did you tell people?

[Bandista 7,466]

I didn't tell very many people -- husband, a few really good friends, etc. We are all different. I'm an introvert and don't enjoy attention -- it stresses me out. I don't want people observing or discussing my progress. There are a couple of people on my short list who I wish I hadn't told -- not because of any ramifications but because I want my surgery to be kept private. If one person tells their sister or neighbor, or whomever...it can become exponential. We live in a small town. I don't see my role as educating the world about WLS, though I do enjoy coming here for support and to help others. YOU are my community in the know.

[Pepper123 320]

Those who had to know and that includes my mum...sisters ,my best mate and a coworker....and thats my need to know list...

[scstxrn 213]

I told everyone who asked... started with my husband and my family (although except my husband, I left off the Mexico part till I was back.) I told my boss and a couple of coworkers, and the next day everyone knew.. and that was ok with me. I answer the questions people ask, I try to remember to post my weekly number on face book - but, for example, my scale broke last week... I seem to be the least irritated by it. I know I'm on plan, so I know I'm losing fat.

Got a new scale today and put an end to everyone else's anxiety.

Now I tell the waitress at the restaurant when they look all concerned cause I only ate 4 or 5 bites of my food... and I answer their questions, too, if they have any.

[swtnss 3]

I only told my ex husband and that was only because I needed a lift to the hospital and I guessed at least one person should know in case something went wrong. If people do ask me directly if I have had WLS I will tell them however my weight loss is slow at this stage and I have lost a lot of weight once before so it shouldn't surprise ppl. I had a number of procedures done with the sleeve which family and friends do know about so I just say its because of the surgery I had. I wont lie however I do not feel I want to share the information as yet.

My question is though I am heading on holidays and I wondered what ppl do in restaurants etc? Also the not drinking and eating at the same time I find difficult when heading out for Breakfast as that normally includes juice and coffee and I cannot spend hours in a restaurant/café.

[scstxrn 213]

@@swtnss

Assuming that it's not with people who used to eat Breakfast with you frequently, you can always order a cup of coffee or tea and just say, "oh - I drink my breakfast."

So far as what to do in restaurants - I'm picky, and I order what I order exactly how I want. i.e. this morning, it was machaca, no eggs, no jalapenos, no tortilla, salsa on the side, and I like my hash browns extra crispy. With Water.

I had a couple of sips of Water first (My doctor specifically said it was ok to drink with meals, as long as I included that in my oz count.) then I ate a few bites of shredded beef and onion, dipped in to salsa, and I ate the very top crust of my hash browns.. other than the waitress asking if they weren't crispy enough, no one really noticed.

Edited January 12, 2015 by scstxrn

[James Marusek 5,244]

I told everyone even strangers on the street. Most people were either supportive or curious about the operation.

After I lost the weight, many people were confused. They equated weight loss surgery with dieting. They would ask how much weight I lost and then they would congratulate me for all my effort. It tried to explain that it was the surgery that produced the weight loss and I was only along for the ride. But they never really understood.

[LadyK44 263]

In the office I feel like the spokesman for WLS. I really did tell a lot of people. Somehow everyone knows. I don't care. I answer questions and give my limited experience. I live in one body and use it as my reference. I look and feel different after lossing almost 80 pounds. If I can help someone else I will.

[SuzeMuze 338]

I told everyone even strangers on the street. Most people were either supportive or curious about the operation.

After I lost the weight, many people were confused. They equated weight loss surgery with dieting. They would ask how much weight I lost and then they would congratulate me for all my effort. It tried to explain that it was the surgery that produced the weight loss and I was only along for the ride. But they never really understood.

Wow, how fortunate for you if the WLS "produced the weight loss & you were only along for the ride"! I wish I could say that my journey was effortless like yours. Truth be told, this is the hardest damned thing I've ever done, and way more work than I'd ever thought. (though I don't regret anything for a second!) I feel that if I didn't "diet", the surgery wouldn't' be nearly as successful. I never once looked at WLS as the "fix" for my weight problems, but rather as a tool to help ME do the work.

[scstxrn 213]

I think my experience has been a combination of dieting and Sleevie working her butt off. I am able to lose more weight than I ever have on a diet, and I'm not hungry.. thanks, Sleevie.

But if I sat around eating ice cream (it's been tempting at times)... then I don't think I'd have lost the weight I have either.

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

After I lost the weight, many people were confused. They equated weight loss surgery with dieting. They would ask how much weight I lost and then they would congratulate me for all my effort. It tried to explain that it was the surgery that produced the weight loss and I was only along for the ride. But they never really understood.

Wow. Just wow.

You're the only WLS patient I've ever seen say something like that.

That's not been my experience at all.

[LadyK44 263]

For me being sleeved has not been easy. The sleeve can stop the amount I eat at a time. However it does not stop me from eating junk all day. I just don't do that. WLS is a tool in my new life. It has not cured my food addiction which I battle daily. I wish my WLS didn't take this much work. It will be a lifetime of effort and making healthy choices. Hay but that is just my experience!

Edited January 13, 2015 by LadyK44

[MisforMimi 760]

People that know:

My s/o

My mama

Three work folks

6 friends of many, none of which have obvious food issues.

1 friend who my s/o leaked it to on accident

I'm pre-op and figure everyone didn't need to know before. I dont want to hear about your momma's hairdresser's sisters cousin who had weight loss surgery. Not of interest. I'll probably tell some folks who ask later. This has been a totally switch for me as I get closer to the date ie the day after tomorrow. I wasn't planning on telling anybody.

What I noticed when my plan was accidentally leaked was that I was initially very angry and then ASHAMED. I didn't want to be that fat person. That fat person that was so out of control she needed surgical intervention. Well the truth is I am that fat person. I'm that fat person that managed to loose weight once (140 lbs) and gained it all back. I'm that fat person that many celebrated previously and now have gone back to looking past. I'm not publicizing it, but I ain't lying either. Not my first time at the rodeo. Everyone who is fat will deal with those deep shameful feelings or keep eating. It's not required to disclose your information to work through your feelings obviously, and some days I will regret my decision perhaps to disclose. Who knows. For now I'll work on my snappy confident lipstick lady-esque comebacks and keep it moving. PS. Friends have been nothing but supportive. I think my tribe would never be anything but.....Good luck!

Edited January 13, 2015 by MisforMimi

[James Marusek 5,244]

Wow, how fortunate for you if the WLS "produced the weight loss & you were only along for the ride"! I wish I could say that my journey was effortless like yours. Truth be told, this is the hardest damned thing I've ever done, and way more work than I'd ever thought. (though I don't regret anything for a second!) I feel that if I didn't "diet", the surgery wouldn't' be nearly as successful. I never once looked at WLS as the "fix" for my weight problems, but rather as a tool to help ME do the work.

Unlike others, I was never really into dieting. I tried two diets in my life. The first was a low fat diet. That was a total disaster. I was climbing the walls with hunger. I didn't loose weight and my blood pressure went through the roof. Later I tried a low carb diet. That one worked but after a while it was hard to stay on it. There is a lot of effort when one tries to lose weight and diet. Undergoing bariatric surgery has a lot of effort but it is dealing with the complexity of meeting the meal, liquid, Vitamin, Protein requirements. Hunger is not constantly gnawing at your bones. So in a way it is effortlessly - it just happens.

[LadyK44 263]

Unlike others, I was never really into dieting. I tried two diets in my life. The first was a low fat diet. That was a total disaster. I was climbing the walls with hunger. I didn't loose weight and my blood pressure went through the roof. Later I tried a low carb diet. That one worked but after a while it was hard to stay on it. There is a lot of effort when one tries to lose weight and diet. Undergoing bariatric surgery has a lot of effort but it is dealing with the complexity of meeting the meal, liquid, Vitamin, Protein requirements. Hunger is not constantly gnawing at your bones. So in a way it is effortlessly - it just happens.

I just wanted to say. "Effortless" is the wrong word for most of us on this journey. I think see most of us work hard at becoming healthier and staying that way. You have your own very unique experience. I can respect that and even repeat to others. However learn today for the other 99.00/100 this requires a lifetime of effort and a complete lifestyle change. Additionally long-term success depends primary on commitment to change. food is addictive and most fat people are addicted. I hope you have continued success.

Edited January 13, 2015 by LadyK44

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

@@LadyK44

Yup. The sleeve / WLS is just a tool. We use the tool. Or we try to beat the tool.

Sounds to me like you need to add some more tools.

Have you ever considered counseling / therapy / coaching to address your eating disorder(s)?