Confused.com

[1212bella 4]

24 months ago I starting looking into WLS. And after 12 months of different appointment to talk over Lap bands and never felt comfortable with how quick I was told yes we can do a lap band, pay your deposit and you can be in next week. It felt like all the people I went to see was more interested in getting my cash than my health. I stopped looking into WLS and tried to diet determined I could do it.

So the story started again lost and gained. lost weight again then gained more than I started off with!

The final straw was three months ago when I was on a holiday in Sri Lanka and Dubai and I found myself deleting all the photos of myself because of the way I was looking. And also when swimming with dolphins I was to heavy for them to push. It was embarrassing in front of everyone. And From then I wouldn't take part in anything else. On top of being embarrassed was the Chubb rub! The pain and blistering from my thighs rubbing was painful. Now defeated and weighting nearly 200lb and a BMI 38 depressed I know it's time for change. I have found a surgeon I am happy and comfortable with and after meeting three times to talk over options and time to do research I have decided to go a head with a gastric sleeve instead of a lap band. Tomorrow I am booking my operation for 2nd November.

I am feeling mixed emotions on all kinds of levels. Happy I have made a choice and can move forward. And make the change I so want. Excited to final made a decision and getting help. Then Angry I have got to this size and not been able to lose the weight via diet and excises.

I am also questioning do I share this decision with family and friends or just keep it between myself and my partner!

I come from a family where everything evolves around food. And most of my socialising with friends is food or alcohol driven. My friend will be so supportive I know that. I am just not sure they will understand why I have choice to have WLS . My friends are all size 6 and never put weight on. Even after having children. when I have spoke to them in the past about my weight they think there doing good by tell me I don't need to loss weight and I am fabulous the way I am. I know there only trying to make me feel good. Every group has that one fat and funny friend. That's me!

Did you tell people right away?

Did having the WLS effect your friendships or social life ect?

[laguerr13 993]

You need to sit back and look at your final decision, something is wrong if the people you are going to are offering the lap band right away, I am an advocate against it, way too many negative reviews and factors, I believe a good surgeon would approach you with your goals in mind, and what you are willing to do, next they would offer several alternatives like bypass, and sleeve or even the new balloon, if everything clicked between you and your choice of bariatric group the next step would be testing and dietician visit, be weary of places that are "ready to go" finally this your journey and your decision as to who you want to share it with, there will be negative and positive comments but it is ultimately your health and life, don't go into this blindly, it is one of the hardest things I have ever done, but I have been rewarded well, and would not hesitate to do it again, I went with the sleeve after a long discussion with my surgeon, the band was too iffy and the bypass alters your entire system SO FOR ME, the sleeve was the safest and best alternative........ Your life, your decision!!!!

[BLERDgirl 6,417]

Make sure you are doing this for you. Be realistic n your expectations. I know skinny friends who get chubb rub. That' just the way some people are built. Know that you have to be committed to changing your way of eating & drinking. You entire relationship with food changes. I have a very active social life. I eat out frequently and a lot of my family gatherings revolve around food. I know that to be successful I cannot mindlessly eat. I enjoy social engagements, but I mind my portions. I do NOT diet. Exercise is also very important for continued success. I work out regularly and enjoy it. I have had nothing but support from everyone I have shared my surgery with. I haven't rushed and and volunteered the info, but if it came up in conversation I had no problem letting someone know I had surgery. It was important to me not to stigmatize WLS. We remove our tonsils when they get infected and cause us problems, this was same thing to me. I needed this surgery to work along with my weight loss efforts.

Keep in mind this is not a magic wand, but a tool that you can use to help you in your weight loss effort. Hard work is still required.

[Bufflehead 6,358]

All of my friends have been kind and supportive. I told my closest friends just about a week before surgery, and then gradually told others as it came up. The only person who was the slightest bit mean about it was a work colleague who is just a mean person sometimes. Anyway, I have to say that the slender folks among my friends and family were the most supportive and enthusiastic. Maybe because they really understand how much I was missing from life by being morbidly obese.

As far as being angry with yourself about not being able to lose weight by diet and exercise alone, let that go. Obesity is influenced by many more factors than just diet and exercise, and once you get there, it is almost impossible for anyone to reach a normal weight without surgery. This recent study looked at obese people trying to lose weight -- bariatric surgery patients excluded -- and found that the odds of attaining and maintaining a normal body weight were astronomically tiny, like maybe the same as being struck by lighting or something.

http://ajph.aphapublications.org/doi/full/10.2105/AJPH.2015.302773

In my opinion, if someone's medical team agrees that they are a good candidate for bariatric surgery, then that is probably the smartest thing to do. I don't kick myself for not being able to lose weight "on my own." I kick myself for trying, for decades, to do it without the best medical treatment and refusing to consider surgery.

Anyway, my social life has improved dramatically since I've lost weight. I'm more willing to go out and socialize and try new things. I enjoy talking to people instead of being focused on shoving food in my face. I'm still an introvert and always will be, but now I'm much more at ease in social settings and happier overall. That makes me a better friend.

Good luck to you!

[RILEYSMOM22 344]

I bet your comorbidities are the reason you were approved quickly, and since the band has failed, they had to go in anyway. How great to have it all done at once!