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Negative Comments from Family Members



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Ugh!!! Need to vent a little. My dad (who had gastric bypass) made a comment tonight that I won't drop the weight as easily as he or my husband (who also had GP) did because I'm a girl. Well, thanks for the words of encouragement, Dad! I know everyone is different. But just because I'm a woman doesn't mean I can't lose the weight. Ughhhhhhh. Now he's got me worried that I'm doing this for nothing, I'm already afraid I won't lose the weight as it is. I don't need this right now....

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Unfortunately, guys usually do lose faster but that doesn't mean you won't be successful. He was probably just trying to help you calibrate your expectations.

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Yep, guys usually lose faster. You will lose at your own pace. You are doing this for you. Don't let comments like that discourage you.

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I don't really have an expectation on what weight I want to be. I just want to be comfortable. And if I can get back to being a size 13/14 like I was before I got married, I will be perfectly content. But if I become smaller than that, it's always a bonus too. I just want to be healthy, run around with my little girls, and do things that my weight has held me back from. That's all. I don't care about the number, I care about how I feel.

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Don't let this discourage you. My husbands aunt had GB 8 years ago she went from a size 24 to a size 4 and she has maintained her weight loss all these years. I asked her tonight what was her secret.

She said no caffeine, no soda, beer, or wine. Drink lots of Water, eat three small meals a day and three small Snacks. I asked what sort of Snacks she said yogurt or 1/2 banana. I wish you the best of luck and we are all here to support you.

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Anyone who is critical instead of supportive needs to be ignored. I have a very supportive work environment, home andosteoporosis importantly a supportive spouse. I have critics too, but what they have to say weighs a lot less than how those who support me, make me feel.

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You know what? You're right. I love proving people wrong and living above the standard. That's going to be my drive. I will not be who they think I will be. They have no idea what I can accomplish. Everyone is different. No matter what gender you are.

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You know what? You're right. I love proving people wrong and living above the standard. That's going to be my drive. I will not be who they think I will be. They have no idea what I can accomplish. Everyone is different. No matter what gender you are.

My sister is overweight like me and she has been a thorn in my dang side. I don't know if it's a jealousy thing or she's just hating on me or what. When I told her I lost 18 lbs in 8 days her response was well if u lose it fast u gain it back fast. Made me wanna punch her in the throat lol. I've learned to just over look her though. Haters gonna hate right?

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post-254504-14328347615609_thumb.jpg

Someone is always going to say something negative I've come to find out. My sister told me that I can't have the surgery bc then she's going to be the only fat one left in the family. It's just selfishness. I'm finally doing something for just me and no one is going to bring me down. I don't want to look back in ten years and say I wish I did it instead of listening to the haters.

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Let him say what he wants. You prove this to yourself and no one else. You got this, never give up ????

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I don't see what was so negative in his comments. All he said was you likely won't lose weight as easily as a man. He didn't say you wouldn't lose it. What he is saying is just factual. You are taking it too personal. Weight loss is not easy no matter what surgery you have.

Edited by Jadyn

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It may be factual, but he didn't need to make a comment like that that may or may not have discouraged me. I've gotten other negative comments as well from others. I was just venting in general

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    • BabySpoons

      Sometimes reading the posts here make me wonder if some people just weren't mentally ready for WLS and needed more time with the bariatric team psychiatrist. Complaining about the limited drink/food choices early on... blah..blah...blah. The living to eat mentality really needs to go and be replaced with eating to live. JS
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      1. Bypass2Freedom

        We have to remember that everyone moves at their own pace. For some it may be harder to adjust, people may have other factors at play that feed into the unhealthy relationship with food e.g. eating disorders, trauma. I'd hope those who you are referring to address this outside of this forum, with a professional.


        This is a place to feel safe to vent, seek advice, hopefully without judgement.


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        Seems it would be more compassionate not to perform a WLS on someone until they are mentally ready for it. Unless of course they are on death's door...

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