One month post surgery;mixed emotions

[scarletwitch19 302]

It's exactly one month since my surgery! I can't believe how fast the time went. I'm down 25lbs and honestly can't believe that I already am feeling different. My pants fit a little loose, I can work out a little longer, my face looks a little thinner, I never knew 25lbs could show all that.

I'm able to eat most soft foods without a problem, usually around a 1/2 cup at a time, sometimes maybe a couple bites more. I haven't gotten really sick or anything, which is a relief because I was really nervous about that!

It's tough sometimes, it gets overwhelming still. And it's hard talking to people who don't get it, I try to be patient but it's frustrating when people think this is easy or try to give nutrition advice when they know nothing about my procedure.

Just this week I had someone (who was considering surgery herself) tell me that they are afraid of surgery because of all the excess skin and how 'gross' people look. Then I was warned to not trust people because I'll be treated different and all of the sudden when I'm not fat I'll be good enough to hangout with. This went on for like 15 minutes.

I was SO hurt by what they said. I have enough insecurities through this process on my own, and yes excess skin and relationships with people are on my list of concerns. Who says this to people? Why are you trying to hurt my feelings, mind your own business! It really sucks, today's 1 month and I should be pretty excited, but it's been 2 days since those comments and I can't get it outta my head.

[maggie409 765]

Who says things like that you ask? Someone who is not as good a friend as you had thought. Those that love us and are true friends support us in whatever we do. Your progress sounds exactly like mine. I will be one month out soon. Excess skin??? Yes we will have it! And I'm soooo glad we will have it! That means we are successful. Every time I hear that I go into my bedroom and I take off my close and stand in front of a mirror naked and I look. What I have now can't be any prettier than loose skin. Will my friends abandon me? Absolutely not! And if they do, then I love them and let them go. I refuse to let anyone intimidate me or guilt me into regretting my decision. I don't know you. But I am super proud of you for doing this. This is probably the hardest thing we will face and it isn't just weight loss, it is a transformation of lifestyle. Will I be a skinny bitch? No because I'm not a fat bitch. We are who we are and the only changes that will occur in us are positive healthy life changes.

[The Candidate 3,215]

It always amazes me how people have so many opinions about other people's lives, and how desperate they are to share them.

Here's the thing, life does not come with a user's manual. It's all about on the job training. Tell them you're thrilled that they've got your life all figured out, and you'll get back to them next week with suggestions on how they can improve theirs.

You started this post full of wonder and joy, feeling better, looking better. That's a bonafide life rush. Don't let them spoil your buzz.

You're perfect! And I bet there will be a lot less nit picking from the peanut gallery as they continue to watch you shrink right in front of their eyes. ????

Edited July 9, 2015 by The Candidate

[Djmohr 6,965]

I say ditto to all! Nicely said.

[choosehope 233]

That excess skin is a battle scar. It means you've fought the fight and are on the LOSING side which makes you the winner!! Sorry you ran across someone so judgmental! But hold close to your heart what a monumental thing you are doing!!!

[Donald Garvey 31]

Hey...im 11 months out and down about 150lbs....I have allot of loose skin that im self conscious about, but id rather that skin be loose rather than filled out with fat

[Sarsa333 14]

I agree with everyone's supportive responses. This interaction was practice for you to have a sassy comeback if it comes up in the future.

Like, "thank you for your advice. It makes me feel like $h!t. I pray you never say anything like that to anyone. Ever."

I'm a huge fan of the TV show Scrubs and love dry sarcastic humor.

[ready2B 263]

Wow! Sounds like you need to find some better folks to hang out with!

What nasty things to say. I don't get why people say stuff like that. It's so incredibly rude to 1) make any comments about someone else's medical/nutritional needs unless you are their doctor! 2) say about anything on someone else's body as being "gross", and 3) making middle school girl statements about what other people will think about you! All of those are terribly immature and say a lot about the person who said them. Please don't give any credence to one word of it - as they say "consider the source!"

Congratulations on your first month and wonderful success! Hold you head high & find some people who will support you and cheer you on.

[TXMissy 211]

First off I want to say congrats!! I think the first month was the hardest. You are battling enough to figure out your new journey, you really just need that time to start building up your new eating habits. You have come such a long way!! Great job!!

I have heard nasty comments, but I just walk away. I'm sure a lot of it was said out of envy. I know that before I ever considered surgery, (Years ago) I looked down on it. My sister had the sleeve done. I felt it was the easy way out. Seeing the results though I have changed my opinion and have gone as far to do it myself. You said she has considered it, but there is a reason she hasn't. It's all vanity for her. You can't listen to her or anyone else. Do it for yourself. There are to many people willing to support you. I know because I'm one! Don't let other people get in your head!!

[scarletwitch19 302]

Thank you all! No matter how many times I tell myself in my head that I should let it go and move forward, it's easier to listen to someone else than myself