Accountability Group

[bacon 514]

Ok. I really want to get some exercise in. I feel like calling my brother up and hitting the wrestling mat for an hour with him, but that would just be nutty. He'd put a beating on me good. So I am going to shoot for an outdoor walk if it has stopped raining.

I have a chiropractor apt in the morning, so I will get exercise in before that. I am going to flood myself with Water and wait for a stomach growl before eating again. I'm pretty sore around my band, so it will be mushies tomorrow. We are taking the boys to my dads and step moms. It is supposed to snow 9-12 inches starting at noon. REALLY hoping to get snowed in alone with my wife!

Anyway, That is the plan for tomorrow. I will try to check in after exercise.

[enjoythetime 1,457]

@@bacon I'm with @@s_suther lets make a plan meal by meal if thats what it takes. You're not giving up, you care, you want this or else you wouldn't be on here telling us about the good, bad and the ugly!!

As far as the jerk that left you that letter, really who does that??? Ill tell you, an a*****e that has some serious misery in their own life. Trust me no one who's happy with themselves goes out of their way to make someone else feel like crap. Forget them, move on, they're not worth your time!

What is worth your time??? Your health!!! Im going to be veeeery blunt with you right now(because I want to help) You know you can't binge like that followed by throwing up, you know what the effects of that can be on your body, your band. You're a husband and a Dad and I know those are the ones who mean the most to you, those are the ones you need to be around for!!!

Put that damn scale away!!!! You know what? I'll do it with you I need to stop too!!

Here's the plan for weighing. We both weighed today so neither one of us can weigh again until next Friday!!! From there we weigh once a week, period, no cheating!! We have to start believing we're more than just a # on the scale. Our worth is so much greater!!

Ill share something with you, tonight I was feeling extremely sorry for myself because tomorrow would've been my dads 71st bday. He passed away 12 years ago at the age of 59 from cancer. This man was my rock. I know most everyone looks at their dad that way but he honesty was an amazing man who taught me that nothing in life is handed to you and that nothing worth having comes easy. He worked his ass off for his family, he had a "hard" exterior with a heart of gold that would do anything for anyone BUT he never allowed anyone to walk on him in fact he would be the first to put you in your place. He never knew a stranger, he was a man of his word, a fighter like no other Ive ever seen, he always had a good attitude, not much could bring him down, most importantly he loved God and he wasnt ashamed of that he would tell everyone he met his story, which was amazing. Even when he was going through chemo he still had a smile and would always say I'm going to kick this cowards ass even when he knew there was no chance.

Anyway, sorry for that ramble but this is why I found myself setting on the couch tonight crying, feeling sorry for myself and I could literally hear him yelling what the hell are you doing, stop sitting around snotting over me I'm great, I'm in heaven pain free.

I had a treat myself tonight and I started down that road and STOPPED why because I know he wouldn't want that for me. He would be so mad at me if I used him as an excuse for my bad choices and then beat myself up about it the next day! See when my Dad became ill is when I REALLY started putting on weight. At one point I had lost 48lbs and he told me I'm so proud of you. He never saw me at my heaviest but he's where I get my fight, he's the reason why I try to have a positive outlook on life, he's the reason I am who I am today and I just hope he's proud!!

@@bacon we are here to hold each other accountable right? I really am just trying to help, are you in???

Edited March 4, 2015 by enjoythetime

[JustWatchMe 7,117]

All of you are warriors. Keep up the fight.

I am too. I had a mixed day with the food. It went fine up through lunch but I ate a carby dinner which didn't do me any favors.

I went to an FA meeting. Not my cup of tea. It was very different from my OA meeting in tone and content, which surprised me. But I gave it a try.

I'm living with my mom while I am going through this divorce. My girls are living here too, but they're away at college at the moment. My mother is becoming increasingly angry day to day and it's getting very hard to take. She's lashing out at me and to avoid taking the bait, I spend a lot of time out of the house at 12 step meetings or at the movies. Anybody who says food addiction is not as serious as alcohol or drugs has not lived with a food addicted raging parent.

Enough whining. I got my stairs in and because my knees have been hurting so much lately, I scheduled my cortisone shots for tomorrow. I was bummed about that, but then realized it's been six months since my last shot in just one knee, compared to pre WLS when I had shots in both knees every four months. So that's progress. If I hadn't fallen on the ice three times this winter and then twisted my knee badly attempting Zumba a few weeks ago, I could probably have waited another month. But it is what it is.

Tomorrow high Protein and low carb and lots of Water. I did drink a lot of Water today.

Carry on, Warriors!

[bacon 514]

Thank you ladies for sharing and caring. @@enjoythetime just to clarify, I think at this point I'm probably only going to weigh at the doctors. I just can't deal with the numbers right now. I'd love to hear how you are doing though. I have an apt with my family doc in 1 week. I will post that weight.

I know yesterday was bad. I try to be tough and I was real weak yesterday. I was heading home, and out admin. asst. and I were talking and pretty much out of the blue she said "He (another driver that drives my truck at night), is the same age as my youngest. You know the one with the heroin addiction. I always think my son could be in his position with a good job at such a young age." Immediately we both started balling. I know all about her sons addiction and have been there for support for her. When you work at a place for a long time, you tend to bear each other burdens. I could only think of my own boys and how I pray they will never have to face these addictions.

@@JustWatchMe You are right food addiction is real as drug and alcohol. I was an alcoholic before I was saved 10 years ago. I personally believe God took that desire for alcohol away the very moment I believed. I truly believe he take certain desires away from us and lets us rely on Him day to day with other sins and desires. Paul said he ask God three times to remove his "thorn in the flesh" , but God told Paul that He was enough and left him with it.

I think one of the weird things about food addiction is, we need food to survive. One can certainly survive without alcohol and drugs, but not food. I'm not in any way saying it is easier or harder either way, just a weird dynamic.

The stupid thing about food is it is celebrated and glamorized, even in the Church.

Sorry for babbling, I'm simply trying to ignore the elliptical in the corner.. LOL.

[s_suther 446]

Today's plan:

B-8 oz Protein shake w/ Fiber

L-yogurt w/ granola & Fiber

S- 8 oz Protein Shake w/ fiber

D-4 oz meatloaf, veg

863 c, 85 p, 46 nc

exercise & Water

@@bacon - please don't see sharing as babbling. I am thrilled that you got on here to share. I'm glad that you're talking to us and letting us help and hold you accountable. I'm also glad you recognize that the scale is detrimental. We've had this discussion before and I shared that it will kill my joy to step on that darn thing. I'm going to weigh monthly at my doc, got my new nurse to agree to chart it for me too. I'm sure yours will do the same. I will check here throughout the day to make sure you're on track, doing what you said you would do.

@@enjoythetime - I admire your strength and willpower to recognize the treat for what it was and walk away. I'm going to hold you to not weighing until next week.

@@JustWatchMe - I wondered about you and the FA meeting. After some digging into it yesterday, I figured out it wasn't for me either and I didn't even go to a meeting. I think it's admirable that you went and tried a meeting. I'm sorry about your mom's anger, that can't be easy. Kudos for you going to the doc to take care of those knees so that you can exercise. Making it happen!!

I have prayed for each of you this morning. I hope you have a peaceful, happy day. Thank you for sharing, for encouraging, for kicking butt when needed. I so admire the strength and courage demonstrated in your posts. You are all amazing! Hang tough today, work your plan, and post here so that we hear from you.

[bacon 514]

30 min e-killed it. Walked mostly. Feel sluggish.

[enjoythetime 1,457]

Today is going to be a great day because I'm going to make it one! Taking the kiddos tonight to see Disney on Ice, not sure who's more excited them or me:-) Probably will grab a quick dinner on the way there, probably Wendy's so no problem I will just work it into my "plan" for today (which as you can see below is really under-developed). My goal is not to go over 1338 cal. for today. 88 oz of Water and I will try for those darn stairs again. Yesterday I got pulled into a meeting that went a lot longer than expected so the stairs didn't happen. However, today, I think the stairs and moving around as much as possible will help me get through this day with a smile.

Today's plan

B: Yogurt & trail mix- 250 cal 17p

L: Not sure something light and low cal- try not to exceed 250 cal- maybe another jimmy johns unwich for 170 cal 22p (although yesterday the lettuce didn't seem to go down as normal.)

D: Wendy's 4pc spicy chicken nuggets 170 cal 10p

S: For Disney on Ice- Protein Bar 160 cal 20p

I'm going to try and "save" some of my calories in case something unexpected comes along so I don't blow it out of the Water and if nothing unexpected comes along well then I'll just add that as a win and hopefully this will assist in my weigh-in next Friday:-)

Let's continue moving forward, no looking back, full speed ahead with our heads held high, shoulders back, smile on, working it! We should all remember how awesome we are and that just because we hit a bump now and then, that doesn't change a thing, we all get up and we're back at it today and that's ALL that matters! We don't have to be perfect to be successful! What is perfection any way?? I don't know because I've never seen it!

1-2-3 BREAK!

[enjoythetime 1,457]

Oh Oh I have a question. So I'm having some serious drainage issues, I'm not sick I don't have a cold just a lot of drainage, anyway my question has anyone else experienced this changing things with your band? It seems like when it's really bad (towards the end of the day) that some times when I eat food feels like it's setting in the back of my throat, not sure if it really is or if it's just the feeling because of all the other gunk. Also some times I will notice a tightness in the back of my throat, nothing gets stuck and things are moving through good, no pb'ing, I do think I experienced sliming for the first time the other day, that was lovely. Sorry for all the details, I've just not experienced this before and the only change I can think of is the sinus's. Any advice or experience with this would be greatly appreciated. Thanks all!

[s_suther 446]

@@enjoythetime - Sliming...the joy. I have more trouble eating and drinking and it seems tight when I've got drainage. When in doubt, my NP tells me to go to clears for 24 hrs, to liquids/creamies for a couple of days, and has me take a prescription liquid (carafate) that helps with inflammation. It works. How about an expectorant (mucinex) for the drainage?

[enjoythetime 1,457]

@@s_suther thanks great advice. I will see how today plays out and if that feeling is still there then tomorrow I will go on Clear liquids and then progress as you suggested. When you say tightness are you referring to a tightness in your band or a tightness in the back of your throat?

Thanks again!

[ParaGirl 71]

I chose to make yesterday my carb nite, (carb refeed). I eat low carb during the day, then have carbs in the evening.

B - Bullet proof coffee

snack - 1 5/8 oz. peanuts

L - Atkins chili

D - Longhorn, some of their yummy bread (not too much)

About 3-4 oz. filet, potato, 3/4 cup ice cream, 3 Cookies

[s_suther 446]

@@enjoythetime - it's in my throat, like I need to clear it, but it's down too low somehow.

[2babutterfly 483]

@@bacon I'm sorry you had a rough one yesterday I agree with enjoythetime...put that scale away! I just wanted you to know after I walked in the treadmill, I did 8 minutes on the ekill yesterday because of you! I know it's a short time on it but I did it because you are always talking about it. So yesterday you were my inspiration.

@@enjoythetime that is such an accomplishment to just stop with the treat cycle! Just goes to show your daddy is still helping guide you! @justwatchme. I'm sorry you are having those struggles with your mom. I'm glad you are able to recognize the problem and remove yourself before it triggers things for you! Also congrats on a longer time with your shots! That's a positive!@ssuther your plan sounds good and now I want to make a meatloaf. Actually I want my hubby to his is better than mine. I didn't get to put my white chicken chili in the crock because it was full of leftovers in the fridge. But when I do it I'll let you know how it was

❤️my support group here!!

[enjoythetime 1,457]

Great thanks! Yep its the same feeling. I just started panicing I guess it's normal. I have some muciniex at home that I will give a try today! Thanks again for the advice prayers and support!

@@enjoythetime - it's in my throat, like I need to clear it, but it's down too low somehow.

[enjoythetime 1,457]

@@2babutterfly your words mean more than you'll ever know! THANK YOU!