bikrchk 1,313 Posted March 12, 2015 So, small rant here... Why do we care what others think of our decision to take control of our health by having WLS? I see post after post here with folks who are afraid to let anyone know, (OMG, what if my <fill in relationship here> with NO medical training doesn't approve)? Someone told me I "cheated" and now my feelings are hurt. You KNOW better than that or you wouldn't have chosen WLS in the first place! For cheating to have occurred, there has to be a winner and a loser and you are in competition with NO ONE in this battle for your health! I get that our health decisions are no one's business, but that's not what I'm talking about here. Tell who you want, or not, but pull up your big girl panties\big boy britches and owning your decision!. If you HAVE been open and your "friend" de-friends you because you didn't cave to their wishes, they weren't your friend to begin with! If they hate you for getting healthy because you're now "skinnier" than they are... same thing! You deserve better friends! If it's a family member, (that's rough, and shame on them), but see a counselor if the relationship is worth preserving. If their objection is about fear over the risks associated with surgery, drag them to your bariatric surgeon's office and have a medical professional educate them and answer their questions\concerns. You may not change a mind, but it will probably help them be less fearful about the process and show you care enough to have an open dialogue. End rant Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JamieLogical 8,713 Posted March 12, 2015 (edited) Humans are social creatures that form relationships. While I agree that you shouldn't let others' opinions influence YOUR decision to have surgery, I think it is perfectly legitimate to be concerned that your friends and family might not support your decision. WLS is a huge life change and, just like you might want your parents to approve of your choice of spouse or where you go to college, you would want them to approve of this decision as well. If they DON'T approve, that doesn't mean you shouldn't go through with it. But it's perfectly natural to want the ones you love to stand behind your major life decisions. Edited March 12, 2015 by JamieLogical Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
amz85 18 Posted March 12, 2015 I am selective in who I choose not because I am ashamed but because it is MY journey! I don't want to always be the one who had the WLS I just want to be me. If anyone hears and asked me I'll be open to any questions and I'll respond to any rudeness, but the pple who are closest to me know and that's good enough. If there are days where I feel a little embarrassed that my life ended up at this point, those feelings are also my own and I am entitled to them as we are all. Life is about process and learning and growing and doing our best. This is a rly brave choice we are all making or have made and as it would be ideal if all anyone ever felt was pride, everyone's journey is different and should be respected and supported! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
donald0717 21 Posted March 12, 2015 OMG!!! I love this post. To me having WLS is like giving up a drug. To hell what anybody has to say or think. What's important is that I want to live and if you get in my way, to hell with you!!! For many, worrying about what people think of them is why they eat so much. This is a time to put yourself first and is maybe the first selfish thing you might have done. I say, go ahead and do it!!! Good luck to those who have done it, those in the process of doing it, and to those who will it in the future. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ProjectMe 909 Posted March 12, 2015 What matters more than others opinions is our own views of obesity and WLS. Our own beliefs are mirror images of our loved ones beliefs. If we do not take the time to learn about obesity, research the why's of WLS, and take time to explain to loved ones in a comprehensible manner...then we are part of the problem. It's easy to throw away others opinions...it's much harder to look at ourselves and where we fit in to the problem. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites