Worried

[Bandora 136]

I also feel that by bringing it up you may make her feel uncomfortable. I think encouraging her to walk with you or cook a healthy meal with you can make her feel more open to asking you questions about WLS or at least make her feel less attacked. I never liked when people ( including my dr.) mentioned my weight. I knew I was fat and it made me defensive. Sadly most people need to hit their personal " rock bottom" before they seek help. Good luck to her & congrats on your success

[Djmohr 6,965]

This is truly the toughest to deal with because you know that a surgical intervention would definitely help and prolong her life.

For me it took another crappy health diagnosis of stage 3 kidney disease but it was in fact that specialist who told me I was looking at dialysis and an early death. He asked me one simple question: have you ever considered weight loss surgery?

That was what it took for me to immediately begin working down this path.

I would say I felt absolutely miserable at this stage and probably could have died from a heart attack at any time.bthank goodness my heart was actually still in good shape.

I was absolutely ready and it worked for me.

I know as everyone else that if a family member had brought up this idea I would have done the exact opposite. All you can do is be supportive and hope she gets ready before it is too late.

God bless you and your family.

[Bandista 7,466]

I hope the stars line up and she finds the worthiness to choose herself and her health but meanwhile she is very lucky to have a sister like you. So many of us struggle with issues around deserving happiness. I had no idea until after WLS that this would be such a change in my life. I didn't know how unworthy I felt. That has all changed and I'm so grateful.

[kwcrnp 63]

Before I decided on WLS, my Mom who had lost 80lbs on WW and has kept it off for 20 yrs, asked my teenage dgt to talk to me about my wt. I was furious with my Mom but knew that my dgt was simply put in the middle and I worked hard to not be negative with her. I was very defensive with my Mom though!

But, the talk did sink in and eventually I decided on LB surgery. I only told my dgt. She was so supportive through the 5 mon of lifestyle changes and I only told my Mom once I had a date for surgery. Needless to say, both have been very supportive post-op.

It's very hard not to get defensive when approached by family.