Stupid things people say when they find out you've had surgery....

[trishrnyoung 18]

I had a fellow nurse friend say "If you would have had to pay for the surgery, you wouldn't have done it" And, "You are so lucky". Well I jumped through all the hoops to have this surgery paid for and who says I wouldn't have had it done if I would have had to pay for it. And, luck has absolutely nothing to do with it. Everyone says she is just jealous because she weighs in excess of 370 lbs but she has the same options I did. Its a huge change of life and you have plenty of time to think about it while you wait it out and go to all the classes. They don't make it easy to have done if you have insurance so be proud of your decision. I am. It was a choice that I made to live a longer life, off of a CPAP machine I hope, in, time. I am interested in how others have replied to these questions.

[katanne 215]

@@trishrnyoung - When my mom said the operation was dangerous, I told her it was actually less risky than the knee replacement she had had, and none of us tried to talk her out of it because it was something she really wanted and needed to do.

When my dad told me I just needed to stop eating so much, I told him that if I were able to do it with a full-size stomach, I would, but the reality is I can't. I have tried over and over again and I have never successfully kept the weight off. I need the sleeve as a tool to help me with Portion Control, and I don't think there's anything wrong with that.

He'd also said, "Why don't you get Botox while you're at it?" and I told him I wasn't doing it for vanity, I was doing it so I wouldn't die of a cerebral hemorrhage like my grandfather - he passed away at 42, and I am about to turn that age, and I have bad hypertension. Not looking great in the risk department.

[Stephielynn8 64]

People can be so uneducated and that just makes my head hurt!

[De fluff 59]

I have a friend tell me: you can loose the weight without surgery! And...Are you sure you wanna do this!? And...You won't be able to eat things you like now!! I also was told... You don't need the surgery!

Your not big enough for the surgery!

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[trishrnyoung 18]

"If yad to pay for this out of your own pocket, you wouldn't do it.) Oh my gosh, you must realize that came from a person that weighed in excess of 100 lbs more than me.

[shellyd88 463]

I try not to respond to these kinds of remarks as I feel u can't explain it to those that never had the problem in the first place or in many cases those who don't wish to change so on the rare occasion that I even respond I say well I'm off meds I can walk bike etc that I couldn't do 200 lbs ago or those that make the easy way out comments I simply say well have the procedure and after you do in a few months we can revisit this conversation and u can tell me what u think is so easy about it... Funny they don't ever have anything more to say... To my face anyway

[LadyK44 263]

For me, I will only tell in my new town if it helps someone else. I workout. At work, they call me "The Workout Queen." I do not feel the need to talk about my WLS. My life my way! I am becoming healthier person. Life moving forward. I do not want the nasty remarks.

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[2tired2befat 29]

My personal favorite.....You really didn't look like you needed to lose that much weight. REALLY??? Were you blind?

I get that one alot. Just because I have a thin-ish face????

[2tired2befat 29]

I keep getting asked how much I've lost and how much I now weigh and what weight did I start at I've never told anyone except my husband and on here I'm just not comfortable answering it as these ppl fat shamed me and just want to know so they can gossip I won't tell I just say a lot and when they still say well I know but how much I repeat a lot and if they dare ask again I say it's not up for discussion it makes me nauseas that I'm past 6 months post op and it's all ppl want to talk about when they see me as if there are no other topics to discuss especially my sister and boss sister is " suddenly so proud of me for losing weight after all this time " apparently even though I've been a good person for 47 years cleaned up her messes time after time raised her child for 4 years helped her escape her abusive husband never been arrested held a job my entire life never in any trouble "finally" I'm worthy of her approval? Hmm was worthless when fat though and saved her ass so many times and never asked for or expected a damn thing in return yeah your welcome! Thank you for for condescending " approval"

Your kinfolk sound like mine.smh..stupidity and ungrateful people is a universal absolute.

[Icantbelieveit 955]

Why do people feel they have the right to ask how much do you weigh and how much you lost? That is like asking a man, so how big is your penis flaccid.....and then erect?

Way to personal. I'll just continue not to tell people. And just tell people that know me.....a lot to every question unt they know they will get no real details.

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[Lizardlady 90]

I am now 4 days post op but while I was in the hospital I had the dry heaves and nausea. My mom and sister talked on the phone and my mom told her I was nauseous. She said "Well get used to that! It'll be like that from now on!" (She is a nurse by the way).

Of course I'm nauseous! I just had a large chunk of my stomach removed and I'm on meds and just came out of anesthesia! Doesn't mean I'll be this way FOREVER!

[gina171 626]

I am amazed at people who look at me like I am crazy and say, "I don't think you're big enough to need that!"

5'4".....298 pounds.....no, I think I am maybe big enough, thx.

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[LolaSerena 12]

I haven't had it yet, but decided to get it. I can't wait to just say I cheated- so wtf are you going to about??? Hahaha cheated... Love it.

Lol i love this reply. Maybe I should use it if I ever tell anyone.

LS

[LolaSerena 12]

This is hilarious and I am thankful I only told my hubby, bestfriend, a cousin who wont say a word, and the lady who inspired me to do it because she had hers done. However, I did hear from my mother when I mentioned one time that I was debating on it. She said told me I could lose the weight by exercising and eating healthy. She also told me why didnt I just sew half of my mouth cause I eat too much. Before I got married she told me he would never marry me because I was fat and his parents wouldnt like me (BTW it was my second marriage and I was in my late 30s maybe early fortys and my husband was in his fifty's). When I started to lose weight on the preop diet she said "see you didnt really need surgery you just needed to eat healthy". Like I hadnt been eating organic for years now. I have heard her say surgery is the easy way out. Theres more but I think I better be done with my rant.

LS

[LolaSerena 12]

So to avoid uneducated comments I have decided to NOT inform certain people about my journey. For now Its my husband and kids(all for it, extremely supportive ), two best friends, and my insurance broker (she comes in handy) Who am I on the fence about and havent'told, my brothers and my parents. Why...........well, I can just hear it now. Everything everyone said in the above comments, and I don't need that now while I am trying to focus on myself for the first time in a long time. Sadly mom manages to make a situation that has nothing to do with her, about her. Don't get me wrong love her etc. but everyone elses situation magically becomes all about her. I do think my dad will be fine with it, I just am not ready. I need to stay mentally focused on what Im doing here. We all need to stay focused on ourselves. This is a major decision for all of us going through this. And the last thing we need are the nay sayers of the world giving us "mind frick" to shoot us down because of THEIR insecurities and failures. So for those who are just beginning this don't feel like you have to divulge everything about this, it is no ones business but your own.

Surgery date is Oct 12th!

I'll let you know how it goes if I do tell them

I wonder if our mothers are related. Lol

LS