Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Recommended Posts

I've been telling people I'm having wls. Most are very supportive as they know my issues. But there are a few who treat me like I'm being lazy or extreme for getting it.

Then they go through the "it's all in your head" crap and that basically I don't need this and I should just suck it up and eat right (like I haven't tried).

Anyway I usually say it's for my diabetes. Which a lot of it is. It's frustrating though because I'm excited for this life change and want all the support I can get.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Some people will be supportive and some not. Some will be jealous and some won't care. Just know that is more about them and less about you.

Don't let the people who don't understand the surgery sway you or make you feel bad. They will be the ones who are negative the whole way through.

Keep your chin up and enjoy your journey to a healthier you. Good luck!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The people who say things like it's all in your head do not understand or believe that obesity is actually a disease. A disease that will kill you slowly and painfully.

Don't give those non supporters one second of your time, you won't change their minds. This is about you getting healthy.

Keep your eye on the prize! You don't need those people pulling you down. Leverage those that do support you.

Good luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Here is a marching cadence for you while you are out taking a walk:

I don't care what people say.

Gonna get my surgery anyway.

They're gonna get a big surprise,

When they see me go down in size.

Pounds off 1 - 2

Pounds off 3 - 4

Pounds off 1-2-3- 4

1 -2 - 3 -4!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You can always get support here. We understand. Try and talk more to those in your circle that support you. I didn't tell many people as I knew I'd get no support from some of my family. In fact I'd get the opposite. I was doing this no matter what they thought. My two daughters and husband are there any time I need a boost or a congratulations. You are doing what is right for you and your health and yes that diabetes should improve.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Its funny how the ones that usually make the negative comments are the ones who are the least informed. Try asking the "Negative Nellies " how many Dr. visits/ WLS seminars/ psychological and/or Nutrition appointments they've gone to !! Probably zero !! All you'll get is dead silence, and that's when you just smile and walk away. (Dumbass !!!!) Sorry, I couldn't help myself...................In my almost 4 yrs if being banded , ive only 2 negative comments. One was from a lady who had been through several cancer surgeries and thought I was crazy to volunteer to go under the knife ( understandable ), and the 2nd was a few weeks ago when a customer commented to me about my weight loss. She said in kind if a derogatory way, "Oh, but, you didn't have SURGERY, did you ? " When I calmly said, "yes 4 years ago I had Lapband to help me get healthy again. " She closed her mouth real quick ! And she was a little, Philippino woman, small boned, 5 ft tall , 110 lbs soaking wet ! Obviously, she had never had a weight problem in her life !! So for those that do feel the need to make negative comments about your health, tell them to stuff it until they are more informed. That is all. Good luck !!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The funny thing is I'm getting this mainly from a woman who was obese and recently lost 100lbs on weight watchers.

I tried to explain to her that her situation was different. She had been skinny and in shape her whole life until she had her kids. So this was the first diet she's ever done. I've NEVER been thin. Ever lol. I've been on tons of diets and I lose weight. I've done weight watchers and gotten down 50lbs. Then I always gain it back and more. Simple diet and exercise don't work for me.

Then I also added that I'm on insulin and have PCOS. Both inhibit weight loss. She still doesn't get it.

So I just told her I'm not doing it to lose weight at all. Just doing it to immediately reverse my diabetes.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have been vocal about getting sleeved, thinking that it might help others but I too am getting the looks & comments. By the way I haven't been yet. My surgery is Oct 13 & self pay. There are so many heavy people struggling with their weight issues, including me, & I thought this way they could approach me & we could help each other....or someone who knows someone would tell them that they know a girl who is going to do it....know what I mean? I was trying to be open about it coz I am not ashamed of it & hope that with me being open about it, it will make things easier for someone else...either in talking about theirs or looking into it for themselves...or telling someone they love, who needs help, about these new procedures like the sleeve...to help them....whatever....if I can help someone else & myself at the same time, then that is a win for me. I am pretty open like that, if it can help someone else, even tho sometimes I don't get the reaction I would like. There are so many many closed minded people out there that think they have all the answers. If we listen to people like that, we would never evolve in this world. We would still be clubbing each other over the head for a mate & living in caves. Instead we keep trying to make ourselves better & we shouldn't feel ashamed, or be shamed into hiding. Hopefully these new methods, or newer ones that will be discovered, will help our children so that they never have to suffer like we have with obesity & everything that comes with it...& if we hide what we are doing then we are just slowing down those wheels of progress. By speaking about what you are doing, being proud if it, losing that extra weight, you just might be saving a life or 2....just think of what people said to the Wright brothers when they said they would make a machine that could fly....or to Bell who said he was going to make it possible for people to talk to one another in different countries....all the shame & ridicule they had to endure ....BUT, look where society is today because of it....no we aren't the ones doing the research or the surgeries but WE are the billboards/results for those researchers & doctors....so hold your heads up high & do the best that you can by losing that excess weight...the heck with those idiots that think you did it the easy way (which it's not), or make derisive comments...remember, they are cavemen still...tell them to grow a brain & join the rest of the evolving human race! Sorry, but those kind of people PISS me off!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh & the woman that lost 100 pounds on WW? Different strokes for different folks...& let's see how long she keeps it off! I can write a book on a typewriter but why would I if I had a computer? Someone should tell her we have something BETTER now, lol. A tool that will help us that works better than WW. One we will have for the rest of our lives. Tell her to wake up to the new world. You don't have to knit a blanket after you have shorn your sheep & spun your wool...you can now purchase it online with a couple of keystrokes...sorry again, but I guess I am fed up with backwards people this weekend. I have a neighbour whose lawn was gorgeous. I asked him what he was using & he wouldn't tell me....so what happened? He went on vacation & the person who cut his lawn cut it too short...we had really hot days & voila....crappy lawn....its soooooo funny....now he's out there almost everyday trying to repair it, while he looks around to make sure people aren't seeing what he is applying...don't be like that person...if you can help someone by telling them how you are doing it, then do so....otherwise karma WILL come back to bite you, lmao

Lol...sorry about getting on my soap box....I'll get off now

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This is why I told very few people. Even some people in my family were not supportive.

I hope things go better for you. There is always the option to tell the woman you don't want to talk to her about weight loss anymore. Blunt, to the point, and honest. She doesn't get it, because she doesn't want to get it. Believe me, this is NOT the easy way out. But I was off 2 oral diabetes meds and 2 insulins by the time I left the hospital, 1 week after my surgery. That's a truth you can reverse your diabetes, that quickly.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That's why I never said anything to anybody....

When people asked me how did I loose so much weight, I simply tell them I eat like a normal person does, not a machine, not out to win eating contest.

And what I do eat, I concentrate on healthy, high Protein foods.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Morethanthis ? I like the way you think. I couldn't of said it better myself. And for the record, God bless those people who were successful with Weight Watchers, because my body wouldn't even respond to a year of that program, 12 lbs was all I lost. Tell Miss know it all that she's lucky her body did respond to diet and exercise, not all people s metabolism is the same anymore than everyone's sleep pattern is the same, etc......... (which explains why Im awake and writing this at 4:30 in the morning...............sigh.........goodnight. ............)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

B-52 I wish I hadn't told anyone and done what you did to be honest. But too late now.

I'm not letting her or anyone else get me down by the way. I'm beyond excited to get the surgery. I just get a little irritated at people who say "just eat better and exercise". And to hear it from someone who was overweight, is even more irritating.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@@Adrianabelle

Chances are that person who lost 100lbs is afraid every day of gaining it all back. The sad part is, she likely will.

I would like focus on yourself and don't even worry about others.

I remember when I told someone at work that I was going to be having WLS. I did not tell hardly anyone at work but this person and I were both obese. She I was in even worse shape that I. When she asked me why I was having it,

I explained that my medical situation was out of control and my kidneys were failing. I shared with her that my surgeon believed this surgery would put my kidney disease, type 2 diabetes my reflux, high cholesterol and apnea into remission.

She became very rude and said there is no such thing as a cure for those things, don't you think everybody would have WLS surgery if that is all it took? I worked another 4 months with her while doing my check ins before I got laid off. We never talked about it again. She has not seen me since and I don't communicate via social media where I am at with my weight loss or if I have even had it. Only a couple people who don't blab know.

In the fall, I am scheduled to visit the campus where I used to work. I cannot wait until I meet with those people who were closest to me. She will be there, I have a friend who will make sure of it. I am looking forward to walking in with my size 12 maybe 10 by then body.

Unless I am with my husband most people don't even recognize me. When I left, I was a size 26.

It should be fun!

The moral of the story is, you cannot tell people who don't wNt to hear, but you can show them later!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

DJ....too funny & bang on....as my brother said to me when I divorced...finally...from a very bad marriage...."the best way to get back at someone is to live the best life you can"....so true!!

Pink, mine was written in the wee hours of the morning too....if only we could sleep in the next day, lol....but the sun, responsibilities , work, wait for no one

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • rinabobina

      I would like to know what questions you wish you had asked prior to your duodenal switch surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×