Am I the only one who regrets their Sleeve?

[michellemartin961 29]

@ rhw94123

I need to update my profile. I was sleeved on 4/27/15. I have been a member of this site since 2012 because I had been deciding back and forth with getting WLS since then. I actually had my initial procedure scheduled in May 2012, but canceled 24hr before my surgery because I was scared, plus I let my husband and father talk me out of it. I wish I would've gotten the lap band because it's reversible. I hardly seen any negative comments about WLS so I took a chance. Even people I know personally always talked about the good. If I would've read more comments like mine during my research, I would've thought harder about my decision. I'm only 28 and haven't had kids yet, but plan to. I just pray that this feeling will pass. I hate what I did to myself.

My daughter had her sleeve 2/25/14 and has helped me to understand that what you are going through is normal. It's much like the 5 stages of grief and should pass over time. She did so well with her surgery and postoperative I thought I would too but the truth is mine was different and is a bit of a challenge though my sleeve was 5/26/15.

I see food commercials and they gross me out! I'm on the full liquid stage and one day I can have something then throw it up the next. My daughter encourages me to not give in to depression and "this too shall pass." Eating a "normal size portion" is a misconception and part of brain hunger. Soon you will eat more than 3 bites but with that you will need to be careful to not overeat because of brain hunger which stretches your new little stomach out.

I won't take a moral high ground attitude but I will encourage you to keep a diary of your feelings and explore why food means so much to you. That might indicate areas of emotional eating and hunger rather than eating because you are truly hungry....rumbling stomach and all ????????.

Read up on gastric surgery, join a Facebook bariatric support group or one in your local area, purchase bariatric weight loss recipe books (Amazon has several including Kindle versions), and know you are not alone and this is a normal reaction which should get better with time.

Michelle

[CowgirlJane 14,261]

Ok. I have had the band and then later the sleeve...you made the right choice.

You have a brand new baby tummy! Like a Newborn it needs alot of TLC but it will mature and become much easier.

I am 3.5 years post band to sleeve revision. I can eat enough at a sitting I just look like a petite eater. I am healthy, I am normal size, like my looks and like single digit clothing sizes.

Give this time. What you experience now is temporary and take advantage of it to lose weight because a year from now you will regret not taking full advantage if you don't.

[Wendyfm 494]

By a year out you should be able to eat a cup of food for sure. I remember being only able to eat a few table spoons of food in the beginning as well. It gets better.

[jaw 4]

I am not quite a month out and having issues with nausea/vomiting. Only on pudding consistency foods that can stay down. Unable to take any Vitamins for about 2 weeks now. I know I am healing and this is a process.

But like any one there are emotions involved. Why did I have to have so many complications? Why can't I advance my diet/fluids/protein like I should be able to by now? Why did I spend almost 200 on Vitamins and foods I can't tolerate !!!

When I read these posts it makes me realize what I truly regret. That I needed this surgery to commit to true weight loss. My entire life of yo-yo dieting (lose 20 gain 35, lose 60 gain 80) has really affected me emotionally/physically. This surgery, my VSG, is the tool that I chose after decades of self abuse to get to a BMI of 40 pre-op.

Now, was I crying in the shower last night d/t frustration YES! Will I be frustrated and pissed off some days - YES!!!

As far as socialization, let them eat! I will join people out and watch them and think oh I wish! but in my mind I am thinking - I chose this, I needed this, and they support me! Looking back if I have to be honest, the food was an essential piece of the evening, something we all shared - even if I ate as much or more as the men present. I can eat a few bits of SF/FF chocolate pudding. that can be my desert.

I think talking to someone is very beneficial. Also I haven't read you talking about your social support. Is someone there for you daily who supports and loves you! My Rock my everything has gotten me through this, as is my will.

Easy for me to write think positive. At 5 am I was in tears after vomiting again - 3rd time in 24 hours. took a good sleep and now ate some cottage cheese and pudding! I am trying so hard to focus on the little things.

It isn't all roses , and I hope and wish for you that your support and therapy helps you find a place where you accept this surgery and your healing. Best wishes to you, and in case you need it = a big hug!

[Sharon1964 2,530]

Going to dinner functions is depressing, because I can't eat. 3 bites and I'm full. That's not healthy. It saddens me that I'm not and probably will never be able to enjoy a healthy portion sized meal. It's not about overeating, but just being able to enjoy a healthy meal with family and friends socially is normal.

I hate that I can't drink Water as plentifully as I used to. I love Water and would drink 2 liters daily before this surgery. Now I'm lucky if I get in 28 oz, which is not healthy. I get constipated often and my urine is darker. My menstrual cycle and hormones are off.

I feel full throughout the day no mater what I eat or drink. I plan to have children one day and I can't imagine having hunger pains while pregnant knowing I can only eat a couple bits of food. I know women become more fertile after losing weight, but there is still risk of the baby being malnourished, which scares me.

Praying for hope and emotional health and that I will one day soon adjust to my new way of life.

Look at the parts that I highlighted. I think you would do well to spend some time examining your ideas of "healthy". What is healthy for you and your existing ideas of what is healthy for you are not the same. A "healthy portion" for you is not a plate full of food.

As far as babies go, the baby gets nourished first. Your body will cause you to lose weight if it has to in order for the baby to get what it needs.

[banksdea 10]

@ Sharon1964

My surgeon office sent me home with a bariatric Portion Control plate, which healthy portions for your meats, veggies and starches. I wasn't able to finish a quarter of anything off that plate. I do notice that chicken goes down better for me than fish does.

I was in a better place emotionally on yesterday in the midst of being at a family BBQ surprisingly. I just drank Water, ate 3 very small wings, and a bite of Beans. I'm taking it a day at a time though. I really do appreciate all the support on this site.

[Tricebhasstyle 51]

To be honest I'm pre surgery but I hope and pray to God I don't have these feelings so strongly. After watching hundreds of YT vids some over and over of "the journey" it seems to get better and better for most people. Be glad you are complication free honey. That's the hope. It'll be better I believe. You have much success and happiness ahead of you. Get off the blogs n boards and go live a little. Do something new unrelated to food and see if that takes your mind off of it until the situation improves. Lifting you up n prayer. Latrice

[Maggietcu2 55]

I think jaw hit the nail on the head ... your upset you even needed to be in this position in the first place. Me, too! But you're here regardless. Time to pull up your big girl panties and make this work for you. You can do this!

[agalindo17 331]

it shows u are a lap-band surgery u can get that out right?? or do you have the sleeve? I'm a bit confused and i went thru this around that same time as you it part of the anestesias and the shock from the surgery my doctors say and some of the support group here too. it does get better and restriction get better too just give it time...

good luck!!

[Miss Mac 6,262]

I spent my whole adult life thinking I could do this on my own. I lost over 50 pounds several times and gained more back with each attempt. i even joined a gym twice and signed up for swimming lessons.I kept trying and trying until I had a stroke. I was becoming my mother who died too young of an abdominal aortic aneurysm. She was 5'2" and weighed over 320 pounds. I wish she could have had a sleeve, but nobody was doing them in 1992. I got one on 12/23/2013, to save my life. I am coming up on 18 months.

My sleeve is inconvenient. Not giving in to my taste buds is maddening. My tongue always want more long after Miss Tummy is done. She is the boss of me and wins every arguement one way or the other. My family understands why I did this to myself and are supportive because we have lost too many family members to the ravages of - not cancer - but obesity

My grandparents, parents, and most of thirteen sets of aunts and uncles are gone now, taken down in their sixties, when a trim few others lived well into their nineties. Mother died at 67. Her mother and all of her eight brothers and sisters lived to their late 90's in good health. Grandma made it to 98.

Now my 60 first cousins are being picked off by obesity one by one in their forties and fifties. My oldest brother died of a heart attack at the age of 47. He weighed 420 pounds and needed a double coffin built and twelve pall bearers.

As you progress, this process gets better. I can eat a cup of food at one sitting and that is fine. I did not nearly need all the food I was eating before. My energy level is great, now. The first two months, I thought I was going to drop from exhaustion from getting up and getting dressed.

It is a crying shame that we are socialized around eating rather than enjoying each other's company. Why should my family care if I eat an apple instead of a huge piece of Aunt Esther's apple pie with two scoops of ice cream? Do I want to hurt her feelings or just go ahead and tape the pie to my hips?

I do hope you can come to terms with your doubts and stay here for support and encouragement. There are indeed people here who struggle with differences between expectations and actual results. What's done is done, so look forward....the best is yet to come. Wondering "if only" is a crazy-maker. I like the idea of focusing on all of the new things you will be able to do as the weight drops off and you begin to recover further out. Eating more nutritiously results in a happier heart, lungs, brain, muscles, nerves, bone, skinn - all of that. And the next thing you know, your pants are falling off and you feel better.

Hang out here with us. I wish you good luck and good health and a better day tomorrow.

[michellemartin961 29]

To be honest I'm pre surgery but I hope and pray to God I don't have these feelings so strongly. After watching hundreds of YT vids some over and over of "the journey" it seems to get better and better for most people. Be glad you are complication free honey. That's the hope. It'll be better I believe. You have much success and happiness ahead of you. Get off the blogs n boards and go live a little. Do something new unrelated to food and see if that takes your mind off of it until the situation improves. Lifting you up n prayer. Latrice

Don't be discouraged from having the surgery based on some of the bad experiences found in the posts on this site. Everyone's journey is so very different! I have always done exceedingly well after surgery (c-section and gallbladder) so I though this would be a breeze too!

Right after the surgery I was up and moving around pretty quickly. The day of discharge my daughter, friend, and I went shopping on Revolucion Street in Tijuana just as we did last year when my daughter had hers. I pooped out 4 stores later ????. Then the border crossing that Friday was delayed for 2 hours! No pain meds, stuck in the back of a 16 passenger van in the heat!

Yup, you guessed it rough ride to San Diego Airport and even rougher ride home! I kept wondering why my experience was so much worse than my daughter's. Well she was 33 then and I am 53. The wonderful thing is that now it is getting better and I lost the 12 lbs of Fluid gain from the hospital and an additional 8 lbs as of Friday!

Eating is different and I've tried things like hummus, scrambled eggs, deviled ham, and chicken salad perhaps a bit early but in small amounts ( 2-3 tablespoons at a time). I am using Fitness Pal to track my food which helps.

What I am getting to is....make the decision that is right for YOU....not anyone else! Realize it isn't an easy thing but the benefits of utilizing every tool at your disposal, including this site as well as FB, family support, books, and recipes for bariatric weight loss are, in my opinion, crucial for success!

Wishing you the best!

Michelle

[Tricebhasstyle 51]

Thanks for the encouragement Michelle!

I am firmly rooted in having this happen for myself that I feel like I could do it myself lol. Where are my surgical gloves and scalpel just kidding but I think I'm ready. You never really know and I accept that for now. I am itching to have this be in the past and to get on with the rest of my life with my little tummy to assist me as long as it can. I am working on making better choices beforehand so hopefully that will make the road that much easier to go. I hope out friend here can get through the tough times like you have and I hope to also.

[Gingi 19]

I was regretting my decision while I was in the hospital and for the first few days at hoe. I was sleeved 5/21 and after I was able to transition from clear to full liquids I a happy with my choice. I a now on puree and having options makes this bearable. I am overjoyed that I only eat a little and I am full. I used to never feel full, I really enjoy that feeling now, it sure beets feeling hungry all the time, I am less obsessed with food now.

Hang in there, the health benefits are so worth it not to mention better choices in fashion! Look at it this way, you can always bring home the left overs and enjoy the deliciousness a couple of more times!

[livingstone 137]

There are ways to make it better.

Firstly, think about taking a single Multivitamin. Ask your surgeon about it - I am on a single Multivitamin a day. When it's only one, it's really not much of a problem to take it.

About dinner parties and not being able to eat normal portions - yes, this is tough. It's all well and good saying 'but that's the choice you made', but I know how different it can feel after the surgery than before it. If you're going to dinner with people you know, and who know you had surgery, then it's fine. They'll know. If they don't, then even having one person there who does know can help, because if conversation turns towards 'OMG you didn't eat much', that person can help change the subject.

But also you can let people know you are watching what you eat. Or just tell them you had a big breakfast/lunch.

You can also get into the habit or organising more dinners yourself. That way you're in control - you can give yourself a smaller plate, you can cook foods that aren't as obvious when you don't eat much. An example is something like a sharing platter where everyone just picks at what is on the table during the meal. No one is keeping track of what you eat, and because you eat slower, you finish at the same time.

I had to learn to be less self-conscious (people really aren't watching what you eat as much as you think) and to enjoy what food I could eat (accept that some yummy food will end up in the bin, don't mourn for what you couldn't eat but instead enjoy being able to eat until you were satisfied and not have to worry about the impact on your weight.

This is a gift - most people who eat delicious food have to choose between heating a healthy amount that won't fill them, or eating an unhealthy amount that will fill them. You don't have to make those choices now - you can eat a small portion AND be full. It's the best of both worlds - satisfying AND healthy.

[*Lexie* 1,486]

@@Stevehud Love this line, "food is what you live ON , not what you live FOR." I am learning that right now and it's an adjustment. I'm getting there though.