Hello!

[wlscanise 3]

Hello everyone????. Question??? Have you told many about the surgery you're going to have or had? Or did you keep it private?

[mark1733 224]

I posted it on my Facebook. Kinda glad I did. I don't have the what happened to you questions. And honestly I couldn't explain a 110 pound weight loss. I think people will figure it out anyway. Guys are a little bit different tho lol

[Djmohr 6,965]

I told just a handful of people that I trusted. My hubby, my grown sons and 2 of my closest friends. Then after I had surgery I have pretty much told anyone who has asked me how I have lost all my weight.

I also have thick skin and a big mouth so anyone that would dare say something rude would get my rude self right back. I really truly don't care what people think. I know this surgery saved my life and I am proud to say how I have done it. With a lot of very very hard work on my part.

The reason I kept it smaller to begin with was because I had a lot of hoops to jump through and at any point could have been denied. I did not want to tell people at that stage in case it did not happen. Once I was approved and had a date I really did not care who knew.

If you do share prepare yourself for all the people who knew someone 10 years ago and failed because believe me everyone will tell you about the horror stories.

Just remember that you are 100 percent in control of your success as well as your failure. If you follow the plan you won't have issues.

Good luck to you!

[NaomiAus 104]

I've told everyone, I am glad I did, I have had nothing but support from everyone. It is a really personal decision to tell people or not. If you tell people, then you can have an amazing support system. If you choose not to tell people, it isn't their business to know anyway. There isn't a right or wrong answer on whether or not to tell people.

[pink22 30]

I took Naomi's approach as well - I'm telling everyone I see regularly. I figure that they will see me losing weight and I would rather be in the open about it. I am treating my obesity as a disease and my recovery as an important step in regaining my health.

Really the only negative feedback I have had was from my best friend, my dad and my sister. I think they are worried more than anything. While on a hike I mentioned that I wanted to stop for an ice cream on the way home because I might not be able to eat it again after surgery. My best friend snapped and suggested I do a bit more research before taking such a drastic step. I realized she was processing things in her own way and was afraid for me. I explained all of the research I have done, the fact that it has berm a decision which was a long time coming and that everyone is different after surgery and that I may not be able to tolerate certain foods in the future. This helped a lot and since then things have been a lot easier.

I suspect my dad and sister are a little bit annoyed I am ruining their Christmas. I have not taken the same time to educate them because quite frankly it is my body and my life. They have not been very supportive - they have grudgingly offered to look after my dog, drop me off at hospital etc. It is ironic because my dad has spent my whole life bugging me about my weight and my sister is also obese so she has her own issues and may not want me to be taking this drastic step because she will have to look more deeply at her own circumstances.

Rather than dwell on their behaviour I am setting up a support system of my friends.

Ultimately everyone else has been extremely supportive.

[miiasan 370]

I didn't tell many people before surgery. Before surgery I didn't want any negative comments about the surgery (because I had done my research and was positive this surgery was the best for me) and if I got one I pretty well avoided that person until after surgery. The one lady who was negative before surgery had had the surgery but has since regained all her weight. She came back to me a few weeks after surgery and apologized. She realized that the surgery hadn't worked for her because she had not made a commitment to the change in lifestyle that we all must make.

I lost 30 lbs before surgery and since surgery have lost 20 more. It is really noticeable in my face more than anywhere else. I do have people ask me now and I tell them. I focus mainly on why I had the surgery - which was to get rid of my co-morbidities and to have a longer healthier life. People have understood that and we move on.

Having this surgery was an important personal one for me and I won't let anyone take that good feeling about the decision away from me.

Whether you tell others or not is totally up to you. I think, though, as you lose weight people are bound to recognize it and at least comment or ask about it. Thinking about how you are going to respond is probably a good idea.

[dayciavu 26]

I have told the people that I am closest to and they are all supportive. I haven't made it known to the world but I will be honest if someone does ask how I lost the weight. My husband on the other hand had told everyone, seems like it, about my surgery. Some of it was necessary to get the ok for vacation from work. He coukdnt keep a secret if his life depended on it lol

[jlrandal 5]

Initially, I only told my husband, family and a coworker who had the surgery. Once I was approved for surgery, I slowly started telling others. I have been fortunate to get nothing but support!

[JengaBee 38]

Only my husband and my mom, who will be watching my kids. I feel like if I tell other family and friends before the surgery I will feel like I have to "convince"them that it's the right thing for me. Plus most of my family is pretty thin and aren't very understanding about weight issues. The last thing I want is negative reactions to my decision or them suggesting I give diet and exercise a try first...as if I haven't.

[Dawn42smith 7]

Only my family and a coworker who is also going to have the surgery. To many people just don't get it. They think this is the easy way out. But nothing can be farther from the truth. I don't want to hear all the na Sayers opinions on the matter. I've done the research and know this is the right choice for me.

[newmebithebypass 713]

im still pre-op but so far i have told my hubbys entire family and some close friends and my dad and thats it everyone has been supportive but that was when i was considering sleeve now that i have decided on bypass only my hubby knows and i think it will stay that way for a couple of weeks until i can meet with my nutritionist and get a solid plan for nutrition after the surgery so i can reassure my loved ones

[NovaL 41]

Hey, Pre-op here. Nobody knows about mine apart from my mum and best friend. I'm only 21 and our generation is so critical as well as judgemental. So for sanity's sake I've decided to keep it to myself and the two people I trust most. Just a preference x

[sarahb309 69]

I am just starting my journey, but am trying to keep it to myself... Now I have a twin who's also getting the surgery and she wants to tell everyone.... Tough situation????

[CHM 1,009]

The only person outside of my medical team who knows is my husband. I do kind of want to tell our mothers, but I don't trust my mother to react positively, and I don't trust his mother to keep it to herself. I've been on the receiving end of "I'm not supposed to say anything, but..." enough times to know not to say anything until I'm ready for EVERYONE to know. The thing is, I know I'm on the impressionable side and rather sensitive to negativity. I've considered surgery casually for years before spending the last year considering it very seriously and researching as much as I could before I asked for a referral. I'm certain this is what is best for me, and I don't want to give anyone the opportunity to get in my head.

At first I'd said I would share the news once I had a surgery date and it was 'real', but now that its getting close I'm still not ready. My insurance required 3 months on a weight loss plan, so everyone already knows I've been dieting, they just don't know the full reason behind it. Maybe I'll ride that wave as long as I can. Or maybe I'll share the day before surgery. I don't intend to blatantly lie at any point - if someone outright asks me I'll tell them - but for now it still feels very private and personal and I'm just not ready.

[NovaL 41]

That does sound tough but it is your life and if you feel as though keeping it private will protect you then I would say keep it going especially if you are unsure about what the response would be. At least people know you've been dieting which is a step, so shouldn't come as too much of a shock. See how it goes, your progress and the feedback you receive and just go with it from there and if you do tell either of your parents just make them aware it's what you see best.