Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Being a Big Guy and Dating



Recommended Posts

I love gowalking's suggestion, GREAT IDEA. Meet people in your situation, and make it work for both of you. Walks, gym, biking ect.....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Daveo,

I dated successfully at 305. I get many more dating opportunities at 222. I am convinced that women have have evolved senses to seek out healthy mates (basic reproductive needs). Even if kids are not the goal, that shapes most of our tastes and attraction. (Read "Why Women Have Sex" by Cindy M. Meston)

But outside appearance aside is what the weight loss did to me on the inside. I took control of my health, which gave me more confidence, and confidence is sexy and attractive to women. So get your head right before you write your profile. Do NOT ever say I'm lonely, want a friend...with online dating its sales. So sell yourself as "I am starting an adventure and there is no turning back, want to join me..." Project lots of confidence and that will be attractive to women.

I have some posts on this site on how to do online dating better. Let me know if you have any questions. Google dating, there are many jerks who have sites about how to sleep with women, but just because their motives are bad, doesn't mean their insights into how to attract women are necessarily wrong. One guy who I find morally repugnant had a great tip...make a goal to approach 25 women a day, and make notes about each one. His point was the only way to get confident is to practice.

One important note...make a list of the qualities that YOU want. Yes you want love, but create a profile of the woman you want in your life. What will she look like, what does she like to do, what is her job, what is her personality, intelligence. Until you do that, you are shooting in the dark. You have to have the confidence to say "look you are a nice person, and you will be a perfect match for someone, but not me."

Confidence is not free. It takes work to get it. But it is a skill that can be developed. You are on a new path, congrats on the weight loss so far, and it will only get better. If you plan and prepare before you act, you will do better.

One other note, you will cope with your feelings of loneliness better IF you have a plan of action. I can do without many things if I have some hope there will be something better down the road.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

    • Sandra Austin Tx

      I’m 6 days post op as of today. I had the gastric bypass 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×