Party with people who haven't seen me in many years

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

I went to a "reunion" of sorts - people who I worked with on a very big project about 15-18 years ago. I was a "young woman" in my 30s then, but due to obesity aged beyond my years. Now, we are all a little older, a little mellower and for me ALOT thinner.

I have been at goal since Feb 2013 so most people hardly remember what I looked like before - in fact somebody at the party mentioned that (I still work with her so she has seen me alot).

It was uncomfortable at times to get all the remarks, and I felt like my former 9retired) boss was uncomfortable around me (happened last time i saw him too, shortly after getting to goal). Since so many people post about being uncomforrtable about people noticing their weight loss, I thought i would share two specific stories that came up at this party.

First, a lady that has always been thin, beautiful, tall blah blah blah. She made comments about how she had seen my face in pictures, but never really got a look at my body and just went on and on about how much I have changed. The longer and louder she got, the more defensive I started to feel. I recognized it and made the decision to do what I decided in 2012/2013 about work colleagues - these are people that respected and included me even when i didn't feel I deserved it, so I am going to suffer through some of their current rudeness knowing they are just expressing alot of things they don't know how to express in the best way. It was like... deep breath.... I can get through this even when she said "I think you are about half the size you used to be!". I told her that was the truth, I lost about half my size which of course is an indirect way of giving people an idea how much you lost. But seriously, when you used to be in the 24W-32W size range and are now single digit sizing - it is not exactly a secret is it!?! I knew her intentions were good, this lady is also a horse rider and she never made me feel like I was too big to be involved with horses or any of those kinds of things. Anyway, it was difficult for me, but the end result was getting invited on a trip to Hawaii with her and a small group of "girls" that were on that same project! Why didn't she invite me before? Well, to be honest, because in the past i could be standoffish/separate myself from others and often refused invitations etc from work related people especially. I am thrilled to be going and they are thrilled to have me.

Second, the host of this event is a few years younger and was actually a single guy when I worked with him. Anyway, he is super outgoing/outrageous type of personality so he was really over the top vocal about how much I have changed. I could tell it was even making other people I work with (who are well over the shock) uncomfortable. Finally, one of the guys i work with said in response to his gushing about how different I look "yes M, you already said that". To which M replied, "but what i haven't said is not only do you look great from losing all that weight, you somehow turned out hot!" That got nods of approval and good laughs all around.

It was a boost for me as I am 10# over goal, and of course notice my waist isn't as small as it was a year ago etc but i am still doing great.

Moral of my story - well, there probably isn't one, but at least for me embracing other people's reactions to my epic physical transformation is part of my epic internal transformation. I have always felt I am a person with integrity, honesty, but this having to face stuff like this has forced me to dig deeper for a level of transparency and trust of others that isn't always comfortable. The thought that helps me alot is the knowledge that these SAME people accepted me, advocated for me, promoted me, respected me, worked with me and did alot of other great things even when I was morbidly obese (as they should of course!)

[IncredibleShrinkingMan 437]

Went to first (5-year) college reunion in 2011 at my peak weight (150+ lbs overweight) and I sort of regret it. Nobody said anything to me and most people acted like everything was just like they last saw me, so clearly I was recognizable. I still think to myself what those people could possibly have written to each other about me once we broke camp. I did catch one person whispering in another person's ear, but in retrospect I am surprised that didn't happen quite a bit more.

Anyhow, I am totally planning to go to 10-year in June, and I expect more people will speak their mind since it (hopefully) will be better news!