Anyone else aggravated?

[ShrinkingPeach 1,291]

Maybe it is just me but I know I am working very hard at following my plan to the letter. I have been overweight my whole life and this is my final attempt to become healthy. Skinny would be nice but healthy is my ultimate goal.

I love this forum as most people are very nice. They share their struggles and successes and it gives me hope. I see that I am going through things that those before me have. I see that if I do what I am supposed to do I will be successful.

It totally chaps me when I see the following:

"I am so hungry that I decided to eat what I want instead of staying on my Protein Shakes because I just can't do it one more day"

"I need to lose weight to qualify for surgery but I can only seem to lose a pound, I swear I am eating 600 calories and walking miles a day"

Some one asks what to do and someone else says "Sure go ahead and eat that or do that" knowing its complete sabotage.

Someone is here trying to justify eating burgers and cakes and ice cream

IDK why it bothers me so but it really does. I have to walk away some times and not look at it. I want to scream lol

Does anyone else feel this way?

[lexiemia 78]

I have had the same thoughts about people being 3 weeks post op and whining about when they can have wine again. I think these are people who were not really ready to commit to this surgery and this FOREVER change in eating habits. We all know wine is nothing but sugar so why would they think it would be allowed in this diet. Especially early on. I just grin and shake my head and think we won't be seeing any before and after pics of them any time soon. Some of us just appreciate this gift more than others. But you rock girl!! So keep

Up the good work.

[Miss Mac 6,262]

My rant on this topic is being called a "goody two shoes" (yes, that happened) for following my plan.

[JamieLogical 8,708]

I get frustrated by it sometimes too, but I try to be empathetic. Lord knows if I ate perfectly all the time and always did what I am "supposed" to do, I would never have needed WLS in the first place. People in glass houses and all that....

However, I do believe that when you are seriously committed to WLS you should do your absolute best (not be perfect, mind you, just put in the effort). There is a lot of money on the line for one thing. Whether you are self-pay or not, the cost of this surgery is not insignificant. People who have their insurance pay for the procedure shouldn't take it for granted. After all, you presumably pay for your insurance or your employer does, so it's indirectly costing you or your coworkers in the long run.

But, more importantly, we are talking about serious health risks associated with not sticking to the plan. Eating off-plan on your pre-op diet means your liver might be an issue for your surgeon when they are trying to perform your surgery. Eating off-plan post-op can lead to leaks or tears along your staple line, food getting stuck, or all sorts of potential LIFE THREATENING scenarios. And even if you just aren't working to get all your Protein and Water in, that can have serious health consequences for you.

SO if you commit to having this surgery, you should commit to doing your absolute best to make the most of it. No one is going to be perfect 100% of the time and I definitely don't encourage people to go off-plan, but I do think people need to have the capacity to forgive themselves and move on when they slip up. Beating yourself up isn't going to accomplish a whole lot either. You have to find a balance. You can't make excuses and let old habits creep back in, but you can't live a life of deprivation and misery and self-punishment either.

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

This is one reason most veterans don't stay around. And you get lambasted, called a bully and worse if you attempt to tell people the truth.

I went through a time when I could barely stand it, but I cope iwth it now by not reading most of those types of posts. It took me awhile to figure this out, but it is better to let those stil in the honeymoon period respond to all that. Their reality and truth is that they pretty much can do all that stuff and still lose weight. come year 2, 3 etc that is when they will start looking for solutions to a different set of problems (regain for example) and that is when my voice might actually make a difference.

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

Well I have been called a bully for suggesting that following the plan is part of what you signed up for/paid for when you picked a surgeon and surgery. oh well - everyone has to find their own path.

My rant on this topic is being called a "goody two shoes" (yes, that happened) for following my plan.

[ShrinkingPeach 1,291]

Perfect responses! I know we are all too human as am I. I know we will slip and fall on this journey and no one is perfect. The ones I am referring to are the people basically asking for someone to tell them its okay to cheat, etc.

I will be the first to say get back on the horse, you can do it! But I will also be honest.

Everyone is amazing here and so supportive. @@Miss Mac, I love that you keep it real! I love your posts!

@@CowgirlJane, bully on, at least we are honest while being supportive.

@@JamieLogical, I also see your posts all the time and you definitely have a handle on what to do and not do.

@@lexiemia, my friend, you are simply amazing and I can't wait to see how far you go with this!!

Thanks guys!!

[JamieLogical 8,708]

I will say that I am often shocked by the number of people who post to these forums who seem to just genuinely have NO clue what they should/shouldn't be eating post-op. Did they not receive any information from their surgeons and nutritionists? I find that incredibly hard to believe. And if they didn't receive adequate info from their surgeons, then why they heck did they go through with the surgery?!?!?! I would never, in a million years, undergo major surgery without learning every single thing I could about it before hand. If I couldn't get the info from my surgeon, then I would look for it elsewhere. I wouldn't make such a huge decision with no information!

[lauraellen80 855]

It totally chaps me when I see the following:

[...]

"I need to lose weight to qualify for surgery but I can only seem to lose a pound, I swear I am eating 600 calories and walking miles a day"

I'm worried that this is directed toward me and my post the other day about being concerned that I wasn't losing enough weight on my pre-op diet. I can assure you that I wasn't looking for permission to cheat on my plan, and I was not lying about not having cheated on my plan. I was just looking for honest advice on whether I was doing something wrong that was affecting my pre-op loss. And I did end up calling my surgeon's office and speaking to the PA about my concerns.

I'm sorry if I offended you. I'm still new to this, and it's overwhelming and scary, and I'm just grateful to have a place to see how other people deal with weight loss surgery.

Edited June 11, 2015 by lauraellen80

[MrsSugarbabe 727]

I agree with you all!!

This was a radical route to take to get my weight down to a much healthier level and to resolve multiple medical issues. I paid too much money, and suffered through hellacious post-op consequences to NOT follow my surgeon and NUT's recommendations.

[Babbs 14,681]

Girlfriend, you're preaching to the choir!

I've only been on this site a little over a year, and I get tired of it. But I try so hard to be supportive in a "tough love" kind of way. Needless to say, not everyone appreciates my approach

I have gotten to the point of not responding to those UNLESS they are fresh out of surgery and are doing something that can physically hurt them. Once they've healed up, it's not up to me to brow beat someone to make correct choices so they are successful. It's up to them and them alone. I can support, guide and empathize. In the mean time, I intend to get to my goal weight by choosing to do the right things. Just like they can choose to do the same

[navymom1 26]

I worked really hard to come up with the money to pay for surgery (All self pay). I am working really hard to make this work for me. I try to ignore those that want to cheat, sabatoge, etc. They are only cheating and sabatoging themselves. Just ignore it and move on to those who are making the lifetime changes they need to make.

[lclemur 161]

Sometimes it annoys me, but most of the time, I am very sorry for them. They have gone through major surgery without a clue on how this will affect them and their future. Perhaps they don't have a good nutritionist, perhaps they didn't understand that this wasn't an "instant fix." In any case, I try not pick on them. They are clearly confused, and slapping them up side the head will simply not help.

[Rogofulm 2,440]

I'm with those who can't understand how someone would choose to have weight loss surgery without doing TONS of research. If we're on this forum, we all have some level of internet access, right? There are thousands of sites out there with information about what you should and should not do after bariatric surgery. Most of them are put up by surgical centers, but that's okay. They're the experts in the field, right? But there are also lots of sites from the medical profession with info, statistics, results, etc about the subject. So when someone asks how soon they can have wine or bread, it makes my head explode too. Furthermore, I think their doctors should lose their licenses for performing surgery on uninformed patients.

And for anyone reading this topic who may not have received information from their doctor, here's a site I've found that has a great deal of helpful information. http://www.bariatric-surgery-source.com/ Hope that helps!

[JamieLogical 8,708]

Furthermore, I think their doctors should lose their licenses for performing surgery on uninformed patients.

I agree. It's pretty disgraceful that any surgeon would perform surgery on a patient without ensuring they are FULLY informed about all of the steps they will have to take post-op to ensure the best possibly recovery and outcome. It reflects badly on the surgeons if their patients fail, so you would think it would be in their best interests to do everything in their power to help them succeed!