Anyone kept their procedure a secret?

[kem91 38]

I had a lot of resistance to sharing my decision to have VSG early on. I started researching the procedure in January, when only my mom knew. Then as things got more serious I filled in Dad, Sister, and brother in law. Thankfully they've all been incredibly supportive. Most of the negative reactions, or at least the ones I interpret as negative, have been people's own reaction to the news. I kind of assume I don't "look like" the kind of person who would get this kind of procedure because of my age (25) and body type (tall with weight around the hips, but evenly distributed).

I agree with the other commenters that you have to decide what you're comfortable doing, but especially now that I have a surgery date I'm excited about this change and couldn't care less what anyone else feels about it.

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On 2/21/2015 at 5:28 PM, FatboyNYC said:

I'm 27 6ft 345lbs and getting the procedure done march 25 and still haven't told ANYONE about it. i feel like I'm cheating my way into losing weight. i honestly don't plan on telling anyone and just say I'm on a "Diet"

Like plenty of people on here, i don't plan on spending my 30's like my 20's.

How many years have you been dieting or trying to lose the weight? For me, I've been on some form of diet kick since I was 13 years old. I am well into my 30's now so lets make math easy and say 20+ years. I worked hard and have up a lot of things during those years. I worked out. Broke bones. Tore tissue and muscle. I starved. I was rejected (friends, family, strangers and co-workers), I was laughed at. I was in my own head constantly degrading myself for not being successful.

I decided to move forward with my surgery and NONE of my family knows. This has been so important to me to maintain this secret. I assume my family would say the same - you cheated your weight loss. So what if I did? I don't believe I did but its not their life or their decisions to make. My surgery was 16 months ago and when asked - I say I changed my lifestyle. It is not a bit untrue. I had to. The surgery required me to. Small portions, less fat, less carbs, more frequent meal periods, working out, etc. I have shared with a few friends because they were my support system throughout it all. You owe yourself the chance to be healthy.

Best of luck to you in whatever you do and decide. This is your life to live to the fullest. Don't let anyone take it away from you!

[Rainbow_Warrior 996]

Such a range of ages and life experiences on this forum.

I am able to pick and choose who I tell about my upcoming surgery (Thur Oct 12).

Depending on which "audience" and what I know of his/her/its 'positivity' or 'negativity' is how much I share about my choice to go with my gastric bypass.

The people I tell everything: My wife, my daughter and her husband, my three siblings, my mother, my best-man and his wife, a couple of long-term colleagues. My son-in-law is my hero. He had his surgery in mid-2015 and at 188cm (6'2") he's more than halved his body mass ... originally 208kg (459 pounds) and now, 26 months later 101kg (223 pounds).

My best man and his wife have had FIVE gastric sleeve surgeries which they have failed to succeed with. His wife nearly died a couple of years ago as a result of a personal choice gone wrong. While she's currently weigh-loss surgery shy, he isn't and is having his gastric sleeve next Monday (11th Sept 2017).

I also have some overseas friends who have been internet "pen friends" and "confidants" for 20-30 years. We are linked by sharing lots of our lives with one another.

The people I tell nothing: There are some people I see regularly who I just can't be bothered to tell. Even though I mix with them (not always by choice), I won't say a word as they are so negative to anyone who is different, i.e. obese, black, Asian, protestant, catholic, islam ...

Most of these people are the type who treat me okay face-to-face when they need my professional or personal help but I am aware that they slag off about my weight or other people's religion or perceived beauty (or lack of it). I don't need their 5h1t or their opinion so I'll tell them nothing as he new version of me emerges.

- - -

I have no qualms about having my surgery here in the Newcastle-Lake Macquarie area as it's fine by me.

[whitmac 45]

I told my 2 bestbishes and my mom and daughter... I started working out months b4 and I plan on fully hibernating this winter while working out... so no I don't plan on letting everyone know that I had surgery

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[kaisimps 9]

I think it’s what your comfortable doing. I decided to be open about I️t to my co workers and family because I wanted their support and I think you’ll find just how supportive people will be when you tell them. It’s a lot to go through and not tell anyone. Everything is going to change. Your eating habits, your body, your diet.. people might notice that. Whatever you decide to do be proud that you’re doing this for you. Congratulations and good luck on your journey!

[Rainbow_Warrior 996]

14 hours ago, kaisimps said:

I think you’ll find just how supportive people will be when you tell them. It’s a lot to go through and not tell anyone.

My work place has become very dog-eat-dog over the last decade. Sharing with people who are of the ilk the new staff are does not do much good.

As for my family, there's the very accepted and very accepting 40%-45%, the tolerable/tolerated 15% and the 40%-45% who are absolute pains-in-the-arse. Some things that are mentioned to others become the subject of unhealthy persecution and/or ridicule.

And, yes, I am a supportive person when it comes to others but it's not always easy to get that support or respect back.