Accountability Group

[enjoythetime 1,457]

I've done some thinking over the past couple of days and for me it's a very fine line of balancing a life long life-style vs. getting caught up in all the "goods" and "bads". I believe we always have to be conscious of our choices but how do we balance it all out to where there are no categories for good and bad it just becomes living life? I'm really struggling with this. I don't want to count everything that goes into my mouth for the rest of my life or worry that because I had a slice of whatever that I'm doomed and 5lbs will appear. @@JustWatchMe I think this goes along with your post a little. How do we find that balance where food isn't good or bad it's just food but that we're still mindful but not OCD? How does this all balance itself out to where we can still lose or maintain or whatever our situation is?

Edited March 6, 2015 by enjoythetime

[bacon 514]

For some reason this morning I was taking my pills and one of them got hung up and it really hurt for about 3 hours. I have not had that happen for a real long time. The steange thing is, now I can barely get fluids in. No way am I going to get solid food through. I did call doc office and was told to go to the ER. I have no Fluid in my band. So idk.. Thoughts??

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

@@enjoythetime, I'm dealing with that too. I stopped logging my food and so then when I have a less than ideal day, time to blame and shame myself. Ugh. I still have fifty pounds to lose and I can't believe my motivation to do the hard work has waned so much. What the heck. I'm not stupid. I know I'll struggle with weight all my life. Heck, I've lost more than this before. Consciously I'm not expecting the magical cure. But am I expecting it subconsciously? The stupid thing is that I wasn't struggling this hard twenty pounds ago. Moderate eating was letting the weight fall off. Not anymore.

I have every reason in the world to be motivated to dig in and get to goal. Be my best physical self, especially now as I face the NSETBEx in this godawful divorce. Grit my teeth and just do it, dammit. If I did that I could be at goal by the end of summer. But I'm complacent. I'm still obese but comfortable in the world today. I blend in. I fit in chairs and don't get embarrassed eating in public. Why is that good enough now?

I want it all. I really do. So what the hell is going on with me?

It's not like I'm not focusing on the emotional stuff. I go to two CoDA meetings and at least one OA meeting a week. I see a therapist every two weeks for the divorce.

I don't know. I just don't know.

I keep thinking somehow exercise will be my salvation. Yet I can't seem to commit to a gym. I'm actually afraid of it. (????)

I'm so scared of giving up on myself.

@@bacon, if you can drink warm tea or anything warm maybe the pill will dissolve over time. But you're probably irritated and may have to baby your band for the rest of the day with liquids. Unless you can't drink I would think the ER might be overkill, but only you know how severe it feels. Also, you don't want to go into the weekend with any issues and not be able to reach your doctor. Let us know how you're feeling.

[bacon 514]

@@JustWatchMe I think we all need to change the mindset of "I will always struggle with my weight". Im talking to me too, im not beating you up.. If we think we will always struggle then we've already given up. Why are we trying at all? Give yourself some credit. Deep inside you have hope of lasting change.

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

Well it's definitely easier than without WLS. But not easy.

[bacon 514]

I got some food through finally. All I had through the day was a bottle of muscle milk, and a bottle of v8. Three bottles of Water as well. dinner was a bit too big. I had a bowl of chili and half a pb sandwich. I then had a handful of chips. As I said dinner was big but the total cal for the day was ok. No e-kill. I did get my brothers heap ot of the driveway. 265k mile Honda lives on!

[s_suther 446]

1036 c, 91 p, 45 nc

Made a change to my plan by slicing the homemade pizza into 6 slices instead of 4 so that I could have a small treat. To stay on plan, I went to the store after dinner and bought sweet freedom krunch lite. It was 100 cal & no added sugar. It was a nice splurge with NO GUILT. Can I get an amen?!?

I did a 32 minute video this am and a 45 minute one this pm, so exercise is a check.

Tomorrow is my higher calorie/carb day, but I've already got it all planned out. I'll post that plan tomorrow.

I hope you guys are rocking your plan. Let's try not to take a step backward this weekend. Who's with me???

[enjoythetime 1,457]

Amen girl!!! Love those sweet indulgences that are guilt free but oh so tasty!!!

Doing good stayed on plan need 32 oz of Water before the night ends, no prob. Approx 1200 for the day.

Tomorrow

B: yogurt & trail mix 250 cal 17 p

S:skinny cow ice cream 160 cal

L: 1 chicken & spiniach enchilada from my fav mex place-no clue on cal. Dont care;)

D: Protein Bar 160 cal 20p

88 oz Water

Exercise spring cleaning and playing outside with the kids

Edited March 7, 2015 by enjoythetime

[enjoythetime 1,457]

@@JustWatchMe you can do this!!! Youre going to hit your goal, I believe in you 110% and I'm cheering for you all the way!!

Use that nasty divorce as your motivation!! Think of strutin' your stuff, like yeah, you messssssed up!!

[bacon 514]

The plan.

B 3 small sausage patties.

S 1 banana.

L turkey breast green Beans.

S granola bar.

D no clue..

Planing on getting some walking in at work. This evening we are going to take our boys to the YMCA. So I think I will get some activity there.

I'm fixin' to throw out a challenge for all of us. More to come.

[2babutterfly 483]

Yesterday was a good day! Stayed on my food plan, got my Water in, and went to the gym for the 3 rd day this week! I aimed for 9000 steps on my fit bit yesterday and I was 300 short right before bedtime so who was marching around the house?? This girl! ???? the hubs thought I was crazy! Lol! But I got em! I made my hubby hide the scale so I'm having a little withdrawal this morning....my plan is to weigh on Fridays.

The weekend is here..prob the time most of us struggle ( I know I do) so here is my plan today...

B--1/2protein shake in my coffee &agreed yogurt

L-- out shopping today so nuggets from chick fillet

S-- Starbucks treat

D-- blackened salmon and a grilled veggie

It'll be harder today ( my gym is closed on the weekends) but I'm still aiming for 9000 steps today

Can't wait to hear from all of you!

[enjoythetime 1,457]

@@2babutterfly look at you go girl! That's Abso freakin lutely amazing!!

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

Thanks everyone. Attitude is everything, so today I'm keeping my head in the game.

My daughter is home (❤️) and we are going for haircuts now, followed by Breakfast out with my mom. No potatoes or bread for me. eggs and bacon.

After that, my daughter and I have to take her laptop for analysis. Her hard drive crashed yesterday and she wasn't backed up, of course. She's due for a new one (it's over 5 years old) so even if they rescue her data we probably have to buy a new one.

And then today or tomorrow she and I are going to go to one or two realtor open houses. Scared out of my wits, and I'm nowhere ready to buy, but it's time for me to look forward and plan for the day when this divorce is over and I start again in my own place. As I said, I'm nearly paralyzed with fear thinking about moving. But I need to take the first step, which is to dream. And an open house or two can get those wheels spinning.

Thanks for all your encouraging words. I will use the divorce as motivation. Interestingly, I think that's actually been part of my problem. Some messed up concept of unworthiness.

I am worthy of good things. A new life, a new body, a new home.

I'm going to achieve my goals.

Today I'm going to stay on plan with my food which is high Protein and no snacking and very low carbs.

This will be a successful Saturday!

Bacon, glad you're eating. Whew!

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

It's 32 degrees here. Finally, a heat wave!! Taking my poor pooch for a neighborhood walk today. Way overdue.

[enjoythetime 1,457]

Ok had to post this because Im kickin my weekend off to a great start. My husband calls me and asks do u want me to bring home your favorite------ and I said nope, I don't need it. He was proud and I must say so I am because this one indulgence is what I believes throws me off every weekend. Yayyyyyyyyyy baby!! Out of sight, out of mind. Now back to spring cleaning.

Rock it ya'll!

Edited March 7, 2015 by enjoythetime