Confession

[snowkitten 371]

@drmeow – Yes I’ve done quite a bit of soul searching and have come up with a few reasons to my weight issues. Started when I was very young. The genes in my family are actually to be extremely skinny, but I have CVID (an immune deficiency) that makes me sick a lot. When I was an infant I would get seizures when I got over heated/a fever. This made my mom switch my time schedule so I lived at night and slept during the day (can’t be very active at night), and then a particularly bad seizure had the doctors convincing my mom to put me on a medication. This medication, while saved my life, slowed me down and increased my appetite. Since I was living at night, food became an activity. Then things turned emotional. I had gained a little weight and got teased by peers and siblings. That’s when I started eating for comfort (which ended up being compounded by many hard times and abuse). Somewhere along the way (probably about the time I started getting sick a lot) I started eating for energy, that’s my worse habit, I get sick, have no energy, and to make it through my many obligations I grab a high carb snack for a quick lift. And because im sick, I don’t have the energy to exercise it off. Now all that compounded by the fact that I have PCOS, and an extreamly stressfull life (wont go into it) and its no wonder im overweight lol. I am working on all this though. I realize that it wont all be fixed right away, or even within a year. Im well aware that its an ongoing progress, I just keep sliping .

Thank you for the suggestion of the book, I will look into that. Is there a specific book of the series you would suggest?

One think I would suggest is finding a new treat for infusion days. Sometimes it is less of a struggle to replace a habit than to just eliminate it. Either a non-food reward (manicure, new lipstick), or a reward that fits in your plan (I have Muscle Milk "Cookies and Cream" and make a milkshake as a treat).

That it an excellent idea! Im gonna try that this Friday

[snowkitten 371]

It's interesting to read your post. I was 240 when I started preparing for surgery. I was so done overeating. Done thinking about food and letting it be what I used to Celebrate the end of the week or whatever it is I thought I had survived. It wasn't my reward if it was making me miserable and unhealthy and most definitely defeated. I was 220 on surgery day and today 17 months later I'm 186. I've gotten down to 174. I've struggled since Easter to get back on my wagon. Sugar is like heroine. Talking my self out of eating it is like battle. It can't be in my house and I have to keep syntax nectar and yogurt close to help curb cravings. I was about 185 most of my life. I wonder if my body likes a set weight of 185? I don't even have to eat that much to gain. I am not accepting the idea of my body liking a set weight. It's hard now but way easier than it was before. I am happy. My surgeon is happy but I told him I know I could get down to 160. I could step it up. So I'm working on it. Thanks for writing your post.

I sure hope the body liking a set point isn't the case. Most of my life i was around 260-280.... That would put me right were my body likes to be... It would definitely explain why its so hard to get over this weight though (i keep going between 274-278). I wonder if we get below the hurdle if it will get easier, or even harder?

Ugh, yes, sugar is my most horrible habit as well. Carbs in general. I made the HUGE mistake of believing that a calorie deficit was a calorie deficit no matter what the calories were made of and i could still lose. For my body, WRONG. Me and carbs dont mix. Took me 8 months to figure it out, but i know now.

Let me know how things go after you get over your hurdle. Good luck!!!