I Was Told I Look Like I Have AIDS Today..... :-/

[AlanaRN 419]

I think you look great! People need to stop making comments. I'm not even to goal yet but my co workers are already starting to make comments about how I'm obsessive and need to eat more. You know what I think? I think people like to have fat people around them to make themselves feel better. Now that I'm not that person anymore, they don't know how to act!

In addition, I'm an ER nurse and its a myth that all people with AIDS look a certain way. You can't pick them out the waiting room! People are just crazy!

[livvsmum 2,369]

I think you look great! People need to stop making comments. I'm not even to goal yet but my co workers are already starting to make comments about how I'm obsessive and need to eat more. You know what I think? I think people like to have fat people around them to make themselves feel better. Now that I'm not that person anymore, they don't know how to act!

In addition, I'm an ER nurse and its a myth that all people with AIDS look a certain way. You can't pick them out the waiting room! People are just crazy!

Exactly.....offensive on that level too.

[ShrinkingPeach 1,291]

I agree with your points also. What an inappropriate comment to make. The fact she felt it was okay to say makes a statement in itself. What if she says that to someone who DOES have AIDS? Omg, I can't imagine.

You look beautiful and normal. I know that you know that, but that's my two cents.

I agree that we have a distorted view of normal weight, maybe she is just jealous of your success. I have seen some folks who have lost a lot of weight when I had not seen them in a long time and it CAN be a bit startling when they don't look like they did when you saw them last, but the same would be true if my red hair were suddenly blonde when you saw me next. It's still me.

People these days are so desensitized by things they can say on the internet while hidden in the safety of their homes or offices, I swear it is filtering into real live conversations.

And then some people just have no manners or filters.

Just know you are healthy, look amazing and that pic is an inspiration to us all fighting to get there.

[_Kate_ 2,224]

@@livvsmum As long as you feel good and healthy sod everyone else!!

By the way, you look lovely - they are probably envious

Kate

[Daveo 485]

I have no idea how it came up....let me think. I think I was talking about Spanx with a co-worker (which I am currently wearing because of recovering from a tummy tuck) and another co-worker overheard and said "why do you have to wear spanx??? you're already too skinny". I said something like, "oh it holds everything in place..haha" trying to be light-hearted. Then she told me that I looked like I had AIDS and that I needed to stop losing weight and I needed to gain some back. This is also something (not that specifically, but the same idea) that my mom says every time she visits. She'll say something like, "you look sick. you looked better before."

Let's focus on the work conversation though. There is so much wrong with it. So much. I will attach my most recent picture so you can see that I don't really look awful.....and/or sickly.....

1. First of all, I don't like the derogatory nature of the comment towards anyone who is an AIDS patient. Not cool.

2. I get that when you knew someone when they were obese, and now you see them skinny, it takes some adjusting and sometimes it takes a while for you to think they look "normal" in their new body....but.... WHY do people think it's ok to comment on my weight?????

3. I am within a healthy weight range. My doctor is not concerned. My surgeon is not concerned. My therapist is not concerned.

4. Can we revisit #2?

5. You can fill in the blank....there's gotta be something else wrong with this.

It doesn't bother me really. I don't let people's comments effect my emotional well-being anymore. I just thought it was the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. And I am STUNNED at the forwardness of some people. And I am stunned at the fact that other people who are just work colleagues, not even close friends, feel the freedom to comment on my weight at will.

PSA........don't share your comments on people's weight or appearance unless they start it.

I agree that you look normal!

[KristenVSG2014 1,872]

You look fantastic! Haters gonna hate. People will say stupid, insensitive comments. Just ignore them and move on.

[PokeyJo 47]

Some people should keep their opinions to themselves. You look wonderful!

[Tricebhasstyle 51]

What a more than terrible thing to say to someone. Report her to someone, anyone. How freaking rude and uncalled for.

[WL WARRIOR 692]

I've been starting to get similar comments. The most annoying comments I've overheard have been those questioning if I'm abusing drugs. Maybe I should have been more open about this surgery so others wouldn't speculate so much. I'm beginning to have the same issue with my mother. She thinks I've taken it too far. There was a brief period during my teens when I was anorexic, but that was over 22 years ago. She complained about me being too big and now she complains that I'm too thin. She will never be content and I'm not going to live my life to make her satisfied, whatever that may be.

I think you look healthy. However, I believe everyone carries their weight differently. I probably would look anorexic at 125 pounds and my doctor is already concerned with how I look at 140. Hopefully, it is like someone else mentioned. That my body will readjust over time. I did lose my weight quite quickly and my period even stopped four months ago. According to my doctor, it should come back once my body gets use to this new weight. As for now, my spine and ribs are starting to stick out. My spine even hurts today because I had to sit in a steel chair for a couple of hours yesterday.

[Luv`n_all-of_Me 8]

I think you look great and healthy. I know it is hard, but please try to ignore ignorance.

[Gaelsmom 100]

First and foremost the comment was offensive.

However, I must say that people in general have a difficult time estimating other people's weight including my own mothet. They do have a point of comparison which is your former self. So they easily note the weight loss or in my situation pre-surgery, the gains. It's hard to abandon their points of reference of your former self or when they believed you were healthy.

For those who don't know about the weight loss, they will see you as a fit slender woman. You look incredible.

[joymomof7 7]

You look amazing!!!!

[Thenewnic 139]

First off...hugs...the audacity of some people shouldn't surprise me at this point. You look great!!! AND continually inspire me in my VSG journey. I've been running now for about a month all because you did. Reading your blog gave me hope those first couple of months, along with my own therapist, on knowing that losing the weight with the right choices is attainable. When I was 100lbs heavier I was once compared to fat Amy by a stranger... it's horrifying to realizing that after possibly reaching my goal, I still could be continually judged. It's the society we live in. ????

[2Big2Skate 328]

Ignorance is the only natural resource we'll never run out of.

"Would you tell a recovering addict, 'i liked you better on crack'?"

[chrisredjeep 357]

You look perfectly normal ! Just folks being jealous of your great weight loss. How rude of that person to make that comment. Big hugs from UK to you