Need help starting over

[jadrad7 0]

I am looking for advice to starting over. I had gained 20# back over the last year eating candy and icecream...i had no willpower, but i just found out i now have high blood pressure, so it was a wake up call to me to get back on track. all advice welcome. thanks:help:

[Angeleyes 1]

Get out your books you were given when you had surgery, read them all and then recomit to losing again. Pick a date and get going!

[juliegeraci 7]

I would first make sure you are at the right fill level. Second, I would take all those bad foods out of your house. You can do this. Just get back on track!

[JulieNYC 4]

Julie is right -- go get a fill, now! Then, once you're at your "sweet spot" if you can hang in there for about 3 days to detox from the carbs, you'll be amazed at how your cravings will almost disappear.

Run to your surgeon and get that band working! You can do it.

[Desiree1970 0]

You definately have to make a heartfelt commitment to yourself.

Don't beat yourself up- whatever you do.

Start with writing a letter to yourself that outlines a contract. Sign and date it and then mail it to yourself.

I did this and it helped me get over a different type of problem like what you're going through now.

Also remember to come here and get uplifted- there's wonderful people here.

Huggs- You'll be fine!

Desi

[christiana 0]

I am right there with ya! I haven't gained any weight back but I haven't been losing it either. I haven't lost weight in probably about 2 months and I know it's because I started eating ice cream and milk again! Grr... It's hard to get back on track but I know we can both do it!!!

[White06 0]

I am right here with ya!!!! I came on this site this morning just for some encouragement or something.....I havent lost in 3 months and I just had the surgery in Oct 06. Its all my fault..I am eating massive amounts of food. I went to my doc 3 weeks ago and he really got onto me, and wants me to come back Aug 1st. If I havent lost at least 4 lbs he is going to give me a fill. Which is wonderful except that Im so embarrased to go back with a gain instead of a loss.

He wants me to get to 140, and stop wasting time. But I cant quit eating, And havent exercised in 3 months. I cannot seem to get a hold on this thing.

I thought the lapband would solve all of my problems, but I wasnt prepared for the rest. I didnt realize how emational and addictive and OCD I am. Which I know is why Im overeating.

Anyway....I also want to know...how do you get restarted when you feel like such a failure?

[lizrbit 0]

break the cycle.

go out of town after your fill. go camping. buy a bicycle and ride to work and back each day. do something different and stop punishing yourself. find something active that you enjoy doing. Fishing, camping, mallwalking, hiking, biking, skating, buy a dog that will need walked daily. couple of times a day if you really love him.

You know this already. I know this already. do me a favor and remind me about doing this when i inevitably get stuck.

so...just stop typing, turn off your computer and go outside.

:car:

[OregonHolly 0]

Jadrad, I feel for you. I am in the "pre-band" stage, and of course your experience is what I fear most. Remember your energy and enthusiasm when you were pre-band? You have to recapture some of that. Are you attending any support groups? Keep on this board daily. Climb back into the saddle!

By reading this message board I found out that the band will not solve all my problems. (A bit of a letdown, gosh that magic bullet thing is so desirable.) I already know that I suck at self-discipline; if I were self disciplined I'd be thin already. So I have to think of the band as my partner in this, but we both have to participate to make it work. The band helps curb my ravenous appetite and I do the rest. Yikes! If it were second-nature to exercise with enthusiasm, pass up ice cream and candy, etc., we'd have never needed the band in the first place -- we'd have been "skinny" gals, no band required. It is a little of a disappointment that the band won't solve this difficult problem and life challenge, it won't change our true natures. One would think that having such a low caloric intake after getting the band would certainly result in lasting weight loss. It seems our bodies adjust to it though, perhaps slowing the metabolism to prevent starvation. It's a powerful tool though - and worth your effort to do your part....... make wiser choices in the kitchen, and get your body moving again.

From reading the boards, I have learned that our relationship with the band is like a partnership. It is a relationship that requires work and recommittment all the time. Have you made those partnerships with other people - your husband or kids or dear friends? I know you have. So make one with your band too. Renew your committment. Prepare yourself for the journey. Everyone has great ideas here for you! We all want to see you succeed. Try each suggestion and then hold yourself accountable to those who posted for you; write back and let them know if it helped.

Shame and self-pity are your worst enemies. You must banish them! Psalm 30:5 says "Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning." Don't give up.

Holly

[schel 0]

Hi Jared,

I copied and pasted this from another thread, I probably should have put here under support. I am going through this myself right now and have an idea of how you might be feeling right now. I am basically starting ALL over. Baby steps for me. I hope you can get back on track as well as hope I can get back on track I will start my morning with 2 glasses of H2o and at least 10 minutes on my Gazelle I just had to have and it now collects dust...

Keep me informed of how you are doing.

Schel

So here it is for you to read, what we said...

I need some advise...

Havn't been here in a long while... Banded in November 2005, and 5 fills total in my history of my band. Have an appointment next week to go for a fill, however am thinking of canceling for the 5th time now in 5 months.... Scared of my surgeon, scared to be scolded, scared to be told theres nothing else they can do for me... lost at first, and have gained all my weight back including 7 lbs...So I am above my presurgery weight. My last fill was June of 2006 and have not been back since. I do have restriction and even PB at times.

Scared to have a larger fill and not be able to eat only the bad stuff which goes down to well. What should I do? My mom thinks I should go in for the fill and said she would go with me for support. I really need some words of wisdom. Please be honest with me and tell me what you think.

Thank you.

Schel

And Cindilou29 said…

Schel, you're not going to like my answer but I think you need some tough love here.

You've got to get your head back in the game. If you eat junk, it doesn't matter what they do for you, you're going to gain it back. This is an opportunity for you to re-commit yourself to this band. Get the fill, tell them how you feel and talk to a nutritionist to get back on track. Really, you need to figure out why you don't want to use this tool that you have. There's a reason and only you know what it is. Do you really want to lose weight? There's something holding you back from achieving that weight loss.

You can PB and not be too tight. If you don't follow the rules (ie you eat too fast or take bites that are too large, etc) you're going to PB even if you have just a teeny bit of restriction.

Keep your appointment. If a fill is not right for you, then he won't do it but you owe it to yourself to give this another try. Tell him what you're feeling. Tell him your fears. Trust me, it won't be the first time he's heard it. And don't be afraid of a little scolding. I'm sorry to say this but maybe you need it.

Let your Mom go with you so you can lean on her for support. This won't be an easy thing but you have to do it. Did you go through all of this to give up now? You're stronger than that. You can do this, Schel. I know you can and more importantly, somewhere in there you know you can too. You never would have done the surgery if you didn't think you had it in you to succeed.

Please don't cancel the appointment again. You owe it to yourself to try to get back on track. Cut out the junk. If that's too hard, then just cut back. Every baby step is getting you closer to your goal. You just have to DO it.

Remember, a journey of 1000 miles begins with one single step. You can take one step, can't you? That's not overwhelming, right? Tomorrow, try to eat following the rules. If that's too much, eat one meal following the rules. Then the next day try for 2 meals.

YOU CAN DO THIS.

Keep us updated. You're in my thoughts and prayers.

And I said…

Thanks!

I will keep my appointment.

I think I just made my 1st right choice. Yesterday when at the store, my son was begging for cupcakes. So I gave in and this morning when I got up, what did I do? I grabbed them was going to open it up and pushed it away and came to the computer instead. Feels good that I did this, but the evil voice in my brain is still saying go eat it! Wish I could put a band around the evil voice in my head!

I will not put one bite of the cup cake in my mouth and will have a healthy Breakfast with my son this morning before going to work.

Thanks, I know this is just a baby step, and everyone here will be hearing from me a lot more as I need to get away from the food, I shall type type type!

Thanks.

Schel

[juliegeraci 7]

Schel, good job this a.m. Try and keep those red light foods out of the house. You can do this. One meal at a time.

[OregonHolly 0]

I say AMEN to that Jack. Lets leave the DISORDER behind. Great idea. Jadrad7, at first I thought "but there's so many people on the board who have the band and are struggling - what's the difference between that and just dieting? Why band at all?" but you know, I have to realize that EVERYONE on the board has failed at dieting, and yet MANY on the board are doing FANTASTIC, with changed lives. That makes it a statistical probability that we can succeed, that most will. Dieting without a tool, was just dieting. Apparently those who dieted during their "pre band insurance diet" didn't lose enough weight to say "woo hoo, I don't need the band, I'm cured!" We need the band. Period. Then we move forward and don't look back. We keep taking the next step in the right direction and keep doing the next right thing. That's all we need to do, just make our very next decision (like "hmmm, what's for dinner? " or "twinkies or half an egg?") the right decision. One decision at a time. Just one.

I'm giving you the high five and glad to be sharing the journey with you, and will all the fine folks on the board.