Pre op worries

[Onyx999 4]

I have my first appt to discuss WLS next week, but I have to ask: Am I the only one worried about the aftermath? Im 20 yrs old and im wondering what effect it would have on the rest on my life. Obviously we all want surgery to lose the weight for whatever reasons, and so do I. I know i want the fat gone, and ive tried other methods to no avail. So i question surgery, is it for me? I decide to go for it and now im wondering what life will be like afterwards (im not even afraid of the surgery itself) Can i still get drunk with friends and act my age while im in my 20's? When im 30, can i eat dinner or cake at my friends wedding? These things I wonder about almost constantly (im a natural worrywart by the way) Granted losing the weight is more important to me,

What if when these kind of "Life Experiences" pop up I regret it all? Definately something to think about right? Can someone please give me some advice? Id appreciate it very much.

[lele109 16]

I am still in the pre op phase myself and have my own set of worries as a 34 yr old...but I will say....I have a good friend who had the surgery over 5 yrs ago, she seems to live a very normal life. Basically she eats what she wants, jus not a full portion size..I have seen her have a glass of wine at a dinner party. she has also maintained her weight loss (100lbs) very well. She looks amazing! I have asked her several times if she would do it again and her answer is always the same...."without a doubt".

[Onyx999 4]

Thats definately comforting Thank you Im not an alcoholic or anything, but i turn 21 next month and the thought of not being able to go out drinking like a normal girl my age seemed like id be missing out on life experiences that maybe one day id regret not doing. But as of right now im missing out on everything because

im too self conscious to really enjoy anything, and i know it probably sounds crazy but half the time i dont even want to leave my room. Part of my reasons for surgery is because im tired of being the fat girl and tired of missing out on my life just because im too imcomfortable to live it. Does that sound nuts? Lol plus im not sure which WLS to get. Thinking either RNY bypass, or that gastrectomy where they just remove excess stomach without bypassing anything. What are you getting and why did you pick that one? Thank you for

Replying by the way maybe its a self conscious thing, but i always feel like i annoy ppl or talk to much cuz im paranoid about everything haha

[Djmohr 6,965]

@@Onyx999, have you talked with the phsycologist about your worries. They can really help you work through some of your feelings.

I do think the idea of going out and getting drunk with friends might be a bit concerning and I understand that it is a part of life however you will have to be very careful with this. It is a known fact that many bariatric patients trade one addiction for another and ultimately become alcoholics. It is one of the things your surgeon will warn you about.

My surgeons office actually made me sign a contract stating I would not touch alcohol for the first year. They figure by that time you have built healthy food and drink habit. Also liquor has a lot of calories so it could cause you to gain if you drink a lot of it.

You are not crazy for thinking about all of these things, we all do it. The reality for me so far is that your taste changes and most of those things are not even appealing anymore.

I started getting heavy in my 20's and now I am 51. I wish I could turn back time and do this in my 20s. I feel like I gave up so much of my life being obese. If I had to do it all over again, I would make the decision to do this in my 20s so I could enjoy more of my life. That of course is easy for me to say as all of those experiences are behind me and I realize that they just were not important.

I think if you talk through some of your worries with your phsycologist it might help you.

Good luck to you, please keep us posted on your progress as you move forward.

[Jesser 295]

I can see where you're coming from. My early 20's was one of the funnest times in my life for sure. But honestly that contributed to my weight problem. All the late night drinking and eating at 2am really took its toll on me lol but would I change a thing? Thats a hard one.

[joatsaint 2,814]

Well, you definitely are not alone. I was just as worried as you are about life after the sleeve.

Even before I started losing a significant amount of weight, I was anxious. I had been overweight for 40 years. I knew how to be fat. Now I had to learn to be thin. I don't know how to be thin!!!!!!! But I'm working on it.

Plus, after being overweight for so long, losing weight was a dream I had given up on. So for the longest time, I kept expecting something to go wrong and I'd gain the weight back.

I'm 48 and over 2 years post-op. Life is very normal, pretty much the same as it was pre-op. The major change is that I have control over my eating. I don't have food cravings that are out of control anymore, there's nothing I CAN'T eat (it's just in smaller portions) and I can still drink alcohol (but I get drunk much quicker).

It took me many months to embrace the idea that my weight was finally under my control and I was finally at a normal weight.

Take it a day at a time and eventually the dream will become reality.

I have my first appt to discuss WLS next week, but I have to ask: Am I the only one worried about the aftermath? Im 20 yrs old and im wondering what effect it would have on the rest on my life. Obviously we all want surgery to lose the weight for whatever reasons, and so do I. I know i want the fat gone, and ive tried other methods to no avail. So i question surgery, is it for me? I decide to go for it and now im wondering what life will be like afterwards (im not even afraid of the surgery itself) Can i still get drunk with friends and act my age while im in my 20's? When im 30, can i eat dinner or cake at my friends wedding? These things I wonder about almost constantly (im a natural worrywart by the way) Granted losing the weight is more important to me,
What if when these kind of "Life Experiences" pop up I regret it all? Definately something to think about right? Can someone please give me some advice? Id appreciate it very much.

[lele109 16]

@@Onyx999 I personally am getting the gastric sleeve because it seems a bit more "simple" and my surgeon thought it would be best for me. However, your situation may be different....you need to discuss that with your physician and decide based on what your goals are. And I understand missing out on life....I became over weight during pregnancy and went into a deep depression. It wasn't until I turned 30 that I realized I could live a full life being overweight. Now, I am on the verge of turning 35 and feel the complications of the weight...knee and back pain, high cholesterol, short of breath, now I want to get healthy so I don't end up with chronic health problems. We all have our fears and doubts somewhere along the road. I am here for you anytime you need to talk...today I am confident and feeling great about the idea of WLS....but tomorrow I just might be flipping out again. ??? It is a true roller-coaster ride.

[Stevehud 1,790]

eventually you will be able to eat whatever you like to a degree, yont be able to eat as muchby a lot. what you have to do is adapt, you need to find things that replace food, and alcohol, can you go drink 12 beers and get trashed? no, good luck getting one beer in, unlesss you nurse it and since most beers have a huge amount of carbs and sugar and calories you really wouldnt want to. SO what about hard alcohol, well with a smaller stomach alcohol is moving into your intestines faster than normally which means it hits your bloodstream a LOT faster and harder, I have heard it said sleevers absorb alcohol into the blood at a rate 5 to 7 times faster than a non sleever would. Even more so for a bypass patient. so you have to be careful i did a half shot during the superbowl, and really felt it, and not only did i feel it, it also put me in a stall for 4 days, so i dont advise it. besides be the sober one , its easily worth the weight loss.i wish i had done it in my twenties id trade drunkenness for being thin and not being the fat one in the group anyday.

[JamieLogical 8,708]

I think you are wise to be "worrying" about these things. It means you are considering the long-term consequences of the surgery and not deciding impulsively, which is commendable for a 20-year-old!

Life will definitely be different for you than someone who doesn't have WLS. You will miss out on crazy nights of drinking 28 shots (I wouldn't recommend it anyway!) or drinking 12 beers while gambling all day in a casino in Vegas. I've had alcohol a couple of times now post-op (I'm six months out). And my experience is that I get drunk on VERY LITTLE alcohol now. Like one drink and I am sloppy drunk. However, I seem to sober up a lot faster than I used to too.

What I would be concerned about at your age if you do drink post WLS is making sure you are doing it in a safe environment and are not in a position to have to drive. Because you will get drunk on so very little alcohol, it would be easy for you to get to a level where you are very impaired and could be taken advantage of. And I wouldn't trust any of the normal "rules" about when it's safe to drive. You should make a rule for yourself right now that if you have ANY alcohol at all, you shouldn't drive, period. It would just be far too difficult to judge how much alcohol would put you over the legal limit and how long afterward it would take for you to fall back below the legal limit.

Be safe!

[bikrchk 1,313]

I'm 47 and all I can say is I do it ALL as a postop. Most of the time, I eat what I like in very small quantities. Beer with dinner? Errr... no. Can't do that anymore, but get drunk with my friends, ya, occasionally. I almost always REGRET it afterwards and I'm a bit of a "light weight" (literally) now, but alcohol is not a problem in general. I DO have to work it in around food since eating\drinking together are a no no. It makes me uncomfortable, so I just don't anymore. The calories... are a different story and will still catch up with me if I indulge too often.

I HAVE made major changes, do get that wrong. I exercise regularly now, make sure I get my 70+g Protein, all supplements and weigh once per week, (no more). I can't over eat anymore period. If I eat too much sugar, (it has to be WAY too much), I'll dump painfully, (just not worth it). My relationship with food is forever changed.

So you don't have to change EVERYTHING, but everything will change if you hope to be successful. I'm definitely NOT sorry I did this and wish it was available when I was in MY 20's. Maybe I would't be trying to relive them now!

[Goatfarmer 29]

I am one week post op gastric sleeve and am doing really well. I am 66 years old and on the opposite end of the lifecycle. My reasons for wls were improving health and mobility in order to enjoy the rest of my life. I was wondering what methods you have already tried and also if you already have medical issues.? Your fears are normal for sure. The alcohol issue is a moot one for me as I do not drink but if you have problems with alcohol would address that ASAP. Wish you well on this journey.

[blashlee 509]

I'm 27 and pre-op. I'm having gastric bypass on 4/6/15. I have all the same concerns you are, but I'm beginning to weigh the potential positives over the potential negatives.

Your first year will be difficult. You're going to have to relearn how to eat and drink and maintain your new lifestyle of Protein, Vitamins, exercise etc. My doctor's post op instructions ban alcohol for a year. Others have had alcohol within their first year. Every body is different, but my doctor boasts a low number of patients with post op complications and problems if they adhere to her instructions.

The things I worry most about are being isolated from my friends. They love to eat, and they're not against an all day Mimosa Sunday Funday. Then I think about what I was doing that caused me to gain so much weight. The bulk of my weight was gained after I turned 20. I had a boyfriend who worked in fast food/nightlife industry. Then I turned 21. I went out to drink a lot. After drinking, we ate greasy food to end the night. The next day you eat shitty food to nurse your hangover. It was cyclical. I attribute a lot of my problems with food to the social aspect of it. We eat to Celebrate, we eat to catch up, we drink to destress from the work week etc.

I won't be able to do that anymore. Food for me has to be nutrition only; not to Celebrate, not to cope, not for boredom. You'll have to learn to eat to live, not live to eat. And it's going to be really hard. And if your friends are your age and not dealing with the same struggles you are, it's going to be harder because they aren't going to be able to offer the type of support you'll need.

I agree with @@Djmohr, you need to express all of your concerns to a therapist or psychologist. And you should find a support group for WLS patients and see if you can't find a WLS buddy or mentor, especially to get you through the first year. Good luck with whatever you decide <3

[Onyx999 4]

@@lele yeah im bouncing between bypass and vsg so far but i havent even spoken to a doctor yet. My appr is next week, and I just want to have my own opinion and my own knowledge of pros/cons of surgery before i talk to him. and i totally understand the roller coaster! Last night i felt all dark and cryptic wondering what effect WLS would have later in life (the bummer ones) and right now im happy and excited

[Onyx999 4]

Thank you all for replying! I just wana say that im not an alcoholic lol i didnt realize last night that ppl had probs with alcoholism post op. I probably couldve used better examples, but what i meant was that i was worried about irreversible effects that WLS will have because to me, despite the fact that this weight issue is so important to me, long term effects are something to think about.

They should be considered, especially since im a natural worry wart But one thing ppl could not say is that im rushing into it or not considering the rest of my life and potential limitations.

[Onyx999 4]

I think you are wise to be "worrying" about these things. It means you are considering the long-term consequences of the surgery and not deciding impulsively, which is commendable for a 20-year-old!

Life will definitely be different for you than someone who doesn't have WLS. You will miss out on crazy nights of drinking 28 shots (I wouldn't recommend it anyway!) or drinking 12 beers while gambling all day in a casino in Vegas.

Thank you I know my worrying can be a little overboard sometimes, but im only 20 and i want to know about these kinds of limitations. Not that

Im an alcoholic or a food addict and these limitations probably wont stop me from getting surgery, but as a pre op i want to take this pre op period and use it to come to terms with that kind of thing.

Be safe!