Etiquette of posting in "[opposite sex] Only" forum?

[WLSResources/ClothingExch 3,444]

I skimmed the "Forum Rules," but spotted nothing that addresses my question.

Is it considered offensive or a shocking breach of etiquette at BariatricPal to post in a topic under a other-gender-only heading? I noticed one in the "Recent Topics" list (right side of screen) and, reading the posts, thought I'd like to make a few serious and light comments; the topic really is interesting not only in view of losing weight, but in societal terms, too.

Now the confession.... I did post, but not my primary comments. Mentioning that I had to go learn to use the "multi quote" feature, I also wrote that, if the participants told me not to come back, I would respect their choice and would also "unfollow" the topic.

What's the practice around here? Do the "one-gender-only" topics mean that the other gender is unwelcomed or does the designation simply indicate that the topic is of particular interest to the one gender?

Yes, I know that I'm over-thinking and perhaps even over-fretting this. So be it.

[BLERDgirl 6,417]

It's been my experience that they typically serve as a warning that this particular thread may be more closely related to a topic that pertains to a particular sex so enter at your own will. I've only seen one occasion where someone was asked not to participate.

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

I feel it's good manners not to post in the guys' room. (I'm a woman.)

But it's hard to tell (especially on the phone app) if you're in one of the gender-specific rooms.

Usually, everybody takes it in stride, especially if the "offender" hasn't realized she/he is in the "wrong" room. Everybody here's pretty nice.

But honestly, if someone wanted to invite everyone's take on things, they'd not have posted it in the men's or the women's room.

And yes, that was too many air quotes for good taste.

As always, others' opinions will vary from this.

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

It used to be we had a combo room that sometimes got a little risque. It was one of the funnest places to post on this forum, in my opinion.

However, some people didn't like it so the rules were changed and they were split. We are asked to refrain from posting (whether initiating or replying) to posts in the room of the opposite gender. The idea is that it gives a "safe" place for people to post & discuss intimate type subjects or to get input from their own gender. I can sorta see that but since these are PUBLIC FORUMS THAN ANYONE WITH WEB ACCESS CAN READ - it remains unclear to me how that is really all that "safe and private"

Fine, but it is annoying as all heck to post to what looks like a very normal thread, and not "see" the designation. This is especially true from my mobile devices, but even sometimes from my computer the "men only" thing doesn't show up. So then, somebody makes a remark about it and I go back and delete my post.

oh well

[ProudGrammy 8,322]

"one-gender-only" topics mean that the other gender is unwelcomed ?????

@@WLSResources/ClothingExch

I was yelled and kicked out of the Men's Room once

went to the wrong door

(meant to go to the Women's Room

i do think it's good to peak into the other get different perspectives

they do it to us don't they

if we didn't have men and women

there would never be any NEWBIES!

kathy

[KindaFamiliar 3,867]

they do it to us don't they

I can only speak for myself but yes, yes they (I) do!!

Sometimes I even reply...

I know it's naughty...

But I'm quite the rebel on occasion...

Plus, I have the advantage of chicks digging me...

So I tend to get away with stuff..

Kinda...

[WLSResources/ClothingExch 3,444]

Thanks for your input, Women. I guess I'll skip commenting in that topic. Really, it seems to me that it could have been a topic for the general population, but the originator had his reason for segregating it.

Since the topic was on the recent topics list, I can make my comments here. Originator was suggesting that men post before/after photos as women do. My serious thought was that it was a great idea. Photos of success can encourage others men who are earlier in their programs and there's nothing wrong with a boast now and then. The light comments would have been friendly retorts to a couple of the jokey responses. The only thing I saw in the topic that may be better left among the men is a was a word unknown to me. I'm sure I'm better off for not knowing its meaning.

KindaFamiliar, I see that you slipped in here. You took part in that topic, yes? If you value your life, do not tell me what the word means. Even if you didn't write it yourself, you're probably familiar with it. There are certain expressions that disgust me because they are freakish or dehumanizing or both.

[KindaFamiliar 3,867]

I've no idea what word you're referring to so I'm gonna go back and have a look...

[WLSResources/ClothingExch 3,444]

I've no idea what word you're referring to so I'm gonna go back and have a look...

Don't. Stay right where you are. I'm quite serious about not wanting to know.

[OKCPirate 5,323]

OK, just checking this wasn't the powder room. People do on occasion. I have two accidental posts in the powder room, and apologized and high tailed it out of there before Elode put me back in time out again.

Sometimes the discussion is such that it really is more neutral. No one can stop you from lurking. That's the price we pay. I think you asked nicely (thank you very much) and the guy who started the thread should respond.

[OKCPirate 5,323]

Thanks for your input, Women. I guess I'll skip commenting in that topic. Really, it seems to me that it could have been a topic for the general population, but the originator had his reason for segregating it.

Since the topic was on the recent topics list, I can make my comments here. Originator was suggesting that men post before/after photos as women do. My serious thought was that it was a great idea. Photos of success can encourage others men who are earlier in their programs and there's nothing wrong with a boast now and then. The light comments would have been friendly retorts to a couple of the jokey responses. The only thing I saw in the topic that may be better left among the men is a was a word unknown to me. I'm sure I'm better off for not knowing its meaning.

KindaFamiliar, I see that you slipped in here. You took part in that topic, yes? If you value your life, do not tell me what the word means. Even if you didn't write it yourself, you're probably familiar with it. There are certain expressions that disgust me because they are freakish or dehumanizing or both.

NOTE: There hopefully will be no full body shots in there but one never can tell...hey wait ladies, where are you all going?

[KindaFamiliar 3,867]

Too late...

I think I know the word to which you refer...

If that's the one, I can assure you that it should NOT cause any offense or angst...

One of the opinions given in the conversation is not necessarily the view I'd be taking, but that aside, there's certainly nothing there that should cause anyone to be troubled...

[WLSResources/ClothingExch 3,444]

NOTE: There hopefully will be no full body shots in there but one never can tell...hey wait ladies, where are you all going?

You surprise me, Pirate. Our acquaintanceship is new, but I know you well enough to wonder what took you so long to say that.

[OKCPirate 5,323]

NOTE: There hopefully will be no full body shots in there but one never can tell...hey wait ladies, where are you all going?

You surprise me, Pirate. Our acquaintanceship is new, but I know you well enough to wonder what took you so long to say that.

As I was wondering how long it would be until someone noticed that one

[WLSResources/ClothingExch 3,444]

Should or should not? Even if you meant "not," I'm wary. Maybe some day, when I'm older, I'll look it up.

I think I know the word to which you refer...

If that's the one, I can assure you that it should cause any offense or angst...

You're not so bad after all. I appreciate your "...to which you refer" and your not imposing the word on me.

------------------------------

Sheesh, sorry about that. It's impossible to edit a post which begins with a quote and have it remain intact after hitting "save changes."

I also seem genetically indisposed to responding to two or more posters in one shot. The multiquote button is way beyond me.

Edited October 20, 2015 by WLSResources/ClothingExch