What if I don't want to tell?

[Bournetodo 8]

Im going through the insurance hoops right now, but anticipating surgery in October. I am a teacher and will have to take off a few weeks of school to have the procedure. I don't know if I want to tell EVERYONE at work about having the surgery but want to know what to tell them as to why I was out for several weeks and then explaining the sudden weight loss. I don't want to open myself up to opinions and comments. How have y'all handled this? Is it best just to tell everyone?

[BrownEyedTxGirl 139]

The only person that knows I am having the gastric sleeve is my boyfriend. Only told him as I needed transportation to and from the hospital. Don't plan on telling anyone else. If someone inquires about my weight loss I will just tell them I am eating less and exercising more, which will be the truth!

[PinkieD 27]

I am an open book. I have told everyone. My hubby, my family, my friends and my coworkers and boss. I have asked each one individually if I can count on their support, because, boy am I gonna need it. ???????????? I think everyone feels differently and you absolutely need to do what feels right for you.

[Bournetodo 8]

My husband, children, mother, sisters, and best friend all know about it. I know I can count on their support! I just don't want to open up a discussion with the nay sayers!

[TeeNahh 40]

Everyone at my work knows, i was debating if I should have shared too...but they'll find out sooner or later, might as well be through your mouth instead of another's. That being said, as long as your confident in your choice and are happy you're doing this , forget theirs. Everyone is always going to have an opinion. You don't even know if they will be negative... Worst case scenario, they'll envy your weight loss from a far

Edited July 11, 2015 by TeeNahh

[ohjul 51]

I didn't tell but a handful at work- if they have the guts to ask afterwards then I'll tell them. I mean it will be obvious. My family and friends outside of work know.

[Djmohr 6,965]

I would suggest telling a little white lie. Tell them you are going in for a hernia repair. They do not need to know anything else.

It will then help while you are recuperating and still a bit sore in the tummy.

If folks ask how you are losing weight, tell them the truth. You have changed to a high Protein low carb diet. You have become more physically active.

It is none of anyone's business and completely up to you to decide what you do or do not tell people. Use tactics like changing the subject when asked about the details of your weight loss.

I chose to tell anyone who asks but it is a personal decision.

Good luck!

[SkinnyDown 409]

I told my immediate family, and even that was sketchy. A few of my family members were not happy with my decision, for various reasons.

I told my closest friends. People I trusted not to judge me, try to stop me, or tell others.

The rest of the people I know, extended family, and acquaintances, think I had more colon surgery. As I had a colon resection done a year and a half before my bypass surgery.

The only exception I make at this point, is I tell new men I meet, fairly soon, that I had surgery. None have cared yet. I just don't believe in starting anything new based on lies, or lies of omission.

In my opinion, you don't have to explain yourself to anyone. You owe no one any explanation, or reasoning of what you are doing. You are allowed to choose who you feel safest to tell, who you trust, and who you know won't discourage you.

If anyone questions the weight loss, you can attribute that to eating less, and exercising more. Simple as that. Change the subject, move on to something new.

Best of luck to you!

[terrydumont46 1,954]

Female problems is always a good one to go to. you don't have to tell anyone you don't want to. when my cousin first had hers done she told everyone that she does the treadmill an hour a day without fail. thhats how she lost her wt. it's nobody's business. good luck

[Bournetodo 8]

Thanks everyone for responding! I've told the people I want to tell and the rest can just "assume" what they want. Y'all are right, If i tell them Im eating less and exercising it won't really be a lie and truthfully no one that I haven't told the truth to probably don't care anyway! If they ask Ill just tell them I had a procedure! thats vague enough!

[TLW 163]

I am also a teacher and missed the last two weeks of school for surgery. I told them that I was having a small bowel resection due to some stomach and digestive issues, both are true. I just did not tell them details or that it was WLS.

[Babykakes78 4]

I choose to only tell my Husband, Parents, siblings and closest friends.

I figure it's **privileged** information so not everyone deserves to know.

I discussed it with my Boss because I HAD to, as far as the other people at work, I'll be on vacation for 2 weeks.

[KensingtonWalk 10]

I only told my boss so she knows that I will be needing some time off. You don't need to tell everyone.

[Lovelyorchid 16]

So I told my immediate family and 2ladies at work. People talk. And I know everyone will eventually figure it out taken I'm a nurse and work with smart nurses. But the more I think about it, maybe it's not such a bad thing. Of course they will have their opinions and remarks but ohh well! I'm getting healthy my way for my life and to live to see my son have a baby! Plus, it may not be a bad idea to have everyone know you may experience dumping symptoms or even pass out. Just so they don't freak out and have some idea I just had a major stomach surgery done. Plus if you need medical attention they can advocate for you regardless of their opinions.

I like to keep things private but this may end up saving my life if anything does happen. Which I pray doesn't to anyone of us!

[Dub 9,922]

It was an easy decision for me.

Everyone at work has seen me struggle these past few months with my back.

They've been expecting me to go for back surgery.

They've asked what I am doing about it and I've told them that extreme weight loss is the key to many of my ailments. They've already seen me make big eating changes and weren't surprised a bit about following 4 different doctor's suggestions to have WLS.

Most of them know folks or are even related to folks who have done the same. They have been very supportive.

It's going to help me be better at my job and in life. I've yet to encounter anyone who didn't support the decision.

My little sister did it 15 years ago and has maintained excellent weight results ever since. This brings the family support to the forefront.

I am very fortunate in that I don't have to worry about much in the way of negative feedback from others......thus far.