I feel unsupported... Can I do this by myself?

[bikrchk 1,313]

It's ideal to have the support of those we love, but unfortunately many do not. I'm single and live alone. Once I got my mom on board, there was going to be no keeping her away, but I didn't "need" her there to do anything for me, (other than call an ambulance just in case something went really, really wrong). I recovered quickly and was back at work the next week. If things go well, as long as you have help with the kids, (you won't be able to lift and will have limited energy for the first few weeks), you got this!

I echo the "find a support group" comments. Even for those of us with supportive friends and families. Face to face support can be invaluable.

[BLERDgirl 6,417]

I did it on my own. I don't have little ones at home, just a cat. I was fortunate enough that I didn't have any pain post-op. I did all my prep and was able to tend to my cats feeding, litter box cleaning etc.... on my own. As for your spouse, it may be fear. As long as he doesn't sabotage you by trying to tempt you with foods you shouldn't have you should be fine.

[jayhawkgirl 33]

Sorry you're having to face this. I agree with the others. You CAN do this! There could be a multitude of reasons for your husband's attitude, but the only one who knows him and probably has the best idea is you. Regardless, this is about living a longer, healthier life! I would think that anyone who truly loves you will get on board...especially if they have NO OTHER option!

[Krauselor 1]

I am in the same situation as you. My husband is not supportive at all. Currently, he is working overseas and I am in US. We Skype every day. He asked me today," So how long will it take for you to eat around this surgery?" He did not want me to have it in the first place and now he is thinking that I will gain the weight back.

I had my surgery on 2/13, so I am 4 days post op. I do have the support of my mother, but that's it. The lack of support makes me even more determined to be successful. I will show my husband that I will lose all my excess weight and keep it off.

I have pretty much done everything on my own without a problem. Best of luck to you!

[BLERDgirl 6,417]

I am in the same situation as you. My husband is not supportive at all. Currently, he is working overseas and I am in US. We Skype every day. He asked me today," So how long will it take for you to eat around this surgery?" He did not want me to have it in the first place and now he is thinking that I will gain the weight back.

I had my surgery on 2/13, so I am 4 days post op. I do have the support of my mother, but that's it. The lack of support makes me even more determined to be successful. I will show my husband that I will lose all my excess weight and keep it off.

I have pretty much done everything on my own without a problem. Best of luck to you!

WOW! That is worse than unsupportive. Sorry you have to deal with that.

[jillstl 55]

This must be a common occurrence. My husband can be an insensitive asshole too. He likes to criticize my choices as being too impulsive and unnecessary. In the end, we don't live our lives for our spouses and while we may love them and want their support, we don't have to have it in order to succeed. Eventually they will either come around or they won't and sometimes relationships can be damaged as a result. I have a tendency not to consult my husband before I make decisions because generally he's not supportive. But to be fair I sometimes just don't want to hear what he has to say because I don't want him to rain on my parade. So good luck to you and keep posting on here so that we but can continue to watch your journey I don't know about you but I'm super excited!! And those hubbies...well they can kiss our skinny asses!

[purrfctangel 239]

I am thinking being single could be an advantage.

[roni99123 3]

We will all be here to support you! You can do this girl, hold or head high, and be strong.

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

I've had two husbands: One was an asshole, the other is a saint.

I like the saint a helluva lot better!

[jillstl 55]

I've had two husbands: One was an a*****e, the other is a saint.

I like the saint a helluva lot better!

Hehehe well said!

[roni99123 3]

Hehehe well said!

hi Jill I'm new to all this can u please explain to me how I post my own stuff like questions and where to go I'm so confused lol

[Garifab_VSG 122]

I honestly can't see staying with someone who is so unsupportive of something of this nature. I'm so sad to see so many unsupportive spouses. I also wonder how many of these spouses are generally controlling people by nature.

[kyrickchick64 468]

I hope it's just because of his own insecurity about losing you that made him say that and he will turn around. Is he overweight as well?

You got this.

[kyrickchick64 468]

Hope your surgery went well

[sallyg26 9]

he is feeling threatened, my husband and i have been married 39 years and he is pretty much the same. love yourself and carryon, this isn't about him its about you.