regularly too although he's frustrated that he just cant keep up with me - he's a little overweight himself and would have to lose a bit to hope to get as fit as I am, but not having a band himself, its not so easy for him.

Weight loss is a personal journey when it comes right down to it. Its really great to have your loved ones supporting you, but you have to do it for yourself. So I guess as the non banded one of a partnership, just be prepared to be loving, supportive and answer right when she asks "does my bum look big in this?".

[TerriDoodle 6]

I agree with everything Jacqui has said but would like to add a couple of things. After your wife has adjusted to her new way of eating (which doesn't take long) she may be quite 'amazed'....even a bit disgusted....by the amount of food that un-banded people can put on their plates and actually injest!! It's like watching people eat a huge Thanksgiving dinner every single meal. My husband is about 25# overweight and would like to lose it. So I find myself suggesting to him all the time to reduce his portions and slow down his eating!! I'm sure he's getting pretty tired of it! LOL

The other thing is to mention that it is quite normal to have some feelings of depression around 3 weeks after banding. It has something to do with the sudden weight loss that you experience in those first few weeks and the release of estrogen stored in the now-melting fat cells. There's a hormonal imbalance for awhile....kind of like PMS.

As Jacqui said, all in all it's not such a big adjustment for the family. The best thing you can do in the way of support is to encourage her, be proud of her and tell her how absolutely MARVELOUS she is looking! :car:

Good luck to you both!

[Band Chick 3]

How sweet! Good for you! Good hubbies make me smile

My hubby needs to lose a bit of weight so he is going to do the liquid pre and post op diets with me. He plans on working from home and taking care of the kids after I get home from surgery.

With the long-term changes, I run the household as far as food and meals go. So, I'm sure this will change how I plan, shop and cook for the family. Hubby is hoping this will help him lose weight without having to get banded also.

You obviously care. Just be there for her and educate yourself as much as possible by reading any and every post here. This board is SOOOO educational!

Best wishes!

[MyKdsDad 1]

Let's see......crying jags! Pains from not eating, eating too much, indigestion....messed up periods, no periods, 18 months of periods (my wife had some tumors and they started acting up the day of her surgery). Try not to be the food POLICE, but it's hard. Be prepared to make several trips out to "find" her something that she can eat. And then watch her throw it away because she can't. Watch her eat all of the wrong things with no problem and not be able to eat any of the right things (go figure). Let her buy new clothes...or...watch her wear the same old things until someone asks her what she did with the truck load of ragpickers she use to have in her caboose. And then she STILL refuses to buy any NEW clothes. Most of all, just be there...a hand to hold and a shoulder to cry on. Someone to support her decision and protect her from the ones that would "hurt" her. You know.......SUPERMAN.

[Big As Life 0]

I don't think you will have any problems...you are already concerned about what you can do for her...that tells me you are a caring huband ....and that is all she needs...good luck to the both of you...let us know how things are going...

[dmulkey 0]

We're in the 2 week prep stage. SHe is on the liquid diet on day 2 and so far so good. However, she has threatend to eat ME! Which (of course) were properly placed nibbles about my person and jokes about how HUNGRY she really was.

We STILL have 12 days to go. IS she going to go crazy not having solid food in the next 12 days?

Is there something I can prepare for?

[tkpreston86 1]

be paticiant brother....i still forget sometimes....try and do it with her...when we go out and eat we share meals now...makes it better for me aswell and a whole lot cheaper....just be their it will be hard but your married that can be hard too.