female only Attention from opposite sex..I'm clueless

[Healthy_life2 8,324]

After years of being invisible to men. I'm not quite sure what to think about attention I get now. I am happily married and not looking. I am baffled that men even look at me. I have my wedding ring on. What is going on????

A younger man asked if he could pay for my groceries. I told him that was sweet but no... I have it...He was fine and smiled and went on his way.

A month later I had two younger men in front of me in a grocery store check out. They insisted on buying my groceries. They would not take no for an answer. I brought home a free dinner for me and my husband. Is this a new way to pick up women that I am clueless about?

Holiday's I was at a sports pub for a drink. Bar tender asked for my ID. (I'm an old chick) I said..I'm a grand ma and you want my ID? He laughed and said he wanted to know if I was close to his age. My drink arrived and he paid for it. ..Again I'm clueless.

I guess I should be flattered about the attention. I'm so used to being invisible that I don't pick up on what the motivation is from men sometimes...laughing at myself. I'm clueless.

Does the attention seem a bit amplified because I'm not used to it? Does it mellow out and go away?

[Pepper123 320]

Tehehehehehehe...well besides the fact that u are married i bet it does one good....

[Healthy_life2 8,324]

@@Pepper123

I guess it's nice to get a bit of attention. But it's strange at the same time...Just wanted to ask..Do women do the same to men after weight loss surgery? Do men get the same reaction?

[AvaFern 3,516]

Well you look fantastic, no wonder men are buying your groceries and paying for your drinks!

I don't know if it is amplified now or if it goes away later. I have spent my 20's being both thin and fat and I can always tell the difference in the way men treat me when I'm large as opposed to small. I think as a result of this I have developed a bit of a standoffish personality, which is not terribly attractive. I don't make eye contact, I don't express any interest, and they leave me alone. To be honest, I suppose there's still the inner fat girl that is afraid that if I am friendly and warm, men will just treat me like garbage like has always been the case, and then it's just me that isn't good enough, and not the fact that being fat made me undesirable.

But, I say enjoy the attention. You've certainly earned it and when you're done getting free groceries, you can go home an enjoy that dinner with your husband!

[Pepper123 320]

LOL@@jenn1 all the dudes i know are in shape....So i would not know!

[Monasongbird_38 73]

Well, I was in the grocery store one day with my three younger kids and this guy walks up to me and asked if I was married? as if he could not see that

I was wearing my wedding ring and also being trailed by three kids ...Later, I realized this guy had been following me from aisle to aisle. .Really? ....But I have to admit that I was flattered!!!

Edited March 23, 2015 by Monasongbird_38

[Healthy_life2 8,324]

@@AvaFern

Yep, It's my inner fat girl. I have that standoffish personality as well. I'm trying to shake it.

[Healthy_life2 8,324]

@@Monasongbird_38

Wow, Maybe it's my age or lack of experience with this... but men really do this?

Yes, Take it as a compliment!

[LipstickLady 25,682]

Look at you! I'd pay for your groceries!!

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

LOL!

The groceries thing HAS to be genetic. It's like they just killed a mastodon for you and brought you the best cuts.

Love it!

Try to relax and enjoy it.

[Healthy_life2 8,324]

@@VSGAnn2014

*laughing* I'm trying to envision women standing around the grocery store waiting to buy a guy's groceries. I guess food is the way to your heart. LOL

[Healthy_life2 8,324]

No offense to men that are reading this thread. But I would love to hear a guy's take on all this.

[blacktee92675 120]

I've been a guy all my life, and this is the first I've ever heard of guys offering to buy groceries for a woman, not their wife, daughter, cousin, etc... I've been married for 30 years, so I might not be the best source. Still, I am a guy and do have single friends, so would think I would have heard of this approach. Good job! Enjoy the ego boost; needed or not it never hurts.

[Healthy_life2 8,324]

@@blacktee92675

I also have been married for 20+ years. So, I have been out of the being single stage for many years. Maybe things have changed in the world of pick up tactics.

[Healthy_life2 8,324]

@@LipstickLady

My husband told me instead of buying grocery's for one dinner meal. I should buy groceries for a month and see if anyone wants to pay.