Secret sleever

[KnowUrWorth 17]

Hi guys just wondering if anyone else kept their surgery a 'secret'? I'm getting sleeved in 4 weeks and have so far only told my parents, my two brothers (and their partners) and one friend. I know I'm going to get a lot of questions from all other friends and family, so wondering if I should just make it something I tell everyone or keep to original plan of a secret.

Anyone else have any opinions on this or experienced this themselves?

[sonnysun 15]

I am having a really hard time deciding what to tell people. On one hand, I really don't want to lie to people and my coworkers are like family and they would ask where I was during the surgery and also how I was losing weight. I don't relish the idea of lying to them. Also, I know people who have had gastric bypass and lied about it and I think it's kind of unfair to other heavy people to just tell them you lost weight by diet and exercise because it is so frustrating when you're trying to do the same thing and they are having incredible results and you're not. That said, I would really rather not have everybody in my business. I am afraid I may gain the weight back, and I don't really want everyone to know that I had the surgery. It is just a fear I have. I haven't decided what I am going to do.

[thinner-me 160]

I am in the exact same boat. Some of my coworkers are like family also, but I'm not sure how they will handle this news and I don't want to hear it! Not sure what to say! I know they will be asking why I'm going to be off work.

[BestDayEver 418]

I personally think in the end it will be obvious to people that I've had WLS. So when asked about how I've lost weight, I say I've had surgery and I'm using this wonderful tool along with diet and exercise to lose weight. I think my smile says it all ????. And they can see that it's working.

[OutsideMatchInside 10,166]

@@KnowUrWorth

With the number of people you told, your sleeve isn't a secret or it won't be for long.

I told 3 people, none of them live near me and they all live in 3 different states and don't talk to each other or anyone else I know.

You can't untell people, so be careful who you do tell.

Also, remember when you tell people, they are going to want to talk about it when you may not want to, for the rest of your life.

[KnowUrWorth 17]

Thank you everyone for your input. I'm scared to tell people, and worried what negativity may come my way but I don't like feeling that I'm lying either.

Good point about other people feeling frustrated that I would do so well 'on my own' if they can't.

I have a lot to think about..

[Lilu 65]

Hi this is a choice you need to be comfortable with. I have only told the same people in my life every one else I told I had some made up problem. I don't regret it because I did not want people judging me or watch king me eat. I did not reach my goal in a year but am on a weight lost now. I have lost weight at a slow rate. I don't have much to lose but I didn't want any negative feed back from anyone. You are the only one who will know who to tell and who not to tell. I will pray that you get the sign you need to make that decision

[jmw1982 59]

I haven't told anyone. My mom should be my biggest support system but I've seen her reactions to people who have had WLS. I frequently travel so the time off wouldn't be questioned and have yoyo dieted for years, so I don't anticipate anyone questioning me when I start losing.

[NaomiAus 104]

I tell everyone, and if they don't like it they can go suck it, I'm doing it for me not them. That being said I have only had overwhelming support from people I've told.

It's up to you who you tell and if you tell people, there is no right answer, it is a very personal thing so it is completely understandable to not want to tell people.

Like other people said, if you are not wanting it to become public knowledge, be very careful with who you tell, you can't untell people

Edited August 12, 2015 by NaomiAus

[LuckyStar 24]

@KnowUrWorth I understand where you are coming from. Other than my mom and my BF no one knows and I intend on keeping it that way. There is no real reason to have to tell others. Of course there are times when we may feel that telling others will only help them, but at the moment we are here in this situation to care for ourselves and to get our lives on the right course. It seems telling others would be a relative and very selective process.

Edited August 12, 2015 by LuckyStar

[KnowUrWorth 17]

Thankyou! I have decided to just keep it to the people I've already told and that's all. I'm so excited to start this journey and not going to let this negative thoughts get in my way ????

[LuckyStar 24]

Thankyou! I have decided to just keep it to the people I've already told and that's all. I'm so excited to start this journey and not going to let this negative thoughts get in my way

@@KnowUrWorth, good for you. This is an exciting journey. And no time for negativity! Wishing you all the best in your journey.

[KnowUrWorth 17]

Thankyou Luckystar ????

[OKCPirate 5,323]

My answer is always "I eat less, move more" but to friends and acquaintances who are over weight who corner me, I explain about the surgery, the self pay options and this site. I am a bit of a evangelists about all three.

[dsheive 100]

Ok heres what I did...I sent it up like this.. I started talking about exercise and walking.. Then about seeing a nut.. Talked about food changes I was making.. Life changes etc.. No lie it was all happening.. I told one. Sister(she had wls) and 2 friends at work.. I had lots of apts(also true). Most of us have heart burn which also ulcerates our edphogus.. That is what I was out for.. Digestive issues(true? Yes).. They don't need to no all the details... When you lose the weight you have already set them up with the nut and exercise and with alot of help from nut team I'm not giving up now.