No confidentiality about posts on Bariatric Pal! Shows up on Google search

[B-52 7,113]

This is the internet....and you are dealing with strangers....let's face it, you really don't know who you are talking to. Even on this forum....I rread posts all the time and scratch my head if this person is for real or not.

No one here knows me, what I do for a living, etc, etc....and I don't know you.

When people here ask questions for advice to address a certain problem they are having, I will NEVER give an answer...I don't know you, have never met you, and have never done a proper workup-exam, don't know your full medical history, menatal status, etc.......so how in the world can I, or anyone else for that matter, give anyone an answer as to what their problem is????

I don't know whats worse...giving out affirmitive concrete answers or those who actually listen to a strangers medical advice....

I have been on this forum for years....and all I will ever do is tell someone what I have experienced, and remind them other people have different experiences, and the bottom line is that they should see their Dr. for a reliable answer.

This is the internet!!!!!

[SkinnyDown 409]

Very good points, everyone. I changed my name, and deleted all my photos. I changed/deleted a lot of my private information. I'm hoping to find a way to actually delete some of my old posts. I haven't figured that out yet. If anyone knows how I can delete all previous posts, I'd appreciate the information.

I don't normally have to worry about this privacy issue, because I nearly exclusively speak on voice, in all the places I am online. So there is no trail left behind, unless someone records what is being said. Which is usually always against TOS. Honestly, typing is so 1999. I haven't used a forum in many years! Which makes sense why I didn't think of my privacy.

I'll come back for information, if necessary, and keep track of my progress. It was nice to get to know some of you. I'm going to try to find a WLS support voice group. If I can't find one, I'll start one of my own! I'm industrious like that.

I appreciate this place for all the support I actually did get here. I was lucky to have the help I got when I needed it the most.

[VDB 800]

I have taken advice from several of you and deleted personal info on myself, to protect my privacy. In place of my smiling face is a nice fall tree up on the hill above my valley. You can still see the before and 4 months after photo, I figure if anyone wants to steal those photos, they are welcome to them. I am fully clothed!

I want to say, I do see this site as a support site. Support comes in many forms and frankly I get support from the comments of others. I love the humor, dislike any rudeness, and most of all I get a perspective about this new life of mine. And, it is a new life. I will shortly be at my hundred pounds down, I have never ever just had 60 more pounds to lose to my goal weight, since I finished high school.

I especially appreciate candor and strong opinions (you know who you are!). I just will not post anything I do not want to go public, and I am publicly saying I value this site and all of your support and information.

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

Good show!

We learn, we adapt, we grow.

[Nurse_Lenora 903]

VDB~ I think everyone at one time or another has had to come to terms with what they are comfortable sharing of themselves on the internet.

I deleted Facebook a few years ago and can honestly say I don't miss it or the lack of anonymity! There was a time in my life that I was completely fine with the "world" knowing my life but not any longer.

So I carefully choose what to share but never lie because there is nothing to be gained from lies.

[imsoglad56 402]

As far as I'm concerned, anything I ever say (or type) online, might as well be on a billboard somewhere for all the privacy I expect. Even if I'm on a site that claims to be private or like was mentioned above, has TOS that forbid recording, I assume anything I put out there is all publicly available. The only way for something to be kept private in this world is to keep it to yourself. Once you've shared it with ANYONE else, you no longer have control over where it goes. And when you deal with people online, you have no real way of knowing who they are or what motives they may have.

[umo 86]

If you keep your identifiable information private, you still can exist anonymously and contribute or get support from this page. The problem is if you use your real name, post your pics with your face or house in the background it will be easy for other to know who you are. The internet knows what you give to it.

You can use some smart precautions and sort of have some privacy.

--I would not use my real name

--I would not post pics of myself

--I would not give my date of birth

--I would use a special email for such sites

--I would not give the name of my insurance carrier

And I would still be able to share my journey with other freely imo

[SkinnyDown 409]

@@katybelle7 I'm right there with you. It's always about $, sadly. As someone clearly stated in an earlier post, this is not a support group. That's quite evident to me now.

[chasingpolaris321 214]

I'm so confused why anyone would think this is a private site. We all found it using a Google search, could read what was being said, and then decided to make usernames so that we could post. It's no different that making a username to comment on a New York Times article. Facebook is slightly more private because there are privacy settings, but even then Facebook owns your content and can use it as they please. Deleting your Facebook doesn't erase what you've posted there, it just disables you from posting more.

This site feels like a support group because we support each other, but the content has nothing to do with accessibility. My assumption is that BariatricPal wouldn't exist without advertising, because that's how they pay for the domain name and the servers needed to run a site this large. It's likely that companies who sell bariatric products do market research here. Hell, there are surgeons from Mexico with their own accounts who jump in offering to Skype with people. They aren't doing that because they're charitable, they're doing it because they want your business. Wikipedia, which we all know and love, exists on user donations, hence the lack of advertising.

My point is, there's no such thing as privacy on the Internet. With now regular security breaches leaking private information including credit card and social security numbers, we should really understand that privacy is something we can only expect by not sharing. If you're going to participate in the system, don't get all high and mighty about a site betraying you and reexamine your understanding of this site and any other site that you signed up to participate in.

Edited September 11, 2015 by chasingpolaris321

[chasingpolaris321 214]

Speaking of high and mighty...you sound pretty nasty yourself. Glad I'm protecting myself! Yikes!

I in no way meant to offend you or anyone else. Internet privacy is a really interesting and relevant topic, and my comments come from a place of concern that a site like BariatricPal or any of the others I mentioned are perceived as private. I do understand why they may appear so, but if you don't want to listen to me "rant and rave" as this thread is aptly named, I suggest you do your own research so that you can participate in online forums in a way that you feel comfortable with.

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

Alex Brecher, why isn't this private for the everyday Joe? I'm so disappointed. I thought the VIP thing gave extra stuff, never thinking privacy was one of those "stuffs." I have so appreciated the encouragement of others and having a chance to tell my own story, not realizing I could have just been posting on FB or Twitter for the world to see. You've betrayed the trust of everyone not willing to fill your pockets. I thought you were with us. Ha! I'm so mad I could spit!

If I knew how to delete posts, I would. I've deleted as much info as I can, wish I knew how to delete this whole account and fiasco!

Speaking of high and mighty...you sound pretty nasty yourself. Glad I'm protecting myself! Yikes!

Well, first of all ... here's the deal: This is the Internet. You should google what that means.

Also, on this message board all members are allowed to express themselves, as long as they follow the rules of the forum. And I think you just violated a forum rule with your name-calling.

Finally, I don't think this is the right place for you. You seem so fearful. Yet here you still are.

[OutsideMatchInside 10,166]

The kind of rude responses you got back in this post should clarify why you should never post anything personal here.

I was surprised when I started posting at the number of people with pictures and personal information, but in the age of social media oversharing I thought that was to be expected. It sucks that a lot of people thought this was a private forum. I know that some people access this site through the app.

Live and learn. You can't blame the site management for your lack of understanding on how the site works. Just be better about protecting yourself. If you use Facebook, there are some private facebook groups, but facebook isn't really private.

Good Luck

[BLERDgirl 6,417]

@ I agree. That does not seem like a support group to me, either. I pay for enough services online already. I assumed, foolishly, that this place would have been private. I have loved the group too, but unfortunately, there is always a price.

I'll take my responsibility for not checking.

I've been a member here a year now, and honestly, I think I got this. Any other help I really need, can come from my support team (NP, NUT, Therapist etc.) they do keep my information confidential.

The question is....if I delete my account will all my posts go with it? Or, do I have to manually delete each post, Thank goodness it's just 282 and not thousands!

This might be The Universe's way of telling me to get off my butt, and off the computer, and move on with life!

Deleting an online account does not make it disappear. If a hacker or any skilled computer savvy person wants your information, it can be retrieved. Rule of thumb is do not share anything online you would be ashamed or embarrassed if others found out about it.

[emma4884 81]

Case in point: member Thisisntprivate no longer has an account here. Yet his/her words are still here as they were quoted in another member's post.

Moral to myself is to follow @@umo's advice as shared earlier and to NEVER post something impulsively, albeit it in anger or despair.

[Thinside 155]

I am stunned that anyone would think a public site on the internet would somehow be private!

A quick poll: How many of you found out about this site in the first place by Googling something related to WLS?

I know I did. And I'm SO grateful I found it! If it was private, I shudder to think how much knowledge and real peoples' experience I would not have access to!