Husband having second thoughts

[larac05 41]

Hello! I have 3 weeks to go and then I will finish my 3 mo required nutritional counseling. My dr said I will likely have my surgery the end if Sept or first part of Oct. At first my husband was all for it and excited as I was. The past few days he has been telling me that he doesn't want me to have the surgery. He said today that I should just stick with the diet and exercise and I will loose weight that way. I reminded him that I have lost weight but it always comes back plus some. He said he is just nervous about such a drastic surgery. Any ideas to help put his mind at ease? I am excited and ready to go for it!

[Rose4 Life 19]

Mine is doing the same.

[lsmith715 55]

Wow!! This sounds like my life exactly! My husband goes back and forth. All I can say is just keep talking to him and give him time to get used to this. That's my plan. Good luck!

[francheskii 28]

Initially my husband felt the same way. Until I invited him to one of my classes and my doctor’s appointment. He was able to ask questions and then felt more at ease. He's my biggest supporter and I am very thankful. Maybe this is something you can do also. I also reminded him of the reason behind the surgery. Mine was diabetes. I had been on insulin for 12 years killing my pancreas. My surgery date was July 13th and today I was feeling depressed but this app and all the discussions have helped me immensely. Good luck with the hubs!

[Cervidae 2,389]

I think bringing him in to talk to the doctor would probably help him a lot. It is a drastic surgery, it is a drastic life change, but if it's what you need, it's all going to be worth it in the end. Sounds like he just really loves you and feels a perfectly understandable anxiety about the danger you'll be facing, though the chance of anything bad happening is probably a lot smaller than he thinks it is. I would also recommend sitting down with him and watching videos/reading blogs by people who are 6 months, a year, 5 years past this surgery. That helped me a lot when I felt fear or confusion about this whole process.

[larac05 41]

Thanks for the advise! I will definitely take him to next visit. I lost both parents within 3 years of each other. My dad was diabetic and high bp, he died of massive heat attack at 65 years old. My mom had high bp and died of colon cancer at the age of 63. Both were overweight and I cant help but think if they had taken control of their weight then they might still be here today. I do not want to put my kids through loosing me at a early age. That is my main thing that brought me to my decission. He knows that but I think he is just scared.

[Cervidae 2,389]

Well, it is scary. But it's also excited and amazing. So sorry to hear about your parents.

[KimDawn 45]

When I told my husband I wanted this, he didn't speak to me for 3 days and refused to go to the seminar. I told him that if he was concerned and had questions to research this with me.

He did attend the seminar and spoke with the doctors and others at the support group meetings. Now he is my biggest supporter and I don't think I could be successful without him.

He'll come around. He might just need more time and education/information.

Good luck to ya!