Worst things people have said to you or behind your back regarding surgery

[Nickkibear24 33]

So today my "family" tells me that they have been talking about me and discussing my surgery. My "mother" (who is a f****** stick figure) says "Monique i really don't think this surgery is a good idea for you. this surgery is for bigger people." Exactly how much bigger would you like me to get? My dad who like me is prior military says why don't you just go for a 4-5 mile run every morning. Um maybe because the feeling of my knee popping out of place is freaking painful. I told him I walk every day 2-4 miles and that doesn't include the stairs im constantly doing. Everyone in my "family is telling me im taking the easy way out. I've told them already that this is happening whether they like it or not so they can hop on board or get the heck out of my way. But my whole family is skinny so they dont understand what its like being this big and uncomfortable in your own skin. My sister says she does because she's had 2 kids but I simply called her an idiot and walked away. Right after each pregnancy she went right back down to a size 0 and she eats significantly more than I do. Ugh how do you keep relationships and get healthy any advice.

[jenjen2781 30]

@nickibear24 sorry you have no support. I am to shamed to tell anyone other than my mom, husband and sister. This is your life and your health. Keep pushing forward and after its all said and done they happy for you. When is ur surgery?

[Babbs 14,681]

Have the surgery, change your lifestyle to healthy eating and exercise, and just smile when all the compliments come rolling in about how fabulous you look.

Living well is the best revenge

[BarrySue 602]

I was very, very selective in who knew about my surgery, because I don't need that type of toxic environment. I'm very sorry you're dealing with that bunch of jackwagons.

[Nickkibear24 33]

@nickibear24 sorry you have no support. I am to shamed to tell anyone other than my mom, husband and sister. This is your life and your health. Keep pushing forward and after its all said and done they happy for you. When is ur surgery?

Its Aug 6th. Dont be ashamed its very obviously not the easy way out. Nothin about this process is easy. plus alot of us on here are emotional eaters so dont let those feeling drive you back into eating.

[ShrinkingPeach 1,291]

Sadly I haven't even told my family. All my co-workers know and they Celebrate every pound with me. My family is out of state so they will see me at Christmas, their jaws will drop and I will only say that I am on a high Protein and low carb lifestyle. That is all they need to know.

I am sorry that you don't have great support. Find a support group in your area and share. I go to one every month even though I have the support of my co-workers and my husband. It is nice to talk to people who are having the same issues. Maybe you can also be support for someone who has none.

[The Candidate 3,215]

I made an upfront decision to only tell those I knew would be supportive, and I've not had one regret. People can't disapprove of something they've no knowledge of.

Luckily in my case all my family and close friends were included in the supportive circle. I'm surrounded by positive and encouraging people and I thank my lucky stars!

[Norma Galitzen 26]

So today my "family" tells me that they have been talking about me and discussing my surgery. My "mother" (who is a f****** stick figure) says "Monique i really don't think this surgery is a good idea for you. this surgery is for bigger people." Exactly how much bigger would you like me to get? My dad who like me is prior military says why don't you just go for a 4-5 mile run every morning. Um maybe because the feeling of my knee popping out of place is freaking painful. I told him I walk every day 2-4 miles and that doesn't include the stairs im constantly doing. Everyone in my "family is telling me im taking the easy way out. I've told them already that this is happening whether they like it or not so they can hop on board or get the heck out of my way. But my whole family is skinny so they dont understand what its like being this big and uncomfortable in your own skin. My sister says she does because she's had 2 kids but I simply called her an idiot and walked away. Right after each pregnancy she went right back down to a size 0 and she eats significantly more than I do. Ugh how do you keep relationships and get healthy any advice.

Hi Nickkibear, the surgery is for you! Many of us got to out of control weights because we were not putting ourselves first. By the way, it looks like we have the same surgeon!! Dr. Mun rocked it out for me.

[26Amy 1]

What does everyone say at social events, dinners etc when you aren't eating? I have told my Mum & a couple of close friends only.

[jss1988 54]

I am sorry that your family is not supportive. I have had a co-worker tell me that I should not have the surgery because I am young and can lose the weight naturally. What people like that fail to understand is that I have already tried to lose weight naturally and end up gaining the weight back, plus more! If your whole family has been skinny all of their lives, then they do not know all that you have been through. I don't even listen to people who have always been skinny because they have never had to lose a significant amount of weight. Keep your head up an do what you feel is best.....

[Nickkibear24 33]

Was he really strict on the pre surgery weight loss because ive only lost 2 pounds in 2 weeks following the pre-op diet

Hi Nickkibear, the surgery is for you! Many of us got to out of control weights because we were not putting ourselves first. By the way, it looks like we have the same surgeon!! Dr. Mun rocked it out for me.

So today my "family" tells me that they have been talking about me and discussing my surgery. My "mother" (who is a f****** stick figure) says "Monique i really don't think this surgery is a good idea for you. this surgery is for bigger people." Exactly how much bigger would you like me to get? My dad who like me is prior military says why don't you just go for a 4-5 mile run every morning. Um maybe because the feeling of my knee popping out of place is freaking painful. I told him I walk every day 2-4 miles and that doesn't include the stairs im constantly doing. Everyone in my "family is telling me im taking the easy way out. I've told them already that this is happening whether they like it or not so they can hop on board or get the heck out of my way. But my whole family is skinny so they dont understand what its like being this big and uncomfortable in your own skin. My sister says she does because she's had 2 kids but I simply called her an idiot and walked away. Right after each pregnancy she went right back down to a size 0 and she eats significantly more than I do. Ugh how do you keep relationships and get healthy any advice.

Edited July 26, 2015 by Nickkibear24

[ASUgrad 61]

I've only told my mom, dad, and brother. Those are the only three that are ever going to know (for now). My mom and dad are totally supportive and behind me 100%. My brother, however, is a different story. He himself has always lost and gained the same 100 lbs over the years. Right now he is at his biggest and says that I am "lazy and just taking the easy way out." Because he was able to do it and "if you exercised regularly and ate well, you could lose the weight."

He just doesn't get it. His opinion doesn't sway me either way. It goes in one ear and out the other. I was shocked that he wasn't supportive of it. And a little hurt. But oh well. It's happening either way!!!

[LipstickLady 25,682]

What does everyone say at social events, dinners etc when you aren't eating? I have told my Mum & a couple of close friends only.

I don't say anything. People rarely notice and really don't care.

[provenzee 262]

Half of my family have weight issues like I do, and the other half are thin with perfect figures. Whenever I mention the surgery to the family members who have weight issues, they always tell me how excited they are for me to be taking this step in my life. Whenever I mention it to the thin half they always say things like, oh you don't need the surgery, do it on your own, and that its the easy way out. People who have never been overweight do not understand the struggle we go through everyday and how hard it is to lose weight. If I could do this on my own, dont you think I would have by now? Its frustrating but I am doing this because it is what I want, and what I need. Focus on the ones who support you, because anyone in our shoes would take this opportunity if they had it.

[Norma Galitzen 26]

He gave me the pre op diet 3 weeks before surgery. I lost 12 pounds total and I cheated a few times. I did get weighed in right before surgery and he was happy that I had lost. I don't know if he would have stopped the surgery if I did not lose any weight. Just don't gain!!! Get on track and stick with it from now until surgery.