SERIOUSLY? REALLY? YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS!

[IcanMakeit 1,318]

Before I state my opinion on this controversy, let me preface by saying that I really do not enjoy being the target of judgmental, know-it-all postings. That being said, I was nodding my head in agreement when I read the original post. I also believe that people who allow themselves to be so overly affected by some random person's disapproval, even if expressed rudely, are too fragile for their own good and may need more help than an internet support site can offer. I can understand feeling put down, getting mad, or annoyed or even wanting to strike back. What I don't think is healthy is to allow that person's statements to affect your stability. I don't think it's too judgmental or mean to point out that people who are that sensitive may need help. That is what I got from the original post. This does not mean that I think those sensitive people don't belong here, just that they could benefit from additional help.

As far as the definition of "rudeness" goes. We all have our own reactions to how things are worded. Your "frankness" might by my "rudeness." Although I think as adults, we should all go out of our way to avoid treating others in a way that we would not like to be treated, we can't predict or control what other people will feel about our statements. On the one hand I agree with "first do no harm," but on the other hand I understand that we sometimes don't agree on what "harm" is.

[wannaBthinsoon 1,634]

I rushed home just to read this thread.

[PMJ 55]

All of you ….is this what getting "sleeved" does to you? And would some one please explain what a "flouncer" is?

Thanks…I am still learning.

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

Earlier you said 'sorry for your loss', again I think there is some confusion - I have MS, but I'm not dying. I'm not professionally frustrated either - I'm a stay at home mom now, and I find that to be really fulfilling.

Yeah, that was me, not @@LipstickLady . I apologize for imagining that the loss of your profession as a therapist was tough on you and for saying I was sorry for your loss.

My bad.

Edited March 23, 2015 by VSGAnn2014

[Babbs 14,681]

All of you ….is this what getting "sleeved" does to you?

What? This is just a normal discussion on an internet forum. In any internet forum there are disagreements and hurt feelings. Although, maybe some on this particular forum may be a little more sensitive than normal because of the emotional toll being overweight and/or having major surgery can cause.

And would some one please explain what a "flouncer" is?

Flounce

flounce (flaʊns)

v. flounce, flounced, flounc•ing,

- To leave an internet group or thread with exaggerated drama; deleting posts, notifying mods and or group users, and cross-posting on other groups to draw attention to the drama. Comes from the original use of gathering up skirts and petticoats and leaving in dramatic, impatient and exaggerated movements.

Edited March 23, 2015 by Babbs

[GreenEyes604 753]

WOW.... It's amazing how I've been called all kinds of names by some of the posters here, as well as been accused of some pretty nasty things. To those people I say, "I'm so glad that you know me so well that you know what I'm thinking...YOU'RE WRONG! Next, who died and made you all Gods that you know how everything is supposed to work?....WRONG AGAIN! As has been mentioned previously, it seems that more of the "haters" of my OP have been the ones seeking attention. I said what I said and left it at that.

And lastly... with every name I've been called, and everything wrong that I supposedly have done, I think I'll go sit in the corner, cry, and wallow in my own pity party..... DEFINITELY WRONG!!!

Now when you can remind me again which one of my bills you'll be paying this month, maybe I'll care what you think or feel. But until that time comes.... FRANKLY SCARLET, I DON'T GIVE A DAMN!!!

[Elode 8,093]

So we should or shouldn't eat at Red Robin?

[wannaBthinsoon 1,634]

@@Elode where have U been?! lol Quite a thread 'eh?!

[Elode 8,093]

@@PMJ Lol!! no this is NOT what getting sleeved does to "most" people but I think sometimes people get hungry and pissy (Think snickers commercial) and fat loss /breakdown does release hormones (fact) so the really pissy people should be happy because they are breaking down some serious fat!!!!

[Elode 8,093]

@@wannaBthinsoon Hell I don't know what's going on! I can't keep up with it all...something about Red Robin and broccoli is all I got along with some potential flouncing ( Or perhaps it was made good on?) due to hurt feelings and some depressing red robin chicken maybe?? Throw in two therapist / and 5 mind readers.......blue is purple because Red sat on a roof?? That's all I got

Edited March 23, 2015 by Elode

[Babbs 14,681]

@@wannaBthinsoon Hell I don't know what's going on! I can't keep up with it all...something about Red Robin and broccoli is all I got along with some potential flouncing ( Or perhaps it was made good on?) due to hurt feelings and some depressing red robin chicken maybe??

LOL

[Cleo's Mom 257]

Here is the original post that was the cause of this thread starting:

Posted March 14, 2015 - 2:39 PM

#1

I have been down lately, and questioning my choice. When I go there, I realize that there is no going back. Stomach is gone, can't come back. Then I am even more depressed. food, food everywhere, and am not allowed to eat it. I think of all the things that I have enjoyed, and wonder if I will ever make the transition to enjoyment elsewhere. I feel like such a "weirdo" not being able to eat a typical, "normal" portion. I get a kids meal and can eat less than half. I keep telling everyone that this won't be forever, but I really don't know if that is true. This week I have "only" lost 2 lbs. I question if it is because I have added "real" food to my diet. Then I know how rediculous this is, since I have only added the average of 300 - 400 calories. Then I wonder if I am in "starvation mode." Does that happen with wls

She says she is depressed over the loss of her stomach, not being able to eat normal portions - in other words - she is having some doubts and feeling depressed about her choice. This is perfectly normal. Many who go through WLS experience this sense of loss and frustration.

She later clarified that it was a Red Robin kids meal of chicken skewers and steamed broccoli but some jumped to conclusions (a new thread she started where she explained again).

But here is what she got in return about the comments made to her post(s):

-She is thin skinned

-Overly affected (by comments)

-Too fragile

-Comments affected her stability

-Such an emotional reaction

-Weak minded

-Mental health not up to par

-Uncontrollable bout of depression (about comments)

-Off kilter

-Can't handle the heat then get out of the kitchen

-Depressed because someone said something mean.

-If the only thing you have ever or ever will love is fast food then, yeah, you made the wrong choice. IS EATING ALL YOU EVER DID? or think about life at McDonald's with a kids meal and pout.

-I suggest you go back to your surgeon and have them immediately reattach your stomach.

-She had surgery just a few weeks ago and you think she should just go ahead and have it - why don't you just drive her McDonald's while you're at it?

Wow! There is nothing in her post that even remotely comes close to the inaccurate, not to mention insensitive comments that were made.

She was not depressed over comments but over the loss of her stomach and the loss of food and fearful she would never eat normal foods again.

But just take a look at the comments she got and didn't deserve. And to make matters worse, those who made them defend them and if someone is insulted by them (she didn't even say that) then of course that's their fault because they're....well see above

[wannaBthinsoon 1,634]

Whew! That wore me out. Nighty night.

[Elode 8,093]

@@Cleo's Mom Well that just sounds odd...people really said that stuff? Like actual words typed out? That doesn't sound right. It seems like I read that post and responded to it but nothing like that. It Seems like maybe she didn't quite realize what all could happen with the sleeve and the adjustments that you have to make. It's almost impossible to know the outcome of this surgery but maybe she didn't get enough information in the pre-op stages. It can be hard to adjust especially if you were ill informed or didn't do any research of your own? Hopefully it's just a phase and she will get better as time passes and she progresses. It's too late to change now. I feel bad for her. Not everyone can adjust so quickly. I feel like I was prepared and ready so I didn't have that depression stage so I can't really relate but with that being said she shouldn't have been made to feel worse if that's what indeed happened. All I know is I'm keeping my a** out of red robin and if I ever do go I'm not telling ANY of you!!

Edited March 23, 2015 by Elode

[PMJ 55]

@@PMJ Lol!! no this is NOT what getting sleeved does to "most" people but I think sometimes people get hungry and pissy (Think snickers commercial) and fat loss /breakdown does release hormones (fact) so the really pissy people should be happy because they are breaking down some serious fat!!!!

Thanks for a good little chuckle….with out hurting everyone's feeling why don't we all have a snickers bar..

Okay since that would probably start a riot I will have one for all of us. (PreOp broth doesn't begin for 6days)

Please look up at the sky tonight…and take a very deep breath

Edited March 23, 2015 by PMJ