Depression, Anxiety and Anger

[angbutler0712 30]

I am 3.5 weeks out of surgery. Am I the only one that feels like I've gone bat sh*t crazy?? I have used food as a comfort for 30+ years.. I was also a smoker then converted to ecigs 2 yrs ago. On my day of surgery I lost my two best friends.. Food and nicotine. I know that sounds terrible, but I am having a hard time emotionally with this transition.

Some days I'll wake up so excited to see my progress and in the same minute hate that I can no longer go out to dinner with my family at our favorite restaurant.. I know the day will eventually come, but for now.. I have spiraled into a dark tunnel that feels impossible to get out of.

Is there anyone else who has gone through this? Im quick to lash out.. Quick to cry and just this overwhelming feeling of anger and guilt. Part of me wishes I didnt have the surgery..

I go for my 1 month check up next week and will be discussing this with my doctor.

Thanks for everyones on going support here. :-)

[WL WARRIOR 692]

These kind of thoughts and feelings are common during the first few months out. I went extreme (strong adherence to the rules, low calorie, low carb, no eating out, exercising everyday) for the first six months and then finally it all got better. This was not because I could eat more and go to restaurants, but because I got so use to the structure and routine that it became second nature.

So, my advice is to give it time. You said you lost your two best friends. Although they are not people, you may have to try and move on like they really were. When someone close to me passes away, it pisses me off to hear that it gets better with time. Because at that moment, the pain is real and its unimaginable how will your life could ever be the same without your "friends.". However, you learn strategies to help cope and have to reach out to others for support when you feel like you are losing it.

My best defenses are my CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy), OA (Overeaters Anonymous), and medication. I take Wellbutrin XR to ward off binging, food addiction, and depression. It's not a wonder drug, but seems to help.

[alisawoo22 13]

I share some similar feelings! I miss my comfort. I don't regret the surgery...not until I see for myself all the benefits it might hold.

I wish I could lock myself into a studio apartment for like the first 6 months because what I struggle the most with is cooking for my family still. - bless their hearts, I love them - but food is our enemy right now. So, making it, watching them induldge, even their compliments to the chef about how full they are makes me jealous. But - we do what we have to do. This was the right choice - you did it for a reason, be patient and all will prove itself.

Good luck!!

[hockeyfan7 249]

I share some similar feelings! I miss my comfort. I don't regret the surgery...not until I see for myself all the benefits it might hold.

I wish I could lock myself into a studio apartment for like the first 6 months because what I struggle the most with is cooking for my family still. - bless their hearts, I love them - but food is our enemy right now. So, making it, watching them induldge, even their compliments to the chef about how full they are makes me jealous. But - we do what we have to do. This was the right choice - you did it for a reason, be patient and all will prove itself.

Good luck!!

Alisawoo22 - I so agree with you on the family thing. This would be so much easier if it were only me in the house. I could only buy what I want and I wouldn't have to cook a family meal.

[tinab08 35]

Trust me your not the only one i did all the research i could before asked alot of questions but not once did anyone or any doctor talk about the depresion i was feeling it started from the first day i was in the hospital believe me i got hit hard with it noone to talk to about it i was really scared and yes ill say it i regretted having my sleeve but now 14 days out ive learned not to let myself be down and focus on the big prize i have lost 25 pounds in my first week just so u know it will get better best of luck

[jamielcosta 1]

My biggest complaint 2 days post op was, no one ever told me what mind games would happen from removing sugar from my diet! The withdrawal was terrible and made me very crabby. The next thing emotionally that happened to me was when I sat down to a beautifully prepared meal with my family and I had no emotion and could only eat 2oz of my dinner and felt no enjoyment. There are a lot of mind games here and when you suffer from severe depression you don't really need anymore mind games!

[alisawoo22 13]

Just keep going. Remind yourself every morning why you did this. Write it on your bathroom mirror and read it outloud. I've lost 37 lbs and I'm 2 weeks and 4 days out of surgery!! All you have is to move forward!

[eisorp 13]

Thankfully my surgeon had a required class for all patients and a packet we signed stating we read it- in it they talked about depression, regrets, social issues etc. - I knew what I was getting into and I'm now thrilled I did it- getting over that hump when you see the results will help...I also tell everyone what I did and thankfully most people are supportive and understand when I may pass on going out to dinner and meeting up afterwards for the movie ????hang in there it gets better and you'll be so happy!!

[Aireekah 2]

I am 3.5 weeks out of surgery. Am I the only one that feels like I've gone bat sh*t crazy?? I have used food as a comfort for 30+ years.. I was also a smoker then converted to ecigs 2 yrs ago. On my day of surgery I lost my two best friends.. Food and nicotine. I know that sounds terrible, but I am having a hard time emotionally with this transition.

Some days I'll wake up so excited to see my progress and in the same minute hate that I can no longer go out to dinner with my family at our favorite restaurant.. I know the day will eventually come, but for now.. I have spiraled into a dark tunnel that feels impossible to get out of.

Is there anyone else who has gone through this? Im quick to lash out.. Quick to cry and just this overwhelming feeling of anger and guilt. Part of me wishes I didnt have the surgery..

I go for my 1 month check up next week and will be discussing this with my doctor.

Thanks for everyones on going support here. :-)

Omg. I feel the exact same thing. Tomorrow I'll be a week post-op and I'm usually a strong and optimistic woman. I was that way before the surgery and right after. I think even yesterday! But today just turned cloudy on me. I feel angry that I had to go to these extremes for weight loss, angry that I can't eat what I want, guilty for having modified my body like this. Just so many emotions. Yes I know the results will come, this is the best decision I could have made for my health, etc. but at this very moment I am just feeling blue! ????

[choosehope 233]

WLWarrior - which surgery did you have? Did you have any trouble staying on or taking your Wellbutrin XR?

[jamielcosta 1]

I am challenging the function of the Wellbutrin XR, I do not think my stomach can process the meds the same, or I am pooping them out before they can work. Sorry for TMI... Why am I still miserable I just lost 35 pounds????

[jenlynh 0]

Thank you for posting this. I was sleeved on 6/2/2015 and I've been experiencing severe irritability, depression, mood swings and am often tearful. I feel like I don't have control of my emotions anymore and i feel like I've been downright volatile. I'm praying this goes away as I have a history of depression but this feels different if that makes sense. This feels like PMS from hell.

[WL WARRIOR 692]

I had the gastric sleeve. One of the reasons I chose this surgery was so my meds could be absorbed fully. I had no trouble taking the Wellbutrin before, during, and after surgery.

[AlphaB 28]

I thought you meant that the day of your surgery your 2 best friends died. One because of too much food and the other to lung cancer. Then I read someone's reply and understood what you meant.

[dstined4gr8tnes 65]

I never realized that so much socialization was done around food until I had my surgery. From pot.lucks at work to happy hour with friends. I was extremely depressed after my surgery when ever food was the center of the event. In fact I had my surgery in may so the entire summer cook out events we a no go. I felt like I was isolating myself and those around me appeared to be annoyed by my constant 4 ounce rules. Either way, I am 2 years out and after about 5 months life became a lot better. I don't know what happened with your friends but if they are real that can be repaired or you will definitely gain new ones. But as for food and cigarettes - which I had to give up also...i understand and you will make it.through I promise. Congrats on your progress and good luck!!!!