Living with this long term

[bellabloom 2,467]

.

Edited May 20, 2016 by bellabloom

[Daisee68 2,493]

So sorry you are struggling. I agree that some days I really wonder how this will be long term and really am beginning to understand that I didn't really fully understand the ramifications when I went through with it. I am thrilled to have lost the weight but having had a stricture also, I totally get where you are coming from. I had my stricture dilated and was doing really well but got sick today after eating too fast or too much or whatever. It was not fun and brought back bad memories. I was "running behind" the average patient because of the stricture so although I am 6 months out, I am more like 4 months or so of the average patient. I am sorry you had to go so long as you were, but I just wanted to point out that you are running behind others because of your delay so it makes sense that this is all more difficult for you than the average patient 1 year out.

Here are some thoughts I have for you though - 1) are you seeing a GI dr? I wonder if possibly your dumping or pain is from something else not necessarily WLS related like I don't know - IBS, Crohn's, Gallbladder, etc? I am dealing with an issue that has me seeing a GI specialist so I thought I would throw it out there. 2) Are you actively seeing a therapist that deals with bariatric patients? I have followed your story and was heartbroken for you for you experience at the resident therapy, and I think you have been seeing someone for food addiction issues but what about one that deals with WLS patients? My therapist does this almost strictly so she is prepared to recognize some of the "normal" issues we go through as WLS patients (She called me out on something last week which I disagreed with and ticked me off at the time but a few days later, I could see she was right). She has truly been a God-send. I would not have survived this without her. Maybe find someone new if yours does not meet this description.

I don't know if you were really looking for advice or just needed to vent. (I tend to try to be a "fixer" which just like a man! ) So if you really were just needing to vent, then I want you to know I do get it and your feelings are valid. This is hard and you have every right to feel frustrated and exhausted given what you have been through! I wish you all the best! HUGS!

[magtart 603]

Aren't you suffering with Anorexia? I really hope you are seeing a therapist to deal with these issues.

[bellabloom 2,467]

Aren't you suffering with Anorexia? I really hope you are seeing a therapist to deal with these issues.

A therapist can't help me with the physical issues I'm having. My eating disorder is only compounded by these complications from my surgery. It's hard enough for me to eat emotionally as it is, I'm fighting that now and have upped my intake, which is bringing all these problems to the surface. I was avoiding eating altogether because of these physical issues and that's a huge part of why I slipped into anorexia.

Anorexia isn't just a mental problem, people can become anorexic because of physical problems too.

[liannatx 897]

Girl, go get that stricture dilated again! There is no need to be so limited and miserable if they can help alleviate some of the physical aspect of it. I cant imagine how miserable if what you do/can eat causes dumping.

and.... are you seeing a therapist? You sidestepped answering that, but I believe from prior posts that you are? If not, make sure that you aren't using the surgery/dumping to feed into the eating disorder. I think you look fabulous, but if you don't feel fabulous what is the point?

Edited November 29, 2015 by liannatx

[bellabloom 2,467]

Yes I'm still in eating disorder therapy. It's 8 hours a day every day. You could say I'm getting some therapy.

It's difficult to progress emotionally because I'm struggling so much physically.

I wasn't eating before much at all so now that I am eating more I'm seeing how sick physically I still am and how hard this is.

Edited November 29, 2015 by bellabloom

[liannatx 897]

Best wishes for you honey. I hope you find the balance, and enjoy this time we have.

[bellabloom 2,467]

So sorry you are struggling. I agree that some days I really wonder how this will be long term and really am beginning to understand that I didn't really fully understand the ramifications when I went through with it. I am thrilled to have lost the weight but having had a stricture also, I totally get where you are coming from. I had my stricture dilated and was doing really well but got sick today after eating too fast or too much or whatever. It was not fun and brought back bad memories. I was "running behind" the average patient because of the stricture so although I am 6 months out, I am more like 4 months or so of the average patient. I am sorry you had to go so long as you were, but I just wanted to point out that you are running behind others because of your delay so it makes sense that this is all more difficult for you than the average patient 1 year out.

Here are some thoughts I have for you though - 1) are you seeing a GI dr? I wonder if possibly your dumping or pain is from something else not necessarily WLS related like I don't know - IBS, Crohn's, Gallbladder, etc? I am dealing with an issue that has me seeing a GI specialist so I thought I would throw it out there. 2) Are you actively seeing a therapist that deals with bariatric patients? I have followed your story and was heartbroken for you for you experience at the resident therapy, and I think you have been seeing someone for food addiction issues but what about one that deals with WLS patients? My therapist does this almost strictly so she is prepared to recognize some of the "normal" issues we go through as WLS patients (She called me out on something last week which I disagreed with and ticked me off at the time but a few days later, I could see she was right). She has truly been a God-send. I would not have survived this without her. Maybe find someone new if yours does not meet this description.

I don't know if you were really looking for advice or just needed to vent. (I tend to try to be a "fixer" which just like a man! ) So if you really were just needing to vent, then I want you to know I do get it and your feelings are valid. This is hard and you have every right to feel frustrated and exhausted given what you have been through! I wish you all the best! HUGS!

Gosh I wish I could find a therapist that deals with bariatric patients!! The closest I've come is the nutritionist at my bariatric office. I'm dealing with my eating disorder therapist but it's hard as they specialize in emotional aspects rather than physical. And for me it's a combo.

I'm seeing my bariatric surgeon. He thinks I still have a stricture. I hope I don't have any other issues!!

I've already had 5 surgeries this year. Another dialation sounds so miserable to me. But I don't have a choice. I'm so tired of this all.

I'm just feeling like the worst bariatric patient ever ????

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

Keep working at this like you're doing -- on all fronts like you are. You are doing good. Progress (like weight loss) doesn't happen in a straight line. And it only stops when we stop. Obviously, you're not remotely close to stopping!

[James Marusek 5,244]

I am 30 months post op RNY. In the beginning I found it difficult to eat hard foods so I primarily consumed softer foods (chili and soups) for the first few years. But I would keep trying harder and harder foods and my ability to eat them improved in time. As advice - eat the foods that you can tolerate and every once and awhile experiment and try the ones that are difficult.

Your experience is not typical. It is like something else is going on.

After about the first year, your intestines should begin to change and you should begin to tolerate fats and sugars again and they should not lead to dumping. Around this time, I have let fats back into my diet but not sugars. Fats can take the form of whole milk instead of 2% milk, real butter, no lean cuts of meat. In general meals should consist of equal amounts of Protein, fats and carbs but always put Protein first.

[Daisee68 2,493]

@@bellabloom - oh how I wish you could see my therapist. Not only dies she specialize in bariatric patients, she is a recovering(ed) bulimic herself so she really gets food issues. I can ask her if she does phone consults or even can recommend someone in your area. Where do you live? Send me a PM if you prefer.

[thbrown223 214]

I'm feeling exhausted.

I considered posting this in the pre-op area but figured yeah, no ones going to pay attention anyhow. I wish there was a way to communicate how difficult this surgery can be that's helps people make a more educated choice about wether it's how they want to go. Because right now I'm not sure if I would do it again.

I'm dealing with so much adjustment and discomfort from my surgery. I had a terrible stricture for many months and now that has been dilated but now it looks like I need another dialtion because it still bothers me with anything dense like veggies and Protein.

It hurts every time I eat. This can't be normal can it? I sit there at the table in pain if the food is any thicker than mush. At least 20 minutes go by in pain before it subsides and I can eat some more.

I have to eat sooooo slowly. It takes me an hour to finish a meal, and if I don't chew and chew and chew, I vomit. And it hurts!

I'm hungry a lot now and I never seem to be satisfied because I can only eat so little, I never get that comfortably full feeling. If I do eat until I'm full, most often I vomit. It's so hard to tell!!

And I dump on soooo many foods. Any kind of sugar, even breads, any amount of milk or yogurt- I'll dump. I can't pinpoint exactly what's doing it but I dump almost every day, sometimes 2x a day. It makes me sick, weak and tired and I lay in bed afterwards exhausted.

I feel like I need to take out the carbs from my diet but I'm already struggling to eat enough to maintain my weight and I can't lose any more weight.

I struggle so much with the pacing, Portion Control, types of food, chewing, not drinking with meals, taking Vitamins, drinking enough Water. It's all so much more difficult than I thought it would be.

I'm a year out but I've only been eating solids for 2-3 months so it's like I'm new at all this. I feel exhausted and drained as I sit here dumping from a bowl of oatmeal, one of the only things that doesn't cause me pain when I eat.

I'm tired. I'm coming down off the high of losing all my weight and realizing I still feel as shitty as I did obese but only my appearance has changed.

Any advice anyone can offer would be greatly appreciated.

Awwwwww @bellabloom. ????

I'm sorry you've struggled so much. It's not suppose to be this way. You shouldn't be in this much pain. Almost a year out and only 2-3 months you can eat solid foods? Only then you're in pain.

I'm almost 2 months pre op. I'm still new at this and I've not experienced what you've shared. However I know this couldn't be completely normal for that amount of time you're in pain. My first thought is to ask had you considered consulting with another bariatric surgeon? Maybe they'd have other ideas to help you with being comfortable. I have now learned I no feel I live to eat, but rather eat to live. However it pains you, just to eat. That has to change. The feeling of discomfort and pain should have subsided a long time ago. I just thought another surgeon or nutritionist may have other ideas.

Edited November 29, 2015 by thbrown223

[talking mountain 26]

Bella, I just want to say I'm sorry for all you are going through. Hang in there and I hope you get some relief soon.

[jess9395 5,449]

So sorry you are having such struggles!!!! My thoughts and prayers are with you and your children. I really hope they can fix some of your physical issues, the mental ones are hard enough without being compounded.

[Djmohr 6,965]

Bella, I am so sorry that this continues for you. What you are experiencing is definitely not typical.

I definitely would go get that stricture taken care of. You deserve to be able to enjoy the little bit of food we can eat. Also, I cannot imagine feeling so crappy all the time.

Please try getting that stricture fixed. I am guessing your only being able to eat soft foods is also causing you to be hungry more frequently because they are simply sliding through.

I almost hate hate hate to say this but if getting the structure fixed does not help have you considered getting your surgery reversed? You cannot live like this forever with the physical issues and every once in a while there is the need for reversal.