excitement fading - please help

[luvmyiggy 0]

When I first got my surgery date about two weeks ago you could not peel me off the ceiling I was so excited. But now my excitement is fading fast and being replaced with nerves and discoragement.

There is no doubt in my mind that I need to do this, I am just starting to get worried about the results. I weigh 465 and I am scared that I am not going to be able to lose enough to make a real difference. For someone who weighs as much as I do 100 pounds doesn't make that much of a difference. I noticed that with a friend of mine who had it done. He weighed a bit more than I do, but he lost 120 and people were just starting to notice. They thought he had lost about 40 pounds. What a slap in the face. I am just scared of getting discoraged and getting depressed. Is it realistic to lose 250 pounds? I haven't met or seen anyone yet who was able to get even close to a "normal" weight when they started out weighing what I weigh.

I am I being unrealistic?

[marjon9 6]

250 pounds is a long way to go, no doubt, but I've seen some people talk about losing more then 200. It can be done. You should probably look for the thread for high BMI bandsters. I know this has been discussed before.

I also do not agree with you that at your weight 100 pounds does not make a difference. It will make a tremendous difference to your health and how you feel about life and your level of activity. And who cares of people only think you lost 40 pounds, or whatever. This is not a "slap in the face." Weight loss is a little less obvious on a big person. So what? Why is any of that important right now? You health and maybe even your life is at stake here. You have much bigger things to worry about than whether people will properly notice your weight loss.

To me the question is this: Will it be easier to lose the weight with the band? If it will, then it seems like a good idea to add it to your weight loss tool chest. With 250 pounds to lose you are going to need to do many things on the road to recovery. You'll need to have a sensible diet, not involving starvation by any means, but sensible. You'll have to exercise. We are not talking about becoming a triathlete, but some amount of exercise is going to be necessary. At least a lot of walking. You will probably also want to look into how and why you got that large. It would not hurt to consider some of those psychological and emotional issues in this process. So it will probably take a combination approach. And it will definitely take time.

But, will it be easier with the band? I think the answer is yes. And, frankly, it may be close to impossible without the band.

So, if you go into this whole thing with a realistic view, I think you will be in a position to succeed. Don't go into it thinking that the band is a magic wand that is going to do it all for you. That will not happen and if you think it will, you are setting yourself up for a big disappointment. But even though the band is not magic, it is an extremely useful tool that will very likely make your journey much easier. It will be a big part of your weight loss package, and it may very well be the thing that puts you over the top in this battle and lets you succeed.

luvmyiggy, your life is at stake here. 465 if life threatening. Stop putting your attention on the things that don't matter. Get out there and fight.

Good luck to you.

[kadrianmatthews 0]

I started out with a high BMI still do have one. But I also have to loose over 200lbs. Hell if I can do anyone can. Put your mind to it and can happen. Look at my wieght lost ticker I'm down over 40lbs in less than 2months. Just know that you have to work hard and that it's no quick fix. It's a problem you need to fix and you are taking the first step.

Good Luck

[faithmd 14]

luvmyiggy,

Mark is dead on in his comments to you. I would also add a little something from my journey that may put things in perspective. I started my weightloss journey at 371# (I'm 5'7" tall), from late January/early February until now I have lost about 47-49lbs (depends on the day) and folks only just started asking me if I've been losing weight. They guessed about 15 or 20lbs. I think it is because no one would EVER have guessed that I weighed 371 at one point, just as no one would ever believe you are 465. I haven't changed a jeans size yet, either. They are getting baggier, but they are not falling off. It's all based on their perspective. The bigger you are, the more you lose before it becomes noticeable.

Who cares if you make a "normal" weight? Isn't the point to lose weight and get healthier? Even if you only end up losing 100lbs, that means you didn't stay 465, you didn't gain to above 500, you would have LOST 100lbs! I think it's worth it! If after really honestly trying with the band and working with it as it's intended (trying not to cheat, giving it time, moving around and burning off calories, making better food choices) and after a year or so it hasn't helped at all, then you can always have it removed and then get bypass or another procedure. That's part of the beauty of the band, it's totally reversible.

Good luck!

[cyndilou29 0]

It's very normal to have these concerns pre-op. I couldn't agree more with what everyone else posted. If you lose 100 lbs that's a major accomplishment. Think about carrying around a kid that weighs 100lbs every day. Then think about putting him down! How much easier will it be to walk?

You can do this. It's a good thing and whether you lose 100lbs or 250lbs you are going to be healthier. Focus on that if you can.

Good luck. I know once you do this you'll be happy you did.

[GR8 1]

Amen!

Also Remember -- people notice but don't say anything not sure how to approach the subject -or uncomfortable to discuss. Think how many times you have done this - with someone else that you thought was losing weight.

Gina

[WASaBubbleButt 41]

<p>I have a friend that had more to lose than you do and he's doing it. He's lost a LOT of weight. He's my inspiration to be quite honest.</p> <p> </p> <p>I emailed him but I happen to know he is ill right now so I'm not sure he's spending much time on line. BTW, his illness is not band/weight related.</p> <p> </p> <p>If he feels up to it I'm quite sure he'll respond.</p>

Edit to clarify: I emailed him a link to this thread.

[Sula 0]

I wonder if you're having some normal pre-surgery jitters? I saw a posting here about a month ago of a guy who lost 80 pounds in two months....I'm getting close to my 6 month date and have lost 40-41 to date. I couldn't do this any other way and I've tried most all the other ways.

It shouldn't matter if people don't notice our weight loss...but I have to admit...very few people have commented. I wonder if they are trying be polite and not offend. I keep thinking someone will notice, but I regroup when adulations are not coming my way. I'm losing it for me. I"m more active, I feel better, my close fit better...my horse doesn't groan as much when I ride. My goal is to be able to step up on her without mounting block (hub of the horsetrailer or a hill..whatever).

Do it for yourself, set your own goals, regroup when you need to and don't worry so much about others. Come here for support...it REALLY helps.

Shawn

[Johnsonlin 1]

<p>Sula - I agree! I wonder if the reason people don't comment more is that, in my case, I have lost lots of pounds more than once.... about the time they comment I was already on the road to those pounds finding me again. Many of the people I work with have seen the cycle more than once so I think they'll wait, and watch... just to make sure they should comment.</p> <p>???</p> <p>Our health is the priority. 'luvmyiggy' good luck with your jitters! I know all will be well and you will feel much better as you sucessfully clear each little obstacle along the way.</p> <p> </p> <p>Have a great day, all.</p>

[meatmad 0]

hi, i too have got a lot of weight to lose ive lost 12stone now and still ave at least 9 stone to go ...i had your worrys to , ieven got morbid for a while but her i am 9 months on , 2 fills, on second fill at mo and it feels tight.. u will ave doubts but for me it is the best thing i ave ever done good luck love kym

[juliegeraci 7]

I don't think you are unrealistic. Just know that it will take you time to get there. Make sure you work with your surgeon to get optimal restriction as soon as you can. You will be fine. It will just take you more time.

[musicalmomma 1]

hi, i too have got a lot of weight to lose ive lost 12stone now and still ave at least 9 stone to go ...i had your worrys to , ieven got morbid for a while but her i am 9 months on , 2 fills, on second fill at mo and it feels tight.. u will ave doubts but for me it is the best thing i ave ever done good luck love kym

Stone translation for us USA'ers: 1 stone = roughly 11 pounds. My DH is from the UK and I believe that's what he told me. I only know this because his mum keeps losing and gaining and only speaks on "stone" so he had to translate for me.

luvmyiggy: Like the others have said, your concern is ligitimate. My DH is 437 and should be banded in August (hopefully we'll get the date today!) He has the same concerns you do. Then he thought to himself, "if I don't do this, I will just GAIN more weight and end up bed ridden!" He resolved, like many others have, that if he only loses 100 pounds, he'd still be worlds healthier than he is now. However, he has hope and faith that he will get to his goal of 225 because he will finally have a tool that will help him recognize feeling full.

I was banded June 1st and have only lost 6 pounds since surgery...I was VERY discouraged until reading some posts on here that reminded me that if I hadn't had the band...I would have probably gained weight in the last 3.5 weeks. When I look at it that way, I just rejoice in my decision to take control and get healthy.

So, when IS your surgery date? Keep us posted :confused:

[leedorr 0]

Morbid obesity is real! You are worth everything you are doing! I agree with othr people who have posted. Do this for your own life! It is hard. I started at 378# dieted down to 325# and then was banded. It has been 11 months and I am down 100 ounds. It took about 125 before people really noticed. You life will change drastically as you loose the weight. Be good to yourself, follow your Dr's protocol, eat Protein first then veggies and then fruitnif you can. Drink lots of Water and sugar free beverages, try to stay away from carbonated drinks and get moving! You can do this and you deserve nothing but the best you can give yourself!

[WASaBubbleButt 41]

I was banded June 1st and have only lost 6 pounds since surgery...I was VERY discouraged until reading some posts on here that reminded me that if I hadn't had the band...I would have probably gained weight in the last 3.5 weeks. When I look at it that way, I just rejoice in my decision to take control and get healthy.

Ohhh, MM.. don't feel discouraged! You just had surgery recently. Some people have restriction with the band alone and some don't. For some working on an empty band is like driving a car with flat tires. It will work but not well and you won't get far. Losing any weight during bandster hell is a GOOD thing!