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28, mom of 2, scared!



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I just started the process of going for the gastric sleeve. I have 2 biological children- 7 1/2 year old daughter and 1 1/2 year old son, and a 13 1/2 year old step daughter. I am honestly terrified of complications and dying. I know there's always a risk of death for any surgery. I've already had the following surgeries: ENT, c-section, wisdom teeth removed, other teeth removed, gall bladder removal, parathyroid removed, 3 knee surgeries, kidney stone surgery 3 times and I think that's it lol. I'm just scared of long term. I do have anxiety bad and I'm working on being better with it but surgeries always scare me but I also know that if I don't get this weight off that that can kill me as well. I'm just wondering if the fear of complications and/or death scared or scares anyone else?

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I was not one bit scared. I had done my research, and I made sure to be a super compliant patient throughout the pre-op process. I had faith in the doctor and hospital I had chosen. I went into surgery calm, cool and collected. Thankfully my surgical process was super easy. I had minimal pain, no gas, nausea or vomiting. I did not use pain meds once I woke up or when I was discharged. My abs felt like I had done 100 sit ups the day before. I merely had some soreness but I could get in and out of bed on my own and walking was never an issue. This was by far the easiest surgery I ever had. Much easier than my knee surgery or radical hysterectomy.

If you have anxiety issues make sure your medical team know. They can give you something to help you relax prior to surgery.

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I was not one bit scared. I had done my research, and I made sure to be a super compliant patient throughout the pre-op process. I had faith in the doctor and hospital I had chosen. I went into surgery calm, cool and collected. Thankfully my surgical process was super easy. I had minimal pain, no gas, nausea or vomiting. I did not use pain meds once I woke up or when I was discharged. My abs felt like I had done 100 sit ups the day before. I merely had some soreness but I could get in and out of bed on my own and walking was never an issue. This was by far the easiest surgery I ever had. Much easier than my knee surgery or radical hysterectomy.

If you have anxiety issues make sure your medical team know. They can give you something to help you relax prior to surgery.

I'm definitely going to let them know about my anxiety. I thinks it's the whole "unknown" that scares me. I plan on being compliant and going by the book with everything they say. I've already changed a lot of how I eat and what I drink. The hospital I'm going to is EXCELLENT and the surgeons are great too. I know I shouldn't let my anxiety control my decisions which is why I'm not backing out. I honestly just can't wait for this process to be over. I'm hoping to have my surgery done in December if not then early spring at the latest ????

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Your thoughts are absolutely normal! I actually had the same fear, dying. It scared me so much that I cancelled my WLS last October. But, after many long months of being in pain, and talking with my surgeon I am happy to say I am being sleeved July 14th and can't wait! I think I'm more nervous about after surgery, how will I feel, will I be sick, how will I know I'm full. But as everything else in life it all works out. Good luck!!!

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To be scared of the unknown is to be human. Nothing you are feeling is out of the realm of understanding.

I think it might help if you spent a lot of time researching. Go into over research mode if you have to. I certainly did! You can continue with the approval process while you're doing it, as it'll help pass the time too.

Be sure that you seek out not only the good outcomes, but the not so good outcomes as well. Gotta get both sides of the equation. There's here, Obesity Help, Thinner Times, and YouTube has some really good videos of others who have been open enough to share their experiences with the world. Also seek out support groups in your area, find buddies who are going through the same thing.

At the end of the day you have to make sure that all your questions and concerns are addressed to your satisfaction, before going through with the surgery. I honestly believe that the more confident you are with your decision pre op, the better off you will be post op.

Good luck!

Edited by The Candidate

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Your thoughts are absolutely normal! I actually had the same fear, dying. It scared me so much that I cancelled my WLS last October. But, after many long months of being in pain, and talking with my surgeon I am happy to say I am being sleeved July 14th and can't wait! I think I'm more nervous about after surgery, how will I feel, will I be sick, how will I know I'm full. But as everything else in life it all works out. Good luck!!!

This is why I canceled my surgery back in August 2012. I honestly don't regret it because I was supposed to have the bypass down and honestly that wasn't for me PLUS I then wouldn't have my son because I found out I was pregnant with him (and his twin who I miscarried at 7 weeks) on January 12, 2012. I'm glad I'm not the only one that is scared. Good luck in your surgery!!!

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To be scared of the unknown is to be human. Nothing you are feeling is out of the realm of understanding.

I think it might help if you spent a lot of time researching. Go into over research mode if you have to. I certainly did! You can continue with the approval process while you're doing it, as it'll help pass the time too.

Be sure that you seek out not only the good outcomes, but the not so good outcomes as well. Gotta get both sides of the equation. There's here, Obesity Help, Thinner Times, and YouTube has some really good videos of others who have been open enough to share their experiences with the world. Also seek out support groups in your area, find buddies who are going through the same thing.

At the end of the day you have to make sure that all your questions and concerns are addressed to your satisfaction, before going through with the surgery. I honestly believe that the more confident you are with your decision pre op, the better off you will be post op.

Good luck!

Thanks for your honesty ???? I actually have 3 very good friends going for the gastric sleeve. One is more like a sister to me and we started the process together. I have been in research overload lol I watch videos on YouTube and I google stuff and look up stuff during the day when I'm able to. I already have a list of questions started for my surgeon. I'm fine with the surgery THEN my anxiety kicks in when I see something bad like someone dying after having it down and BAM that's when my anxiety kicks in and all these questions pop into my head. I've always had anxiety and always will have it. The bariatric program I'm going through knows I have anxiety and they told me it's normal.

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It sounds like you've really got everything in hand already. You know exactly what to do and are doing it. Good for you!

Don't beat yourself up for the periodic ups and downs. The occasional flutterings of doubts and fears. It's normal. And it's good that you are cognizant of the possible complications. You need to be. That's a healthy fear and its part of the process.

Just keep plugging along as you have been, and you'll be fine!

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I was terrified. I too worried about something going wrong and dying. I even cried as they wheeled me into the operating room and then they quickly administered the anesthesia! I felt much better after that :) I came out of surgery just fine and with a super easy recovery and now I am 4 weeks out and totally happy with the decision I made. I think it's normal to be fearful of going into surgery.

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It sounds like you've really got everything in hand already. You know exactly what to do and are doing it. Good for you!

Don't beat yourself up for the periodic ups and downs. The occasional flutterings of doubts and fears. It's normal. And it's good that you are cognizant of the possible complications. You need to be. That's a healthy fear and its part of the process.

Just keep plugging along as you have been, and you'll be fine!

Thank you so much ???? I'm going to embrace every feeling and emotion I have. I'm going to ask lots of questions and keep doing research. Death is possible with any surgery and I've already had my gall bladder removed and I didn't know that with each gall bladder there's a 50/50 chance of them cutting the correct cord. If they cut the wrong one you die immediately is what my surgeon told me. I'm glad I didn't know that until afterwards!!!

Edited by Krystyneh

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I was terrified. I too worried about something going wrong and dying. I even cried as they wheeled me into the operating room and then they quickly administered the anesthesia! I felt much better after that :) I came out of surgery just fine and with a super easy recovery and now I am 4 weeks out and totally happy with the decision I made. I think it's normal to be fearful of going into surgery.

Thank you so much for letting me know you feared the same thing. It's nice knowing I'm not alone. How are you doing? Any complications?

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I had the band surgery, which is really safe, but I was also very scared. The thing is that the surgeons do so many of these, that there is a very small risk at all. The best you can do is follow all the pre op instructions to the letter of the law with no cheating! My surgeon told me that my surgery was so easy for him because I followed the diet, and I'm very heavy. Pray to whatever higher power you believe in (if you do) and try to remain strong for your children. By going ahead with the surgery, you'll be a much healthier parent for your children moving forward.

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I had the band surgery, which is really safe, but I was also very scared. The thing is that the surgeons do so many of these, that there is a very small risk at all. The best you can do is follow all the pre op instructions to the letter of the law with no cheating! My surgeon told me that my surgery was so easy for him because I followed the diet, and I'm very heavy. Pray to whatever higher power you believe in (if you do) and try to remain strong for your children. By going ahead with the surgery, you'll be a much healthier parent for your children moving forward.

Thank you ???? I'm leaving it all in God's hands. I have to get healthier for them plus my husband and I want 1-2 more kids BUT with having PCOS and already having 12 miscarriages, losing weight will make it easier and safer for me to carry babies PLUS I need to be healthy for them. It sucks when I can't run around after them and play with them the way I want to

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