Family Struggle

[hstrayorn 26]

So, in 19 days I will be heading to the doctor for my last visit before my WLS. The Struggle I am having is that my wife insist on bringing everything unhealthy Snacks in the house she can find. I fill up my lunch box with healthy thinks to keep that with me, but lets be honest, i break some times. Additionally, She should not be eating these things because she is a diabetic type 1. But when I try to relay this to her she is always getting angry as if I'm offending her. As I move towards surgery, what are some ways I can fight these temptations.

[CC197823 42]

My nutritionist gave me a great idea because I have teenage boys and a husband that have no problem eating everything and not gaining weight. She said that if you see it you will eat it, even if you don't want it you will just walk in the kitchen and graze. She said to get a basket or one of those big totes (like you would put christmas decorations in) and put the Snacks in there and then in a pantry. That way your family can still have access but you don't have to see it.

[Sparklingbeauty53 202]

I suspect something is going on here involving her fears for you. Talk to her honestly about your decision, research, reasons for why and find out her true feelings about this. Get her to be honest. Tell her the items she is bringing in are tasty but are not good for either of you so why is she bringing them in? What does it really mean? Is she purposely bringing them in to hurt you and your efforts? I think communication is the key here. Maybe she thinks you will die during surgery? Maybe she feels food is love? If she insists on bringing in foods that are bad maybe they could stay in the trunk of the car so they are out of your sight? Strike a deal that certain items are too tempting for you and can't be in the house. You both have to agree on this so she can be your biggest fan as you do this journey.

[amponder 396]

I have a very similiar situation, my husband will not change his habits of buying chips, pop, and things I can't have, unfortunately for me, he sometimes will go grocery shopping with out me on his way home for work because he is afraid I won't buy certain things and he's right I won't we have a budget and honestly because I went through a lot of trouble to have this surgery my health comes before bringing in lost of Snacks, as we speak I have nothing but Protein shakes that I can have for Breakfast tomorrow, because he did this if it hadn't been for a wedding I just went to tonight I wouldn't have got a decent dinner, which was turkey carrots cheese and a spoonful of potatoe salad. I don't expect him to change his eating habits 100% because it has to be his choice, but I do expect him to be more supportive of mine so we are going to go grocery shopping tomorrow or the you know what will hit the fan. I actually am not to drink Protein Shakes anymore if my Dr. knew he'd throw a fit on me.

[Elode 8,093]

@@hstrayorn I ate in my room during pre-op (no hunger after so no issue there) My husband and kids where very forgetful about leaving junk on the counters in my line of view so after awhile I started hiding all their crap, they eventually got sick of looking for it and decided to keep things put up. Amazing how well that worked!

[k9nana 50]

My surgery isn't until March 3rd. I have been practicing healthy eating since Thanksgiving. It's hard to do during the holidays but it doesn't have to last for a month. I had 2 days where I made conscious bad choices and that was Thanksgiving day and Christmas day. After that I told my husband to have his junk food when he goes out or when I'm not home. It has been a team effort and has really helped. I think that he is finally on board with my decision to become healthy.

When I first started to research WLS I know that he felt threatened and that HIS life would change. They don't undersrand that their life would change with an unhealthy spouse due to weight related health issues or death.

Now my husband understands and is being supportive. Concerned but supportive.

[CheleLynn45 615]

I have a very similiar situation, my husband will not change his habits of buying chips, pop, and things I can't have, unfortunately for me, he sometimes will go grocery shopping with out me on his way home for work because he is afraid I won't buy certain things and he's right I won't we have a budget and honestly because I went through a lot of trouble to have this surgery my health comes before bringing in lost of Snacks, as we speak I have nothing but Protein shakes that I can have for Breakfast tomorrow, because he did this if it hadn't been for a wedding I just went to tonight I wouldn't have got a decent dinner, which was turkey carrots cheese and a spoonful of potatoe salad. I don't expect him to change his eating habits 100% because it has to be his choice, but I do expect him to be more supportive of mine so we are going to go grocery shopping tomorrow or the you know what will hit the fan. I actually am not to drink Protein Shakes anymore if my Dr. knew he'd throw a fit on me.

Why are you not suppose to drink Protein shakes anymore???

[amponder 396]

@CheleLynn45 I guess all Drs are different but my Dr. says because they go right through the band they don't make you full like they are supposed to so it's possible for some people to overeat by drinking Protein shakes, he wants ALL my Protein to come from food the Protein drinks for a band patient is in pre-op stage and the 1st 3 wks of after surgery.

[CheleLynn45 615]

@amponder I didn't realize you had had the lap band. I missed that. I know Dr's vary with their requirements but I hadn't heard of anyone with the sleeve not having to drink Protein drinks so I was curious.

I hope your grocery shopping with your hubby goes well tomorrow!!

[lisacaron 5,075]

@@amponder Your doc is right about the shakes going right through the band, however in the absence of something good to eat that is packed with Protein a shake is the way to go.

Don't always think of "breakfast" as having to eat yogurt or oatmeal or eggs you can have anything. Turkey, chicken, even a nice bit of steak. Improvise and you will find ways to make sure you have what you need.

It's hard to keep everyone in the household supportive of us, but even more with spouses who are not on the same page. Perhaps reminding them that you did this for you so you could be healthy and happy and share a long happy life with them as well they will be able to be a bit more understanding.

When we tell people they can't or shouldn't have something I know from myself that it only makes me want it that much more in spite of it and the person telling me. So use a bit of psychology here and don't do that.

Once in an argument with my Dad who just had quadruple bypass surgery he was fighting with my Mom about having to eat rubber chicken for the rest of his life etc. I told my mother to go out and buy him his bacon and sausage and meatballs and salami and all that stuff and give it to him. Make him a BIG heart attack dinner. So we did and his response..are you trying to kill me? Where's the chicken?

That ended that ordeal