Anyone frustrated with ageists?

[Jkapp923 10]

I am becoming increasingly annoyed by older people on this site. Though it is not the intention of some posters, many people come off very condescending in their responses. I am twenty three, my way of life is different than someone who is in their late thirties and forties. My relationship with things like alcohol is different. If someone posts that they just turned twenty one or are about to turn twenty one, I am not going to berate them because of their desire to be a normal twenty year old. I will let them know the complications and that certain things will not work with having surgery. Support. Not tell them they are an alcoholic and have a problem.

My rant got a bit specific but is anyone else having these problems/frustrations?

[bikrchk 1,313]

I don't think it's ALL about age. People gonna judge if you put it out there. And as an "older person", (LOL 'cause I refuse to grow up, especially since I got healthy enough to relive my youth as a thin person), I'm single now and party more than I did in my 20's! Do I have to watch the quantity now? Yes, more than I did 100 pounds ago, both because of the extra calories and for the fact I can't physically hold\metabolize what I used to. I'd not expect you to give up one bit of your youth because you got sleeved! I WOULD advise anyone young or old to take reasonable care of themselves post-op... Get your Protein, take your supplements and make the healthy choice at least 80% of the time so you're successful with your weight loss and live a long and healthy life!

[Jkapp923 10]

But a ewponse like yours is not what is happening. Your response is helpful and supportive.

[bikrchk 1,313]

Thanks! But like I said, judgers gonna judge, haters gonna hate. I'm 48 years old, like to party and ride a big ass motorcycle for fun! And yes, I do limit alcohol when I'm on two wheels, judgers!. I need every ounce of coordination I can muster to hold up the big ass bike especially now that I'm smaller! I like to have fun, but I don't have a death wish. Certainly don't act my age, but neither do the folks I hang out with now that I think about it! Age is just a number!

A piece of advice now that you've called me helpful and supportive... And this goes beyond folks judging about alcohol intake. Let the "frustration" go. People can only piss you off if you let them. Don't give them that much power!

Edited March 11, 2015 by bikrchk

[ProjectMe 909]

I don't think its the age of the posters that is causing the problem. I think it's personal conviction. There are some on this site who take their surgeons plan as suggestions or guidelines, then choose to do their own thing. There are some who follow their surgeon's plan period. Then you've got posters who fall somewhere between the spectrums. How you respond to posts has a lot to do with where you are on this spectrum also.

Btw, I rarely drank in my 20's. I didn't need alcohol to have a good time. It didn't stop me from hanging out with my crazy sorority sisters, frat brothers, teammates or keep me from clubbing/bar hopping.

[Jkapp923 10]

Thats not the point either. It is an age thing. Its the I'm older and know better mentality. It is the condescension.

I do not need alcohol to have a good time but imagine that you are newly 21. You would want the experience. I brew beer. I am in a homebrewing club. Beer is central to who I am around. I can easily not drink while out but it will be a strain as time goes on to be out and not participate. I will follow the rules but ny lifestyle does not mean I am or will become an alcoholic.

[ProjectMe 909]

@@Jkapp923 My point is as valid as yours. I do not agree with you about the age thing. And that's okay.

Regarding the 21 thing, I'm a different person than you with different experiences. I didn't Celebrate my 21st birthday by drinking. Just not my thing and I don't feel that I missed out on anything.

About the alcoholism thing...I can't speak for everyone. I can only speak for myself and what I've researched and/or heard from my bariatric team. I won't share that here as it really doesn't matter what I think. I encourage you, if you haven't already, to research alcohol after WLS surgery and check with your bariatric team. Then do you

[Swampdoggie 477]

Lord, I'm 50 and alcohol may be the hardest change of all for me. I love a mug of beer and miss my glass of wine to unwind at night. I know when I'm further down the road i'll be adding wine back in and probably LI iced tea too. I agree w @@ProjectMe that personal conviction seems more of a separator than age, just from what I've noticed, but I'm not really on any of the age forums. I so respect the 20 somethings making this change and commitment early on. I wish I'd not wasted so much time. @@Jkapp923 continue to do your thing proudly.

Btw my darling 28 yo stepdaughter is living with us and she cracks me up every single day with her hilarious antics. I LOVE her spirit and her energy. I hope she enjoys her life to the hilt and keeps paving her own strong path. I wish I'd been as strong and people smart as her when I was her age.