Parents trying to talk me out of VSG.

[Aria622 12]

Hi all!

I'm new here. I'm 24, 5"2 and weigh 267 pounds. Ive been researching VSG and other bariatric surgeries for some time now, and it looks like the Sleeve would be the best choice for me.

My family is trying to talk me out of it based on the fact that my mother a lot of complications after her gastric in 2001. My dad says "You two have the same genes, you will have complications too and you will regret it."

Part of me is afraid that I will regret my decision.

I'd like to hear from as many people as possible that have had VSG! Do you have any regrets whatsoever? Any complications? Would you recommend it to other people? What advice would you give someone that's going to have it?

Thank you in advance!

[jayhawkgirl 33]

If you haven't already, I'd recommend going to an educational session about the different types of weight loss surgery and perhaps consider taking your parents with you if possible. Surgery has advanced since 2001. Perhaps hearing the facts and knowing that you've fully researched the surgery will put their minds at ease.

My VGS surgery has been the best thing I've ever done for my health and my family is fully supportive. In fact, it's gone so well that my husband had it done as well! Best of luck to you!

[ProjectMe 909]

Until your mindset has changed to,"I'm getting this done for me and come what may, I will not regret it."...I recommend that you: Learn more about the disease obesity, Learn more about the surgery, and most importantly Learn more about yourself...

I've seen too many mentally unprepared people on this site who express regret at the first issue that arises...

[Chele H 427]

^^^ what she said^^^

Go to a seminar and a support meeting, meet and talk to people who have had the surgery. I went to 3 seminars to see what different surgeons had to say. Ask the surgeon at the seminar about risks, percentages of risks.

All surgeries have risks but so does being obese and let's be real, if you are 267 now...where do you think you will be in 5 or 10 years from now? We've all lost and gained hundreds of pounds. The older I got the harder it was to lose the weight without the surgery.

This is your decision only you know what is best for you. Best of luck to you!

[Miss Mac 6,262]

Complications are soooooo individual. I just turned 63 at my one year surgiversary for my sleeve. My oldest sister had a gastric bypass in 2000 with horrific complications including peritonitis and poor healing of the incision. This was not laparascopic. My next youngest sister had a gastric bypass in 2011 and has done very well. She looks and feels great and has lost at least 150 pounds and had plastics done as well to put everything back in place. She looks and feels better now at 55 than she did in high school.

I had my sleeve in December 2013. I have gone from a 53" waist to a 38" waist and have lost 66 pounds. I am a slow loser because of orthopedic and spinal issues making it difficult and painful to exercise, but I am only 14 pounds away from my doctor approving a panni, which would take another 12-15 pounds off, putting me close to goal. I have had ZERO complications, not even the shoulder gas that plagues so many people post-op for a few days.

At 5'4 and 235 pounds, I was almost as round as I was tall. At 5'2" and 267 pounds, you probably are too. You have the advantage of youth on your side and have so much life ahead of you. Excess weight is a thief and steals so much enjoyment from life.

If you are an independant woman, don't say another word, and just go do it. If you are still living with your parents, I like the idea of taking them along for an information session. This is not the easy way out - it will change your life and habits forever and takes new committment every day. I don't doubt that they want you to be healthy; they just are concerned that you might suffer like your mother has.

Don't wait forever. I have been on a diet since 1978, and GAINED an extra 80 pounds. In the end, it is about your own health. At the age of 24 you should be making your own decisions about your health and finding physicians and services that you are comfortable with.

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

Yeah, your dad sounds like a real bariatric medical marvel.

Shee.

[Aria622 12]

Thanks everyone:) I've already made my decision, I am going to go through with it. Knowing that it's major surgery makes me nervous, but I feel confident in the fact that I've done my research. This could change my life for the better, and I'm ready for that change. It will make be a better me overall, a better Nurse, a better Fiancé.

My parents minds are set and can't be changed. As far as they are concerned my mother "did the research too, and look where she ended up." But I know that this is a COMPLETELY different surgery, in a different time, and my mother and I are different people.

I really appreciate the encouragement and advice, thank you again!

[JerseyCityGal 231]

With any surgery comes risks.

As far as your father's comments about you two having the same genes and having the same complications .... well, he is way off base. Your DNA can make you more predisposed to certain risks. For instance, if both you and your mother shared the version A or G of gene ANKK1 marker rs1800497 on chromosome 11, you would both be 1.67 times more likely to experience post-operative nausea and vomiting within 6 hours after surgery if it appears at both copies, i.e. AA or GG.

While you would have inherited half your DNA from your mother, but the mix is random. Your siblings do not get the exact same 50% you did (except an identical twin). You also get half from your father. You would need to inherit both copies, one from each of your parents to get the small elevated risk of post-operative risk of vomiting I described above. And just because you vomited doesn't mean you have this. You could have just vomited. And you can have both copies and never, ever vomit after anesthesia.

If genetics were the way your father described, we would all be exactly alike, inside and out. It's nothing like that. While it is true that certain conditions are inherited (as are traits such as eye color), and genetic disorders are a very real thing, there is simply no such thing as having complications because you are someone's daughter.

He's not giving you misinformation because he doesn't love you. He's doing it because he is afraid and doesn't know any better.

You live in your body; not your mother and not your father. Only you can know in your heart if you can pull off the lifestyle changes that are necessary. If you can, go for it.

[Debbie Jean 406]

Thanks everyone:) I've already made my decision, I am going to go through with it. Knowing that it's major surgery makes me nervous, but I feel confident in the fact that I've done my research. This could change my life for the better, and I'm ready for that change. It will make be a better me overall, a better Nurse, a better Fiancé.

My parents minds are set and can't be changed. As far as they are concerned my mother "did the research too, and look where she ended up." But I know that this is a COMPLETELY different surgery, in a different time, and my mother and I are different people.

I really appreciate the encouragement and advice, thank you again!

You have great perspective. Keep your eyes on the goal and you will make believers out of them ????

[laurenella82 625]

I've never known complications from surgery to be genetic. Diseases that may result in needing surgery being genetic, yes, but not complications. It sounds like they are concerned. My dad went through the same thing. Tried to talk me out of it, but months before asked my mom if she thought I could benefit from it. Now he's giving me advice on how to do well. (he's never had any kind of surgery in his entire 56 years!)

When I made the decision to do this... and stuck to that decision, there was nothing anyone could say or do that would change my mind. We don't (or at least we shouldn't) be doing this to please anyone but us.

You may want to try to sit your parents down and educate them on VSG...or take them to a support group meeting (idk if yours allows family members, the ones at my hospital do). Print out some articles and let them read up on it.

God bless you on your journey! Your parents will come around!

Lauren

[Aria622 12]

Thank you Lauren!

[AlanaRN 419]

My dad was against it as well. I'm 34 and married mother of 3 so I was doing it regardless. My dad was against due to stuff he heard in the past about the bypass. He knew nothing about the sleeve. He was a nervous wreck for the surgery. However, he has never said another word since. He sees how well I am doing and is happy for me.

[oatmealgirl 56]

I agree with all the previous posters about you being your own woman and making decisions that are good for YOU, not based on what happened to one of your parents. With that being said, let's say you do vomit like a dog after the anesthesia and do experience horrible gas pains. So What! It won't last forever and you still will find it to be worth it! This surgery is not a magic bullet or pill, you will have to do work. But unlike with traditional diets, there's also a metabolic change that occurs and you will find that you will want to eat right and be able to move and work out more quickly. I say you are only 24 years old, go for it and live the rest of your life in a more manageable, healthy body. You have no idea how much life you've already given up until you have it back!

Also, it's perfectly normal to be nervous and second guess yourself after approval and days leading up to surgery. Most of us have done that too, but when you know that you know you're doing the right thing, you just persevere and follow through. That will be something you'll need to do over and over again before you reach your goal weight.

Best of everything to you and keep us posted!

[heynowkc 329]

I don't believe that her complications had anything to do with her genes! Or yours for that matter. Not to mention that they are two completely different surgeries and 2001 was 14 (!!!!!!) years ago and a lot has changed since then! If this is the right thing for you do not let them talk you out of it or worry you with negative thoughts. If you have already made this decision, the best thing to do is to let them know that the decision has been made so any conversation about it should only be about ways to support you and help you through it!

Hi all!
I'm new here. I'm 24, 5"2 and weigh 267 pounds. Ive been researching VSG and other bariatric surgeries for some time now, and it looks like the Sleeve would be the best choice for me.
My family is trying to talk me out of it based on the fact that my mother a lot of complications after her gastric in 2001. My dad says "You two have the same genes, you will have complications too and you will regret it."
Part of me is afraid that I will regret my decision.

I'd like to hear from as many people as possible that have had VSG! Do you have any regrets whatsoever? Any complications? Would you recommend it to other people? What advice would you give someone that's going to have it?

Thank you in advance!