Don't rush it

[gowalking 10,790]

After a loss of about 100 lbs. and bilateral hip replacements, I looked at myself in the mirror and was horrified at what I saw. My lower body was badly swollen from the surgery and my skin on my face and neck especially, hung and sagged. My hair was falling out from the weight loss and trauma of two surgeries in less than one year.

I went to see a therapist to help me with my issues and have been working with her for more than a year. Shortly after starting to meet with the therapist, I had to undergo yet another surgery for an unexpected health issue. I had now been through three major surgeries in a span of 12 months.

Now that I am really starting to feel healthy and well, I have decided that for now, not to explore plastic surgery. My skin is loose where we are all dealing with loose skin. My upper legs are badly wrinkled, My upper arms sag, my belly skin and breasts hang and I still have a turkey neck though it's gotten better over this past year in that some elasticity has returned.

Between my bonus and long term incentive payout, I have money to begin the plastic surgery process. And that is how I know I don't want to move forward with it. At least not at this time. I don't want to have more surgery right now. I don't want to recuperate, I don't want to deal with drains, compression garments, post op pain, etc. etc.

I just want a break from all things medical. I knew I felt this way but last night, I was convinced. It was a nice evening last night and I decided to walk towards home after seeing a show with my sister. I knew I could grab a bus or train at any point where I got too tired to walk and I wound up feeling good enough to walk all the way home from the theater district back downtown. It was over a mile that I strolled. I know that's not much for those who walk daily but for me, it's alot. Especially as I couldn't walk a block without stopping before I lost the weight and had the hip replacements.

I've learned to hide my 'flaws' well. I know now how to dress and how to use foundation garments. As far as being naked, I've also found out that men my age are not so interested in perfect bodies as they are in just sharing a bed and having someone to snuggle with. I've also realized that if someone has an issue with how my body looks, he's not the man for me anyway.

I titled this post 'don't rush it' for a reason. My decision took more than a year to make. I was gung-ho for plastics right after the big weight loss but giving myself the time to get used to the new me, meant a change of heart. If you want plastics, go for it. Not my place to say one way or the other. I'm just putting my thoughts and feelings out there for those who are leaning towards leaving things as they are...at least for now.

[AussieSam 234]

I agree with you 100 percent, let the body adjust to the new you and there is no rush as you got your whole life to do plastic surgery.

[parisshel 1,892]

As someone who has also spent too much time in hospitals, I understand this sentiment. I hope I never have to undergo another medical procedure that involves hospitalization...even plastic surgery. Not worth the pain and risk involved. This is probably an age-thing. I'm sure if I were 30, never been married and never had kids, I'd probably think differently.

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

I get you. I had a span of about a month when all I could think about was what plastic surgery could I get and how soon. I even asked a plastic surgeon at a support group meeting if I could get it before I reached goal. My insurance will change from excellent to crappy once my divorce is final.

Talk about putting the cart before the horse. You are so right. If my head isn't okay with my new body before I choose plastics, it's a recipe for disaster. And contemplating surgery with fifty pounds left to lose? What the heck am I thinking?

I will probably get a Tummy Tuck eventually. But not for at least a year. First I have the extra weight to lose. And then I need to work on my self image.

Take a well deserved break.